Funny way to wake up..

Haha, I just did something so evil i'd call it black comedy.

So I'm all cozy in my bed having incredible dreams, when all of the sudden my doorbell rings. So I wake up thinking who the fuck's at my house so early? I check outside before I go downstairs to get the door and I see this man wearing a suit and holding a huge bag and a few books. "Soliciter", came to mind.. and this is where it all goes wrong.

I go to the kitchen.. all look for the BIGGEST mother fucking knife I can find. I then go answer the door, leaving my hand holding the knife behind the door.

"Hey there! Oh man, I hope I didn't wake you up!" He says.
"No problem man", I says.. "I just hope you're not some SO-LI-CI-TER." (Note: After each syllable of the word, I would bang the blade of the knife on the side of the door, to let him see it). I also gave him the most eccentric stare any human being could ever give to another.

"I huh.. I was wondering if Vincent was home." He then proceeds.
"There are no Vincents here, sir."
"Oh must be the wrong house, sorry about that!" Dashed away did he..

Now that might sound a little harsh.. but it was SO funny!
Definitely made waking up fun this morning :P

lol thats fuckin awesome man

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Originally Posted by MyDadsACopStoner

lol thats fuckin awesome man

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Hehe, hey about your sig..

What'chu got? ;)

That is an awesome story.

That was great. Really. I would have been pissed if I got woke up early by ANYONE knocking on my door.

haha, maybe they wont come to your house anymore

YEAAHHH man!! that's the kind of thing i'd love to do but never have the chance to. Im so pissed when either the door or the fucking phone wakes me up before 12:00...

That'd be fucking awesome as a movie scene!!!! :cool:

you rock :thumbsup:

i think it would be funnier if he had pissed his pants

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Originally Posted by Billionfold

I think it would've been funnier if he was a police man and whooped your ass for assault, even though you did not do anything, and then you still get prison for it.

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Of course.

It would have been funnier if he pulled out a knife and acted eccentric too. Then you both have some sort of crazy contest to prove which one of you is crazier, but end up with a few bodies on your hands. You learn a lesson through your zany adventure, and become friends.

I'm pitching that to paramount.

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Originally Posted by graph

It would have been funnier if he pulled out a knife and acted eccentric too. Then you both have some sort of crazy contest to prove which one of you is crazier, but end up with a few bodies on your hands. You learn a lesson through your zany adventure, and become friends.

I'm pitching that to paramount.

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hahahahahaha That is GREAT! :D :D

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Originally Posted by Billionfold

It has to include titties and violence in at least 95% of the scenes.

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I thought I had made that clear in the description.

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Originally Posted by graph

It would have been funnier if he pulled out a knife and acted eccentric too. Then you both have some sort of crazy contest to prove which one of you is crazier, but end up with a few bodies on your hands. You learn a lesson through your zany adventure, and become friends.

I'm pitching that to paramount.

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Hahaha! Eccentric friends can certainly pull some unexpected shit together, like betraying each other at the same time in the end!

Just goes to show, you can take any situation and turn it into a bad adam sandler/ will ferrel movie.

What's funny is, I've done similar things to pizza men. I just don't get soliciter's around these parts.

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Originally Posted by graph

Just goes to show, you can take any situation and turn it into a bad adam sandler/ will ferrel movie.

What's funny is, I've done similar things to pizza men. I just don't get soliciter's around these parts.

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Hahah but man.. pizza men are your friends! They get you your munchies.. and here in Cali, they do it fast! About 80% of all pizza delivery cars I ever see is ALWAYS either 30miles over the speed limit or running a red light. How considerate of them!

It's just fun to mess around with people.. you never know what kind of reaction you're gonna get, and that's where the fun is for the attacker. It's always fun times for the victim too ;)

LOL


My dad tells a story similar to this.

On a saturday morning he was relaxing around the house and listing to some metal.

Well some jehovah's witnesses come to the door.

My dad answears with slayer blaring in the background in his boxers cleaning a huge skull and evil looking wizard, incense bruner.

Makes me lol.