Jesus... think about it!

This past Saturday, I went to a Catholic wedding. The wedding was actually really nice, but the thing that struck me, was the reading they did from the bible. It talks about Jesus going to a wedding and everybodyâ??s pissed because thereâ??s no wine left -and you know you canâ??t have a wedding without getting people fucked up. So Jesus turns some water into wine and saves the day. I personally think that the whole Jesus: son of God/superhero/miracle worker thing is the biggest sham in world history. I know that thereâ??s a chance that some of the events in the bible did actually take place, but the superhuman dogma with which theyâ??re presented, ie: Jesus healing lepers and the lame, makes it all bullshit to me.
Right after they did the reading, I remembered this story Iâ??d read a couple years back about how Jesus used a cannabis extract to â??healâ?� people. And if you think about what a cannabis extract would be, that would be some really fucking potent shit! I mean think about how strong vanilla extract is.
So Jesus was going around getting muthafuckas high as a muthafucka! Of course they thought he walked on water. And of course he fed a mass of people â?? no doubt with the munchies - some fucking rocks! He had crowds zooted everywhere he went! Effectively, Jesus and his weed carriers disciples were Cheech and 12 fucking Chongs.
So Iâ??m thinking about this wedding where he â??turned water to wineâ?�, and Iâ??m thinkingâ?¦ â??That sneaky muthafucka Jesus splashed his whole extract stash in some punch bowls and was like â??It ainâ??t really wine, but itâ??s real Jesus Juiceâ?¦ Bitches!â?� and turned the party out. If that wedding in the Bible actually took place, I have no doubt Jesus got them mutherfuckers high as hell on some dank chronic - not wine. And when Jesus died, people were pissed cuz Jerusalem's biggest weed pusher was out of the game. Think about it.

i feel yA

Agreed

the bible is all true what he did was real. plus you should be prazeing him for it is he who made cannabis that we all love think about

Uug...

HEY! that really offends me, im callin the cops.

Jesus? Oh I know him...He's that Mexican dude from down the block.

That's a funny pic!

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Originally Posted by Pulse

the bible is all true what he did was real. plus you should be prazeing him for it is he who made cannabis that we all love think about

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him who made cannabis??? dont think so mate

God made cannabis, not that jesus bloke.

Lmao exactly my thoughts

I'm sure there were other people that were going around getting people high, I don't think Jesus had a monopoly on Pot.

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Originally Posted by Pulse

the bible is all true what he did was real.

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That's some of the funniest shit I've ever heard...

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Originally Posted by beachguy in thongs

I'm sure there were other people that were going around getting people high, I don't think Jesus had a monopoly on Pot.

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Yeah, but Jesus was probably the main dealer for the middle east.

if a catholic priset hears you say that he
might be tempted to brab your balls and give you head
please be quiet when near church

jesus was a good teacher, just like buddah, they had good ideas, and values. people blow the whole religion thing WAY out of porportion. there is no "god" there is only the begining and the end.

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Originally Posted by LIP

God made cannabis, not that jesus bloke.

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Yeah but Jesus fronts it for him.

Word.

I made cannabis, prove that i didnt. Saying that God exists and made cannabis is just as impossible to proove as me saying that im god.

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Originally Posted by bedake

I made cannabis, prove that i didnt. Saying that God exists and made cannabis is just as impossible to proove as me saying that im god.

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I have proof. Here's me and Barney the Dinosaur, back before you were born, when we had electric cars and the speed limit was only 9 1/2 M.P.H.

Oh, we were cut out of the picture.

why do people always post these...just leave believers alone and fuck off, if you don't believe in God, ok good so be it but don't fucking rip on people that do...fucking ignorant asshole

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Originally Posted by da5mikeY

why do people always post these...just leave believers alone and fuck off, if you don't believe in God, ok good so be it but don't fucking rip on people that do...fucking ignorant asshole

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and why do people who believe in god always have to rip on us atheists by proclaiming everything in the bible to be true and we're all so wrong, blah blah blah.... oh yeah and fuck and shit and other profanities and such.....

people are gonna argue there's no god, just like other people will argue there is a god. While we're often told respecting other people's faith means quietly never questioning anything, there are those who aren't content to let their own theories go unheard because it dare contradict the established doctrine.

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Originally Posted by da5mikeY

why do people always post these...just leave believers alone and fuck off, if you don't believe in God, ok good so be it but don't fucking rip on people that do...fucking ignorant asshole

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So what if gods TRUE purpos was for everyone to be perma high and just obey god? Why would he of MADE the plant in the 1st place? then would it not make sence for his son to come down and teach about his dad and get people stoned? Here MY IDEA!!!! hehehe get ready.... :smokin: God makes the earth and his plain is to run it and have everyone work together and share.. Well he also created free will free thought and the option of Choice... Satin decided to fuck things up because he wanted to be Greedy he wanted all the people of the earth doing it his way..... So yeah God could Bleep him out of EXSISTANCE but would that not cause hella other angles and humans to think hey wait what makes him so wrong ? how could you just bleep a thought patter out you allowed him to have free choice and then going to distroy what he picked to do? So The TEACHER (god ) says ok you teach and do it your way... Satin fucking shit up and if you think about it our stages as a culture would have to come all the way up to this point at least for the test to be fully decided ( the internet and conection of thoughts is key for the proof) . then jesus is sent down to teach about god cause there nothing solid for us to go on befor that point there was not solid idea and there were tons of differnt idea of what the god or gods were like.... After this test for gods right to Bleep satin out of exsistance is over and it is proven that man nor satain could run things right ARMAGEDON comes everyone cept people who are being what is GREED will die off (it says that people will be brought back who died and after 1000 years of everyone being resurected satin will be allowed to crupt thos who have bad hearts and be Finaly Distroyed forever with all who followed him) makes sence that the people who didn't go throu armagedon would need to be tested .......and well all live perma High forever under a perfect type of comunizum... the reason why comunizum fails is the greed of a man or men takes from the people. God don't need nothing so if hes running shit well all be able to have a = share in the effort of labor and the benifet of all the produce... I CAN UNDERSTAND HOW THIS TEST WOULD make sence and need to be done. Thats my perception of shit:smokin:

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Originally Posted by Krogith

So what if gods TRUE purpos was for everyone to be perma high and just obey god? Why would he of MADE the plant in the 1st place? then would it not make sence for his son to come down and teach about his dad and get people stoned? Here MY IDEA!!!! hehehe get ready.... :smokin: God makes the earth and his plain is to run it and have everyone work together and share.. Well he also created free will free thought and the option of Choice... Satin decided to fuck things up because he wanted to be Greedy he wanted all the people of the earth doing it his way..... So yeah God could Bleep him out of EXSISTANCE but would that not cause hella other angles and humans to think hey wait what makes him so wrong ? how could you just bleep a thought patter out you allowed him to have free choice and then going to distroy what he picked to do? So The TEACHER (god ) says ok you teach and do it your way... Satin fucking shit up and if you think about it our stages as a culture would have to come all the way up to this point at least for the test to be fully decided ( the internet and conection of thoughts is key for the proof) . then jesus is sent down to teach about god cause there nothing solid for us to go on befor that point there was not solid idea and there were tons of differnt idea of what the god or gods were like.... After this test for gods right to Bleep satin out of exsistance is over and it is proven that man nor satain could run things right ARMAGEDON comes everyone cept people who are being what is GREED will die off (it says that people will be brought back who died and after 1000 years of everyone being resurected satin will be allowed to crupt thos who have bad hearts and be Finaly Distroyed forever with all who followed him) makes sence that the people who didn't go throu armagedon would need to be tested .......and well all live perma High forever under a perfect type of comunizum... the reason why comunizum fails is the greed of a man or men takes from the people. God don't need nothing so if hes running shit well all be able to have a = share in the effort of labor and the benifet of all the produce... I CAN UNDERSTAND HOW THIS TEST WOULD make sence and need to be done. Thats my perception of shit:smokin:

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and some fine and interesting shit you percieve:rasta: .

though call me anal, but I thought I'd point out in that whole article you've been talking about the evil devine rebel piece of clothing material known as "satin". "satan" is the spelling you're looking for.:p

:smokin: sounds like you at least go my theory =P i can;t spell for shit :smokin: or to lazy to correct my self ! :dance:

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Originally Posted by da5mikeY

why do people always post these...just leave believers alone and fuck off, if you don't believe in God, ok good so be it but don't fucking rip on people that do...fucking ignorant asshole

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I just thought it was funny :confused:
Im not trying to push a religion upon anyone, nor take their beliefs away. People can convert from Christianity to Islam (for example), but the beliefs that theyve grown up with since they were yeigh-hi will never be overshadowded.

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Originally Posted by MaryJaneintheCloset

That's a funny pic!

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yeah from first glance i thought the post was going to be something about how the crown is made from weed leafs or something lol.

God, I hate people that put others faith down. I do not have a religion and can give enough factual evidence to shoot down any religion thats out there. Whats important is that you believe in something and use that faith as motivation to better your life andthe life of those around you. I dont care if you worship Jesus, Buddha, or the fucking Pilsberry Doughboy, at least what you believe is true to you and it has made you a better person.

i think jesus was like buddah because he also saw why people suffer and everything.

In the begining begining...when Reptiles were big and violant!
God made marijuana to passify the great beasts that ate plants!
Also when the great beasts passed by and rubbed Marijuana by accedent, they would also be effected.
Over time these great beasts passed on, or were taken away to a place where they could live forever!
To make way for Humans!
Now the same plant can cause in Humans the same effects!
Non violance!
And this is what God wants!
All Humans to put back the plant/tree of knowledge to the center of the garden called Eden!...making amends for what happened with Adam and Eve, and the snake...
And stand sinless before him!...this isn't hard in its self, but the trick comes with the law God put down...engraven images on our money...Money in general is a idol before God!
And we all are using it, and giving it power!

Now we have war...and marijuana is outlawed round the world...wonder why?

Natural researchers have observed, regardless of their religious views,
That evolution could not have just "occured".

The simple fact: a single cell is irreducible, an unestimable number of critical chemical interactions, the absence of any of which would render it unviable to life.

So much for evolution.

I have observed that the athiest have allways screemed intolerance, when it is the people of faith that are finding their views under attack.

I question if Christions are going to the atheist threads to shit on them, via their posts.

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Originally Posted by braddog100

Natural researchers have observed, regardless of their religious views,
That evolution could not have just "occured".

The simple fact: a single cell is irreducible, an unestimable number of critical chemical interactions, the absence of any of which would render it unviable to life.

So much for evolution.

I have observed that the athiest have allways screemed intolerance, when it is the people of faith that are finding their views under attack.

I question if Christions are going to the atheist threads to shit on them, via their posts.

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You make absolutely no sense. Read a real book by a real scientist or thinker, and you might be shocked to find out that nothing is simple.

About Jesus' miracles, nobody knows that Horus, son of Osiris and Isis, had performed all of Jesus' supposed miracles about 3,000 years before Jesus was born.... It's in ancient Egyptian religion, accessible in any book. He did everything from walking on water, to changing water into wine, even down to raising Lazarus (Hebrew for Osiris) from the dead. Jesus did not exist as he is in the Bible.

I highly recommend this movie.
http://www.thegodmovie.com/dvd.php

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Originally Posted by F L E S H

You make absolutely no sense. Read a real book by a real scientist or thinker, and you might be shocked to find out that nothing is simple.

About Jesus' miracles, nobody knows that Horus, son of Osiris and Isis, had performed all of Jesus' supposed miracles about 3,000 years before Jesus was born.... It's in ancient Egyptian religion, accessible in any book. He did everything from walking on water, to changing water into wine, even down to raising Lazarus (Hebrew for Osiris) from the dead. Jesus did not exist as he is in the Bible.

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Egypt didn't exist 3000 yrs before Christ, also this material, if its' in every book, why haven't I seen it?

People can say and print anything, Your claim doesn't mean it occured.
Also, The acts of Christ and the Jewish history has been documented by numberous other cultures. Many ancient letters in Rome, many of which
are written many years prior on papiry.

There is a letter from Pilot to rome about the miricles of Jesus, In his secretarys handwriting. There are numberous documents, what do you think the scribes were doing?

In this specific letter it also mentioned that he was their when the Jews asked Jesus if they should pay taxes. He noted that "He seemed to have more respect for them than his own leaders".

It was then that Pilot gave Jesus full reighn to go and preach wherever he wanted, this is also why the Jewish leaders that hated him,... Dogged pilot about him.

Look I have nothing against the Jews. I am Jewish and a Christian.

Your facts are way Offffff.