Very Tough Night (long read)

Well, the New Year has come and I vowed to myself to do my self improvement plan. This includes:

1. Improvement in School - I am in 12th grade and I am failing 4 classes at the moment. Fortunately all of these classes are about 2 points from passing level, but I have never failed a course in my life and I really really want to go to college next year

2. Excercise - Haven't been doing too much lately, I used to work out all the time but I haven't had any time. I'm going to make time now.

3. Quitting Marijuana - I am officially going cold turkey on marijuana until April. I have been smoking nearly every day lately and it has really made me a lot less motivated, and I can tell that I am gaining a psychological dependence on the drug.

Anyways, today was the last day of my life as a marijuana smoker and I wanted to make it special. I called up my dealer and bought a half ounce, rolled it up into 2 blunts, a fat joint, a few bowls, and saved the rest for the bong my friend was letting me borrow. No one at my house was home all day long (like 9 AM until 12 at night) so I went commando.

Good weed is only better with good food, so I went to the grocery store and stocked up on all kinds of sweets and junk food, all of the stuff I have decided I will not eat anymore for awhile. Bought myself a 25$ New York Strip steak for dinner.

I woke up about 9:42 AM and it was crappy weather but I didn't care. All I wanted to do was make this day the best I could. I *literally* waked and baked with my joint, putting it right in my bedside droor and pulling it out when I woke up. I lit it up and it was great. I put on some Bob Marley and played a little xbox. I called up my friend about the bong and he said he would bring it over after work around 6. Anyways, I chilled for about an hour and decided to have some breakfast. My breakfast was an entire box (like 4 packs) of strawberry pop-tarts and some Eggo waffles.

After that I decided to let my food sit for awhile (I was stuffed) and then smoke a blunt. I listened to a bit of music and then when it was time, I brought out my first blunt, fruit punch by Ez-Roll (ezrolls are so delicious) and smoked it down. Now when you're alone and smoking an entire blunt, you get fucked up. Not just high, you get stupid. I was completely gone, laughing my ass off, and feeling absolutely great. I was listening to The Doors and singing along to Touch Me, screaming the words as loud as I possibly could when he says "Come on come on come on come on now..." and just having a great time. I realized that I forgot one of my favorite smoking methods, the gravity bong. I immediately went into the kitchen and got the materials I needed to make it. It was tough to make because I was pretty stoned but they aren't overwhelming. Once I was finished I put it in some water. I almost lit up the bowl when I remembered the ice cube method, so I went to the freezer and dumped 4 trays of ice into the pot that I put my GB in. Mixed it around a bit, the water was chillingly cold, and I took my hit. It felt like a ciggarette. I barely felt I needed to cough, the smoke was just a tingly feeling in the back of my throat. Now I was beyond high, I probably sat on my couch just thinking about things for an hour.

It was about 3 o clock and I watched a movie I got for christmas (The 40 Year Old Virgin) and laughed hysterically . For some reason, I wasn't even THINKING that I had to quit tommorow, I was just fully enjoying the blaze I was in.

After the movie ended my friend arrived. Iwas getting really really bored just being high by myself (it's always better to smoke with people for me) so I invited him in to smoke too. We loaded up his bong and it took us away, this thing is a beautiful 2 foot 3 chamber monster he calls Hurricane Jane (after Mary Jane obviously).

I asked him if he wanted to stay for dinner and he said why not, so we made the steaks and stuff, it was delicious.

So now it's about 8 o clock and he had to go, so I'm left all alone with enough weed for 3 bowls or so. I load up the first two and smoke them pretty fast, and finally I get to the last one. The last bowl I'll have for months. This was it. I grabbed my iPod and put on "The End" by The Doors which completely defined the mood I was in. I sat on my floor in the corner quietly enjoying my bowl with a lump the size of a baseball in my throat. I almost shed a tear.

It's very tough to know that you won't be able to smoke for the next few months and that you'll have to do schoolwork and lift weights a lot. It's not a fun life but it's definitely necessary.

Perhaps I'll take a few days from february break and smoke up, just so I don't go crazy.


P.S. If this post was stupid and pointless to you then I'm sorry, but I needed to let it out. Plus, I want to look back in April on this and see how I feel about it.

Light one up for me! This is going to be difficult :mad:

Nothing wrong with this, you wet out in a blaze of glory literally. Kudos for you seeing what you need to do in the up coming months and taking that step to make it happen. All the best my good man.

dude why do you have to make so mcuh of a deal about quitting. It cant be the sole reason that your failing etc. Why dont you just work a little harder and smoke up a little less. No need to stop totally.

You seemed to of found a crutch. Dont blame cannabis for your lack of motivation. Blame yourself. Cannabis is probably the last thing that unmotivates a person. Cannabis does however have the ability to expose those things that you are doing that really arent worthwhile.
Dont point to things that will get you the most sympathy for your fuck-ups.
If i were a prohibitionist i would print your story on all anti-cannabis websites. What a courageous person you are for finally admitting that cannabis is fucking up your life. gee whiz and wowie. fucking loser.
You get no sympathy from me.

dai*ma :D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by daima

You seemed to of found a crutch. Dont blame cannabis for your lack of motivation. Blame yourself. Cannabis is probably the last thing that unmotivates a person. Cannabis does however have the ability to expose those things that you are doing that really arent worthwhile.
Dont point to things that will get you the most sympathy for your fuck-ups.
If i were a prohibitionist i would print your story on all anti-cannabis websites. What a courageous person you are for finally admitting that cannabis is fucking up your life. gee whiz and wowie. fucking loser.
You get no sympathy from me.

dai*ma :D

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Why do you gotta be so hard on the kid? It's his decision. Maybe he doesn't want to find himself working for McDonalds 20 years from now still blazing everday cuz he didn't get the grades. He should be concentrating on math instead of what strain or junk food to try next then blaze after HS! Weed may be harmless but it does cause motivation loss in some. I hate you fucking pricks that think weed is perfect. It's great but know the facts ass.

Although my brother blazes all the time and he is acing in HS. Unforuntely I am like the dude above....I failed everything too :stoned:

Tough on the kid? please. We cannabis users have been hit over the head time after time with this type of handy when needed drugwar/marijuana war rhetoric. The fact is that even lazy ass losers end up using marijuana and when the times comes convenient they jump on the "pot made me do this, or stop me from doing that" bandwagon. Ya see. pot makes me very motivated. Especially motivated to put an end to the war on cannabis and those who use it.

dai*ma :D Dont blame me for my comments. Pot made me speak them.

im with daima on this one. hes right you cant let people stereotype pot smokers cause then they win and they lose.

focus on math? FYI, drugs/cannabis has taught a whole generation of americas kids the metric system. lmao.
That being said......, i believe that all people of the earth are entitled to my opinion. :dance:

To suggest that cannabis users will spend a life time working at Mc"ds is about as ignorant as any drug war rhetoric i have heard.
I wouldnt even eat a mc'ds, let alone work at one.

dai*ma

I think your resolution for the New Year is absolutely fabulous! Iâ??m going to cut back on my marijuana use as well, but Iâ??m not quitting because it obviously affects you in a completely different way than me. Herb helps me sleep! Therefore, I donâ??t necessary smoke to get high I smoke to sleep.

Although, I am in great shape already I have decided to start back up with daily yoga and mediation practice. I feel like when I practice those two things; I feel balanced/centered.

Life is hard, but life is hardest when you're dumb
You stop smoking pot, still inspiration never comes
with a negative IQ, you'll be lonesome sad and blue
life is hard, but life is hardest when you're dumb
The thoughts you have remain unheard
because you cannot find the words
life is hard, but life is hardest when you're dumb

Cheers to all of the people who have tried everything, who have put down everything, and have used everything for an excuse. May your path one day widen to looking at yourself.

dai*ma
My new years resolution is no different than the resolutions i have when i wake-up every day. I hope one day that i myself will be able to understand that the longer i work on a problem, the longer i keep the problem. :mad:

math, school and the like are only important because of the world we live in, you need math and school subjects to be passed to get a job and start pumpin money in to this shite. Weed mite be makin u think, what is the fuckin point? (a very good one) and you're goin against this because u feel its not the way. well bollox to it man, do whatever the fuck u want, workin in mcd's is no different than workin for sum corporate company that fucks u daily with there procedures, (other than the money, but if you got the green, for food and water then wha are you whinin about?) your life plays a very small part in the meanin of anythin, shame aint it? but if you think quittin weed will influence ure grades, it probly will, but don't think u are workin towards anythin that means something (cuz any job, that involves anything to do with cultural needs, means fuck all, except to those within the culture at the time) then yes go with the 2.4 kids, the house, the wife, and you with a fukin good job (40k plus a year) then go for it, if thats what u think is gonna make you happy, but u gotta realise that weed was not standin in ure way, jus the thoughts u were thinkin while bein stoned, and thoughts are not bought on by any drug(s).

Nicely said but I didn't say weed would make him work at McDonalds. I am just saying concentrating on school is very importmant. If HE thinks it is getting in the way, then it is. Even if it isn't. Other things can also fuck things up. Not just weed. I was just speaking in general.

And besides...there is nothing wrong with working at McDonalds. Some people have higher ambitions though. Sorry if I offended anyone.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by daima

Blame yourself. Cannabis is probably the last thing that unmotivates a person.

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Wow. How can you really say that? I mean, you DO know your wrong right???

Okay, woah, I must've worded something very badly, because daima you have it all wrong! Did you miss the part where I said that I was quitting until April? I have to be honest daima, I think about many many things but the same thought reoccurs to me almost every hour of every day I have lived since I habitually started smoking. Do I have any green, and if so, when am I going to smoke it? This thought wasn't there before. Perhaps weed doesn't have this effect on you, or perhaps you don't mind it, but I do. Getting high is no longer special to me and that is why I am quitting for a little while, getting it all out of my system so I can really enjoy it when I smoke again.

I never said weed was the cause of my bad grades. I am the cause of my bad grades.

I put that in bold because somehow you got that idea in your head and I don't want you to have that. Weed has certainly become a prime factor for happiness in my life and things arent happy and good when I don't have a stash to go home to. I get very bored and lazy when I don't have any pot, and even lazier when I'm really high. This is just me by the way. I have a very addictive personality unfortunately, but luckily I also have a lot of willpower when I want to.

I hope now that you can understand why I am quitting for awhile.

yes GanjaASD I am beginning my workouts for the same reason, it makes one feel great to eat right and excercise, the body is more energetic and a vigorous workout before bed makes being asleep so nice :D

well there u go! u didn't make this post for any reason in particular and now you know why u wanna quit, for your own personal beliefs, that no1 can argue against. You ever thought that school and workin out is something u jus don't like to do? cuz if u lazy anyway (whatever lazy means) and weed makes you lazier, maybe you just don't think its worth the effort.

Jimmi it's something that I don't want to do, but when I'm done, I feel really glad that I did it. That's what keeps me coming back. I get basically the same feeling from finishing a big assignment I would've just said "fuck it" to as I get from breaking my limit in a benchpress. Just a good feeling of accomplishing something.

I think that if I made weed a reward (finish a big paper, smoke a spliff; have a long and tiring run, break out the bowl and don't have anything but fruit for munchies) then I can actually use it to fuel my self-improvements. Still, I'm going to take a month or so off just so the next time I smoke I'll be blitzed out of my mother fucking skull :rasta:

That's so awesome man! Guys gotta quit hating on him. I wish the best of luck to you man, it's really hard quitting for a month (It's brain melting to wait till April).

Dai'ma, I'm sorry, we just don't all share you're unique personality. We're not talking about ending the war on weed, just about pixel taking a break! RELAX MAN :rasta:

p.s. I was gonna get a job at Mickey D's ;)

FUCKING AWESOME DAY, man, i did sumthing like that the day i decided to quit, except it was the last day of music midtown, I smoked like a quarter during public enemy, so much good food at that place, ive been clean for like 8 months now, i feel ok, and wen i thought my friends would ditch me for quitting, they didnt, they even kinda look up to me that i quit, 2 of my friends quit coz of me too ;p, of course i didnt quit forever, i just need a little hiatus since it is my senior yr in high school, and its easier to get the hotter girls wen they know u dont smoke mj and they know that you quit, it kinda turns em on. but u know wat? after i graduate me n my buddies r making a trip to germany, party there during the world cup, ill b doing coke, x, and acid in germany, ill be hitting the clubs wen im on x, and then after 2 weeks in germany taking a train to, (drum roll) AMSTERDAM, yea, hitting up all the coffeeshops and smart shops for shrooms and purple haze. just dont quit forever and know wen to quit, i respect the ppl that quit forever though, good decision

Smonking weed will not get you a job at mcdonalds, they drug test there (at least in IL) lol, anyways Pixel I do give you props on trying to fix your life back up, and having ambition, if you quit, it is your choice, but your post does coincide with the bullshit propaganda that commercials have been telling america for years. The weed did not put a gun to your head telling you no to work harder, pot is more like an enhancer, if you were lazy, and you smoked, you will get lazier. Thats about it, I do agree with Daima, you can't use pot as a crutch, Smokin is a hobby, and a hobby should remain a hobby, it shouldn't interfere with your school work unless you allow it to.

god dammit my computer sucks, and my high ass didn't read what you wrote pixel so sorry, my bad, but anyways yeah thats my take in general, don't take it as I'm bashing on you for quitting, ultimately its your decision, good luck, and mad props on going out in style

good 4 u dude if u can pull this off that will be a great thing. fuck diama weed does affect some people that way, i do bad in school when i smoke during the weekdays cuz i will get high instead of doing homework, so my new years resolution which i actually started around christmas is to only smoke on weekends. its worked so far

Daima isn't all that wrong, though a little extreme.

I can't remember, anyways. :stoned:

It takes time to break up herb and smoke it, which is enough time to hamper your college-level work. But you could get through it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kryzco

Smonking weed will not get you a job at mcdonalds, they drug test there (at least in IL) lol, anyways

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Ha Ha Ha, you're right! :smokin:

Good shit.