As the tears fall beneath my eyes...

You know.. funny how life works out for you, i am so depressed right now it is unreal. I just feel like running and never stopping, I am now starting to pack my shit, and i am going to move out of here. where will i go?? Im not sure right now i am just settled on getting everything in my car. i wrote a thread last night when i was drunk about what happen but i dont think it ever went through...


I came home from probably one of the best nights iv had. Angelina (bong) is gone. I thought i was just triping i was drunk off my ass, stoned. Then i go to grab my bag, and it is also gone. My grandmother came through and took everything. She said she smashed it :(:( That bong has been with me through so much shit, through my mothers death. I would also smoke with her at my own grandmothers house wer ei am at now. she never cared then.. I never ever smoked when she was awake, or around I kept that secret from her because if i didnt this is what would happen every fucking day. Some old lady going through my shit. I hope she enjoy all the porno in the dresser. Confronting her didnt do anything. It only made matters worse. So here i am feeling like shit, with tears... God just please save me....


Edit: And to top it off the one place i would want to go to i cant... i broke up with my girl yesterday.. she went through my phone and found messages from a friend.. now im not sure if i even still have a best friend... if i could go back in time and change some things i so would...that feeling of being lonely is now creeping up on me...

Edit2-And so you guys know my grandmother is the type the whole family talks about. the one that spoils everything. She lives her life her way the way she wants. I would understand if she just asked me to no longer smoke here thats fine.. id rather smoke on a walkk anyways. but im gone now.. what will i tell my sister?? oh god things just keep pilling up..

how the fuck do you spell pillling?? fuck it

Riiiiight. I think I'll go watch a moo-vie.

i dont know about you.. but i dont have much i never have.. but i will some day. I am going to continue packings.. i seriously didnt need your righttttt comment.... righttttt back at cha buddy.. later

Sheesh that sucks big time... but hey you'll eventually get over it, and you know what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.

So you're leaving because your grandma took your bong and bag?

Not a good reason to leave. That just shows she cares, and that's a lot more than what most people have.

Get a new bong, a new bag, and find a better hiding spot. You don't think this is slightly irrational to leave home over marijuana?

You'll get over it.

its not the weed.. i know i can get more, its the fact she invaded me more then twice now. went through all my shit, left it messy as hell. She could of just talked to me like a person. And i would of said okay im sorry, it wont happen again, still have my bong just relocate it. I should of never moved back home... just closer to home i guess. Im going to save up some money and get my own place. I just wish she accepted me for who i am, and realizes that im doing well. And im far from rock bottom. She also said its not the weed its the fact that its illegal, and i understand that, like i said... it wasn't just about the weed.. I just smoked my last joint.. calm me down.. and made me think about everything.. crazy what you think when your mad....

That's not depressed. Although losing your mother is. But even that is just the way life works
Marijuana and homes with authority sometimes don't work well together. But, luckily for you, the choices are simple.

Lie better
Stop smoking
live on your own.

i'm facing similar trials right now.

it's life bro.

ummm... why does everyone always insist im a bro??? check the profile..

yo blazin, it might be a better idea to put up with her shite for a week or two until your 100% certian of what you want to do and have everything planned out properly. Getting up and leaving like that might just make things alot worse for you, I know it will be a cunt having to put up with that shit but who knows what you'll have to put up with if you just leave now

:thumbsup: i hear you...

ummmm im sorry for assuming your a "bro". Which was just an expression.
but i assumed you were male because you mentioned your "girl breaking up with you". and i don't usually check people profiles....im sorry for offending you.

you did not offend me.. no harm done.. i was just saying.. i find it funny.. some of the girls on here state their a girl in their sig. maybe i should start to do that lol..

Quote:

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Originally Posted by BlAzInIt4:20

You know.. funny how life works out for you, i am so depressed right now it is unreal. I just feel like running and never stopping, I am now starting to pack my shit, and i am going to move out of here. where will i go?? Im not sure right now i am just settled on getting everything in my car. i wrote a thread last night when i was drunk about what happen but i dont think it ever went through...


I came home from probably one of the best nights iv had. Angelina (bong) is gone. I thought i was just triping i was drunk off my ass, stoned. Then i go to grab my bag, and it is also gone. My grandmother came through and took everything. She said she smashed it :(:( That bong has been with me through so much shit, through my mothers death. I would also smoke with her at my own grandmothers house wer ei am at now. she never cared then.. I never ever smoked when she was awake, or around I kept that secret from her because if i didnt this is what would happen every fucking day. Some old lady going through my shit. I hope she enjoy all the porno in the dresser. Confronting her didnt do anything. It only made matters worse. So here i am feeling like shit, with tears... God just please save me....


Edit: And to top it off the one place i would want to go to i cant... i broke up with my girl yesterday.. she went through my phone and found messages from a friend.. now im not sure if i even still have a best friend... if i could go back in time and change some things i so would...that feeling of being lonely is now creeping up on me...

Edit2-And so you guys know my grandmother is the type the whole family talks about. the one that spoils everything. She lives her life her way the way she wants. I would understand if she just asked me to no longer smoke here thats fine.. id rather smoke on a walkk anyways. but im gone now.. what will i tell my sister?? oh god things just keep pilling up..

how the fuck do you spell pillling?? fuck it

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This may seem like a dumb question, but how is your relationship with her? Is she the only one you live with?

i feel your pain sometimes the straw can break the camels back.

cool down and tap into that zen state of being at peace with all issues in your life, helps my issues alot

All this means is you'll have to take a stroll when you want to toke

my relationship with her is terrible always have been. Its my little sister and I, plus gma.

It could be worse. Thats the saying that gets me through my day.

Saying "it could be worse" isn't going to help her. Comparing her problem to something that cannot possibly! compare (i.e Afghanistan) will not help her.

Give advice or fuck off, she's got a lot of shit going on in her life this obviously wasn't the only thing that's making her upset.

Check your rep, hon. <3

When they tell her to think of it as "it could always be worse", that's advice. Things like that can get people out of ruts they might be stuck in. A lot of it is how you feel, its just a way to look at things differently. I might work, it might not, but you can't say if you're not the person who would be taking advice. Just to think about it, no hostility here.

Sorry things are going so shitty for you. Try and keep your head up the best you can.

Whenever I'm in a shitty situation, I try and shrug it off. Things are the way they and I can't change it so I just deal with it. Of course I'll feel down, but I find if you look at things optimistically, you move past them faster and save a lot of stress. If you can, try it.

Try and sit back and just relax for an hour or two, just let your mind and soul think. Listen to some music, do some exercise, do something where you can just mentally unwind. After you've cleared your head, just try and think of what things you have to take care of, like figuring out where you're gonna stay, temporary first, or if you need to get a job or something. Just give yourself a plan. Take it easy and one step at a time. Fix your situation. I think if you get settled again and have all this cleared up you can move on and put it behind you.

Some optimism for start, just think that times like these you can really see who pulls through for you and who's there for you. These are the people that are true friends and you should never take these people for granted. This will help you see that. It will really make your relationship with these people stronger. Trust me this will make you happier. Just seeing these people should lighten your heart.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by BlAzInIt4:20

ummm... why does everyone always insist im a bro??? check the profile..

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I read your profile and noticed that you said that you were a "down chick".

Let me rest my head on you. I need some new pillows. 'Ooh, I like silk!'

maybe get a lock on your door with a key?

cheer up! :) bongs go, weed gets smoked, but your still alive to get a new bong and smoke more weed. you are not so bad off. weed is expensive where i live! now thats scary.
treat yourself to a nice new tube and a fat sack. :thumbsup:

Im sorry that shit happened, hun... trust me I know how that fucked up shit goes.. you dont even want to know some of the things Ive thought when angry about that kind of shit. I dont know how I have been able to stay composed and keep swallowing all the shit I have been, but I somehow have managed. Probably because my favorite word is "fuggit." It helps alot.

haha i've went through the same stuff with my grandfather, I was living in his attic for awhile when I left the parents home, he found my stuff a couple times, I got really pissed about him invading my privacy and stuff, but when it came down to it, all he cares about is me and what I'm gonna do with my life. He didn't kick me out or anything, just told me to do it away from his house, because he's too old to get arrested for something that his grandson is doing illegally. Don't move out the real world is allot more scary than you think, and your grandma just cares about you, you should go apologize to her for bringing it into her house and start over, trust me if she didn't kick you out she still cares for you allot and you should appreciate her while shes still around, don't take it for granted.

I dont think that losing your bong is the end of the world. It sounds to me like there may be other issues in your life causing you to feel this way. Just set back. Smoke a joint. And refuse to let yourself get down in the dumps.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kenji1121

haha i've went through the same stuff with my grandfather, I was living in his attic for awhile when I left the parents home, he found my stuff a couple times, I got really pissed about him invading my privacy and stuff, but when it came down to it, all he cares about is me and what I'm gonna do with my life. He didn't kick me out or anything, just told me to do it away from his house, because he's too old to get arrested for something that his grandson is doing illegally. Don't move out the real world is allot more scary than you think, and your grandma just cares about you, you should go apologize to her for bringing it into her house and start over, trust me if she didn't kick you out she still cares for you allot and you should appreciate her while shes still around, don't take it for granted.

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iv been in the real world... more then you will ever know...

and thanks everyone for being so nice:thumbsup:

i am a tad depressed but my birthday is rolling around and for some reason around all holidays i get depressed. I am on meds, i take them but i dont like to, they make me feel ugh no emotions not even happiness. That is why i smoke, i seem to turn into this person that loves everything and appreciates the colors of the world. And i dont even get angry. I seem to have a short fuse, im not sure what triggered it, i wasn't always like this, but maybe years of physical abuse could of had something to do with it, or maybe years of drug abuse also. Who knows all i know is that im doing my best to be me. And an update on gma i wrote her a letter explaining that i understand were shes coming from. I also gave her my background on my smoking like how long, who i smoked with (mom). And i also asked her to accept me for who i am, and know in her heart that i am to determined in life to have weed get the best of me. I gave her a hug and kissed her on the cheek...