Anyone ever feel like giving up?

Honestly,

Even my sisters boss, whos only met me ONCE, told her that it would had been better for me never to of been born.

All through my Sophmore and Freshman year of highschool I had no friends, and my old friends would surround me in the hall everyday and tell me to kill myself because noone liked me, and theyd follow me to church *the only place to find my soul untied* and they jumped me...and burned me with lighters.

My friend I had for 14 years told me she couldnt be my friend anymore because I wasnt Christian enough...

My mom used to tell me from like age 3-11 that if she were to die it would be my fault...

My grandma before she died told me she tried to kill me when I was a baby but Grandpa wouldnt let her...maybe it was the meds...but I was 10 and those were big words that still echo in my ears..

I feel like everything is on me...actually, I dont know...I cant even explain the feeling...it hurts though...and I just wish I could be someone else...I hate me...and everything about me...

Everyone at school thinks Im always happy because I love putting on smiles for people...to see them smile...and it always makes me chuckle when someone comments about how happy I always am..

I dont know why I am posting this...I just am...I need to get everything out somewhere...and being that I really have noone to vent to...Im going to on the net...sorry

'bout the only thing I can tell ya is that, through my experience, worry about yourself first and others come second. I mean, your all you have and all you can rely on, so why not take care of that first? Everyone else (except maybe the closest of family) are a dime a dozen.

Last winter I was pretty down, and was doing some not so cool shit to escape me reality. Tons of DXM, booze, herb, powder, pills, mushies, you name it I was doing it. Usually mixing at least 3 a night. Every night. For months. I finally quit the boozin and hardcore shit, and took a step back to look at my life. I disregarded my emotions and tried to objectively determine who I was becoming, what I wanted to become, where I wanted to go in life and where I was heading. That really woke me up, I mean I'm not perfect or anything, but I really allowed myself to come to some truths and come to some peace with myself for the first time in a long time. I'm not sure of a lot still, and I'm veyr confused about who I really am (cliche, I know, but fuck it!), but at least I know what I need to do now in order to get anywhere.

I guess I'm just saying when the skies look the darkest, try to step back and look at things through a third person, try to see what's really in front of you beyond what your feeling. Its hard and takes practice, but kind of like mediation, it can be an immesely rewarding skill :)

Look, you know who you are. People try to bring you downw ith words but its just they are too weak themselves so they feel to pick on somebody else. Your parents, friends, and your sisters boss just seem liek they have something against you because maybe they know your better than they are. From what im hearing from you my dear is that you are very strong and you do not deserve the things that has happend to you and said twards you. One day you will be in heaven and they will be in hell. Then you will see that all those smiles you try to put on others faces will become your smiles. Your young and you have the rest of your life to show these people who you really are deep inside and I believe you can do anything, Your beautiful because your you. Never stop believing in yourself!

let me add my two cents, you sound like a strong person, i agree with budmail, don't worry about other people saying crap to hurt you. you need to surround yourself with people that make you feel good. you have made it this far it would'nt make sense to give up. if you need to unload your thoughts you have friends on this board.

Nevermind.

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Originally Posted by clevemire

Man the teenagers here are depressing.
"I hate myself. Life sucks. <Insert random teenage whine here>."
I have the same advice for all of you. That advice is to hang in there. When you kids get a bit older, you'll get out of the "whole world hates me and I hate it" phase. You teenies haven't seen anything yet. Trust me.

Yeah, I know it's my fault for clicking on this thread. I gotta stop reading these posts.
Total buzzkill.

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my exact thoughts cleve

See, I shouldnt even post here because It just ruins shit, fuck it, fuck it all

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Originally Posted by Cheeched Chick HiGh

See, I shouldnt even post here because It just ruins shit, fuck it, fuck it all

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cheeched, theyre probably just jealous coz theyre not hot and/or blonde LOL

cleve's right though (even though he didnt want us to see the post he made lol).. im 17, too, and occasionally I feel like that, too.. It sucks, but you gotta realize them for what they are - just feelings. Alot of the feelings youre having will go away, just dissapear, when you're older, coz hey, we're still kids lol

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Originally Posted by GHoSToKeR

cleve's right though (even though he didnt want us to see the post he made lol)

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LOL. I gotta be a little quicker about keeping things to myself. :rolleyes: I tried, but novice is too quick like a ninja.

But yeah in all honesty... Life seems overbearingly rough when you're a kid. I know. Just give it time. If you make the right decisions now, you'll grow out of it. That goes for all of you chilluns out there:D;)

I've got to learn to bite my tongue, too, Cleve. I was gonna post something and I'm glad I didn't. :o

Life gets better when you're out of the house and on your own. On the same hand, with responsibility, life just gets harder, sorry to sound pessimistic but you have to learn how to deal. All I see are needy pleas and no steps made to improve youself. You can do it, Cheeched....and I'm already hot and blonde (hehe) ;) so it's not jealousy speaking here, it's life experience. :)

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Originally Posted by GHoSToKeR

cheeched, theyre probably just jealous coz theyre not hot and/or blonde LOL

cleve's right though (even though he didnt want us to see the post he made lol).. im 17, too, and occasionally I feel like that, too.. It sucks, but you gotta realize them for what they are - just feelings. Alot of the feelings youre having will go away, just dissapear, when you're older, coz hey, we're still kids lol

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some very wise words.
i commend you.
sorry cleve, i should of deleted that quote of yours
i reread this thread and realized it was gone :(

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Originally Posted by notanovice

sorry cleve, i should of deleted that quote of yours
i reread this thread and realized it was gone :(

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No harm done, my friend.
It's all good :)

i was gonna do a serious post but i felt like giving up

why give up? because somebody else thinks you're not christian enough? who makes them right?

all these people, they have their own issues to deal with...and it seems that they are taking out their frustrations on you. while this does suck, you've handled it quite well...instead of retaliating, you've accepted the burden and kept it to yourself. now you just have to learn to say no once in a while; the only power these people have over you is the power you give them.

take a step back, and look at the bigger picture; you're healthy, you're alive, and you've got your whole life ahead of you. now is not the time to be worried aboot what other people think of you. you should worry aboot what YOU think of you; they'll either accept you for who you are, or they'll drift out of your life. either way, you win.

atleast you've got a really cute face

Come on cheech... What you need to do is realise that you have done nothing wrong... Maybe you've stolen something at one time, or u've made fun of someone... but nothing worth dying for..

JUST REALIZE THIS; The only wrong thing that you have done is beleive these assholes. Those people deserve to burn in hell for a long time. And dont call any of those people your friends, because a real friend would never do anything like that.

My advice, Ignore all the assholes and find a new group of friends... don't worry about how other's see you, look deeply into yourself and you'll see that you're a good person, you're beautiful, and you have your entire life ahead of you...
So Turn your life into what you want, Fuck evryone else

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Originally Posted by Reefer Rogue

i was gonna do a serious post but i felt like giving up

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I think im the only one that caught this :p...hahahahaha ur just to damn funny:D

Anyways yes cheeced I feel that way alot to, but all u can do is brush it off, say fuck it and move on to bigger and better things> I have come to the conculsion recently that there is nothing anyone else can do to help u. U are the decideing factor in ur life and ur life is what u choose to make it. Even tho at times things dont seem easy and u feel like give up just pick urself back up take a good look in the mirrior and say "today im goin to make a better day then yesterday" Then find away to make it a better day. Dont worry about what people have to say about u trust me its soooooooo not worth it. I use to care but now fuck it and fuck anyone that dont like me, if i dont like myself then nothing else anyone says really matters its just a cover up to hide myself. Anyways u are a beauitful gurl and im sure u know it or u wouldnt post pics of urself on boards if u had low self esteem. u know ur beautiful and ur crative as well. U have a few things goin for u bulid on them and stop lookin at the negitive.:)




anyways on to the happy thread again because i feel happy :D:D


*skips along to the happy thread singing lalalalala im so happy ohh so happy!!!

cheech, i no how u feel, just ignore it and move on. life isnt always against you and just try ur best to enjoy it. if u need someone to talk to email me at [email protected] and ill give u my sn and we can talk. just try to keep going and dont over react and do somethin stupid.

Just remember, shit may seem bad now, they'll always be assholes, jerks offs, as you get older, it's inevitable. You can't let these people consume your soul, cherish your life, because it may be hard to see now, but everything is good in the end. Life is beautiful, dig deep into your soul and you'll find happiness, don't deny yourself of it. Don't worry, be happy :)

lmfao@cleve and MJM
:rolleyes:
You guys!!!:D

But yeah, there ya go.....*looks at disclaimer*......
Nah, better not..
*wanders off*

It seems you have overcome so much in life why give up know?

everyone goes through a time in life where they feel like everything is bullshit and nothing good ever comes their way. the only difference is that some hide it better then others. just stick it out for a while b4 u give up on life, cause basicaly all anyone realy has in life is their own life. and all these people who been fuckin wit you, jus let them know u wont put up wit their shit.


and heres a little tip, when shit hits tha fan or u fuck up bad or something beyond repair, move away and start over. u can alwayse go back when shit settles down a lil and people arent so self absorbed.

take it easy and i hope u start feelin better,
peace n' bagz,
kronik

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everyone goes through a time in life where they feel like everything is bullshit and nothing good ever comes their way.

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Smart man, Kronik

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Originally Posted by Budmail

Your only 17 ?

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So's Cheech and Bogart and Omun and so on. Well, not all 17, but pretty close. So yeah.. Lots of kiddies here. :D:p

ITS NOT THE COST OF HIGH LIVING ITS THE COST OF LIVING HIGH, NEVER WORRY ABOUT LIFE COS U WONT MAKE IT OUT ALIVE ANYWAY!

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Originally Posted by Budmail

Your only 17 ?

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Errr, yeah, I am..

Did I do something wrong!?!? :confused: :o

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Originally Posted by Budmail

Your only 17 ?

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Originally Posted by GHoSToKER

Errr, yeah, I am..

Did I do something wrong!?!?:confused: :o

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*says nothing....wanders off*

;)

man fuck those people they arent ur friends just find the kids at ur school even if people think that they are out cast that are genuinly nice and kick it with them thats what i've done and i'd take that over being popular anyday

plus ur eally pretty i'd be greatful to kick it with u whats ur IM we can talk if u want

Wow thats totoally understandable at 17.

I sure harbour my own insecurites and loads of nagging thought now and agian. Fuck we all have times of trial for sure!

To give up at 17 is nuts. No way girl. I don't care if your a fucking troll, pick up an instrument. Seriosuly if you pick up a bass and put an add in the paper or put posters up at local school mentioning you play and instrument, and are looking for a band. If your a hot blond, things will go quicker. But fucking i don't know what to say really.
But at 17 you got soo many possibilities ahead of you!

Try some "Rage Against the Machine". Go for some Metallica (good first song is Fuel), Guns and Roses, good stuff like that (as someone not long ago told me). Pink
Floyd is amazing to listen to. You don't need to go out every weekend to be cool. Man it's all about whats going on in your head. If you feeling insecure because nobody invited you to party for the past 5 months. We'll mabe you should change your values. Real easy to do when the media tells you to be who your not ehh?

Do you consider yourself cool. It's in the eye of the beholder. From what i know I think your cool. Mabe you embelish things a bit. But does that really matter? Take pride in yourself!!! Your specail!!!

It's easy for people to say "buck up", especailly when their not you. But remember they only know what your showing them. And you only showing them that your insecure. Show us something more. Try a hobbie, build sense of identity and be proud of it!


I PLAY BEGINER GUITAR. But my " Saints go Marching In, and Jingle Bells" SOUND AWESOME!!!!

If you ever need someone to chat with.
**Behold!!** I am [email protected]
or @gmail.ca. I'm not sure.