Anyone ever feel like giving up?

[Cheeched Chick HiGh]

Honestly,

Even my sisters boss, whos only met me ONCE, told her that it would had been better for me never to of been born.

All through my Sophmore and Freshman year of highschool I had no friends, and my old friends would surround me in the hall everyday and tell me to kill myself because noone liked me, and theyd follow me to church *the only place to find my soul untied* and they jumped me...and burned me with lighters.

My friend I had for 14 years told me she couldnt be my friend anymore because I wasnt Christian enough...

My mom used to tell me from like age 3-11 that if she were to die it would be my fault...

My grandma before she died told me she tried to kill me when I was a baby but Grandpa wouldnt let her...maybe it was the meds...but I was 10 and those were big words that still echo in my ears..

I feel like everything is on me...actually, I dont know...I cant even explain the feeling...it hurts though...and I just wish I could be someone else...I hate me...and everything about me...

Everyone at school thinks Im always happy because I love putting on smiles for people...to see them smile...and it always makes me chuckle when someone comments about how happy I always am..

I dont know why I am posting this...I just am...I need to get everything out somewhere...and being that I really have noone to vent to...Im going to on the net...sorry

Cheeched Chick HiGh Reviewed by Cheeched Chick HiGh on 12-16-2004. Anyone ever feel like giving up? Honestly, Even my sisters boss, whos only met me ONCE, told her that it would had been better for me never to of been born. All through my Sophmore and Freshman year of highschool I had no friends, and my old friends would surround me in the hall everyday and tell me to kill myself because noone liked me, and theyd follow me to church *the only place to find my soul untied* and they jumped me...and burned me with lighters. My friend I had for 14 years told me she couldnt be my friend Rating: 5

[Buck268]

'bout the only thing I can tell ya is that, through my experience, worry about yourself first and others come second. I mean, your all you have and all you can rely on, so why not take care of that first? Everyone else (except maybe the closest of family) are a dime a dozen.

Last winter I was pretty down, and was doing some not so cool shit to escape me reality. Tons of DXM, booze, herb, powder, pills, mushies, you name it I was doing it. Usually mixing at least 3 a night. Every night. For months. I finally quit the boozin and hardcore shit, and took a step back to look at my life. I disregarded my emotions and tried to objectively determine who I was becoming, what I wanted to become, where I wanted to go in life and where I was heading. That really woke me up, I mean I'm not perfect or anything, but I really allowed myself to come to some truths and come to some peace with myself for the first time in a long time. I'm not sure of a lot still, and I'm veyr confused about who I really am (cliche, I know, but fuck it!), but at least I know what I need to do now in order to get anywhere.

I guess I'm just saying when the skies look the darkest, try to step back and look at things through a third person, try to see what's really in front of you beyond what your feeling. Its hard and takes practice, but kind of like mediation, it can be an immesely rewarding skill

[Darkneon420]

Look, you know who you are. People try to bring you downw ith words but its just they are too weak themselves so they feel to pick on somebody else. Your parents, friends, and your sisters boss just seem liek they have something against you because maybe they know your better than they are. From what im hearing from you my dear is that you are very strong and you do not deserve the things that has happend to you and said twards you. One day you will be in heaven and they will be in hell. Then you will see that all those smiles you try to put on others faces will become your smiles. Your young and you have the rest of your life to show these people who you really are deep inside and I believe you can do anything, Your beautiful because your you. Never stop believing in yourself!

[florida boy 3]

let me add my two cents, you sound like a strong person, i agree with budmail, don't worry about other people saying crap to hurt you. you need to surround yourself with people that make you feel good. you have made it this far it would'nt make sense to give up. if you need to unload your thoughts you have friends on this board.

[clevemire]

Nevermind.

[notanovice]

Man the teenagers here are depressing.
"I hate myself. Life sucks. <Insert random teenage whine here>."
I have the same advice for all of you. That advice is to hang in there. When you kids get a bit older, you'll get out of the "whole world hates me and I hate it" phase. You teenies haven't seen anything yet. Trust me.

Yeah, I know it's my fault for clicking on this thread. I gotta stop reading these posts.
Total buzzkill.

my exact thoughts cleve

[Cheeched Chick HiGh]

See, I shouldnt even post here because It just ruins shit, fuck it, fuck it all

[GHoSToKeR]

See, I shouldnt even post here because It just ruins shit, fuck it, fuck it all

cheeched, theyre probably just jealous coz theyre not hot and/or blonde LOL

cleve's right though (even though he didnt want us to see the post he made lol).. im 17, too, and occasionally I feel like that, too.. It sucks, but you gotta realize them for what they are - just feelings. Alot of the feelings youre having will go away, just dissapear, when you're older, coz hey, we're still kids lol

[clevemire]

cleve's right though (even though he didnt want us to see the post he made lol)

LOL. I gotta be a little quicker about keeping things to myself. I tried, but novice is too quick like a ninja.

But yeah in all honesty... Life seems overbearingly rough when you're a kid. I know. Just give it time. If you make the right decisions now, you'll grow out of it. That goes for all of you chilluns out there

[maryjanemama]

I've got to learn to bite my tongue, too, Cleve. I was gonna post something and I'm glad I didn't.

Life gets better when you're out of the house and on your own. On the same hand, with responsibility, life just gets harder, sorry to sound pessimistic but you have to learn how to deal. All I see are needy pleas and no steps made to improve youself. You can do it, Cheeched....and I'm already hot and blonde (hehe) so it's not jealousy speaking here, it's life experience.