Just me, or was this guy an asshole? (sort of long)

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Originally Posted by hewhispers

i think that you're smart enough not to lower yourself to violence.
it only makes you look weak, like you didn't have the intelligence to handle him properly. obviously thats not you or you would have already.

Here's a general rule: if you say nothing when he says or does something stupid, you are, in essence, giving him permission to continue his behavior.

You need to lay down he law, especially when its your place.
Ive never been an in-your-face type of person but I will let people know that they have to behave like a human and respect the house if they wish to stay.
"And if you cant do that, you have to go? "Are we clear?" And dont let him off the hook until he says "yes", because most will say "just kidding'. To me, thats not good enough (which may be my own problem) Basically its like making them say "uncle". I want to know that you are going to agree with what I want in my home or you got to go.

Going forward (if there is a next time) let your friend who brought him relay what you expect of everyone that comes over. (shame on your friend for not doing this already)

You can call him on stupid shit. "Oh I remember her, is she dead yet?"
You danced over his stupid question. I would not have. I would have said something like "Do you always ask stupid questions like that? Something that tells him that you don't appreciate shit questions like that.

Good luck

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If people are THAT horrible and insultive, i dont think words work. You need to SHOW him how you feel.

Im not saying violence is right, and tbh i hate fighting, but some people cant be talked to. People like him will answer the questions with more childish crap that no one wants to hear.

he seems spoiled to me.. like a 10 yr old spoiled kid, the world is his, in his head..

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Originally Posted by LIP

If people are THAT horrible and insultive, i dont think words work. You need to SHOW him how you feel.

Im not saying violence is right, and tbh i hate fighting, but some people cant be talked to. People like him will answer the questions with more childish crap that no one wants to hear.

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Once you stoop to violence you, in essence, say that you lack the intelligence or the skill set to handle the situation. Its like when parents beat their kids. Its saying that they don't have the skills to handle a 5 yr old. And then what happens when the 5 yr old becomes an adult? He/she reaches for the very same tools that they learned as a 5 yr old, which is more violence.

My guess is that our thread-starter was raised in a tolerant home and has handled this situation with tolerance. But sometimes tolerance is interpreted as 'approval' and that should not be the case here.

I was a pub bouncer and seldom had to use violence to control the situation.
I easily could have but why should I put myself in harm's way?

Am I wrong here?

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Originally Posted by hewhispers

Once you stoop to violence you, in essence, say that you lack the intelligence or the skill set to handle the situation. Its like when parents beat their kids. Its saying that they don't have the skills to handle a 5 yr old. And then what happens when the 5 yr old becomes an adult? He/she reaches for the very same tools that they learned as a 5 yr old, which is more violence.

My guess is that our thread-starter was raised in a tolerant home and has handled this situation with tolerance. But sometimes tolerance is interpreted as 'approval' and that should not be the case here.

I was a pub bouncer and seldom had to use violence to control the situation.
I easily could have but why should I put myself in harm's way?

Am I wrong here?

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When someone insults me, i'll shout at them, and threaten them. I wont hit them unless they try to hit me.

If someone annoys me same thing goes.

As soon as someone insults my family, i'll fight them untill they're not moving.

When someone says something that bad about someones family words wont work.

If you tell them to stop, they'll carry on. If you hit them so hard they cant move, they'll never even think of doing it again.

Family loyalties mean everything, and when someone does something that insulting they deserve to be lamped.

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Originally Posted by LIP

When someone insults me, i'll shout at them, and threaten them. I wont hit them unless they try to hit me.

If someone annoys me same thing goes.

As soon as someone insults my family, i'll fight them untill they're not moving.

When someone says something that bad about someones family words wont work.

If you tell them to stop, they'll carry on. If you hit them so hard they cant move, they'll never even think of doing it again.

Family loyalties mean everything, and when someone does something that insulting they deserve to be lamped.

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You resort to violence when you could simply walk away?
What does that say about the type of person you are and how you choose to handle difficult situations? And what if you were with your child? Is that the lesson you want to teach them, is that you resolve problems with your fists?

I know a black belt that was being hassled by a homeless man.
Certainly the blackblet could have kicked his ass, but he chose to walk way.
I couldn't believe it and I asked him "why?"
His reply was the he could have used violence but was it worth risking the the small chance of getting cut or stabbed by this homeless guy?
In the end he was right.

You never know what you have when you get in with it with another man.
If someone picked a fight with me and cornered me....and I thought my life was in danger....they would get a plastic shank in the throat. Thats violence that I never want to get to.

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Originally Posted by hewhispers

You resort to violence when you could simply walk away?
What does that say about the type of person you are and how you choose to handle difficult situations? And what if you were with your child? Is that the lesson you want to teach them, is that you resolve problems with your fists?

I know a black belt that was being hassled by a homeless man.
Certainly the blackblet could have kicked his ass, but he chose to walk way.
I couldn't believe it and I asked him "why?"
His reply was the he could have used violence but was it worth risking the the small chance of getting cut or stabbed by this homeless guy?
In the end he was right.

You never know what you have when you get in with it with another man.
If someone picked a fight with me and cornered me....and I thought my life was in danger....they would get a plastic shank in the throat. Thats violence that I never want to get to.

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Walking away is saying its ok to say those kind of things. Things like that are not ok, and people who say them need to be taught a lesson in life. Simple as that. Im not a violent person, i dont like fighting, but if anything is said about my family they've got a fight weather they like it or not. Family loyalty.

Yeah, by reading this story, he doesn't sound like too friendy of a guy. I would have stopped talking to him right after the first smart ass comment. I just ignore people like that and usually kick them out of my circle until they learn to talk to me like a normal human being. If it's my weed, and they direspect me, they can go find someone else to smoke them up with.

As for "making me" go outside in the cold, there are 2 words for that, fuck and you. :) How can someone make you go outside? I would have told him to pipe down and relax.

Anyways, he sounds like a total buzzkill. I would have ignored him completly. :thumbsup:

The guy seems like a complete utter ass hole.. You should have DDT'd him through a table, then told him to STFU & not to smoke your weed.. Then before you leave give him a leg drop... That would teach him about dissin your weed and been disrespectful..(sp)

Definitely not a good situation. He definitely sounds like a jerk. I have to agree with most of what ~hewhispers~ said. Although he sounds like a real jerk, that doesn't mean that you necessarily have to resort to violence.

There are many things you could have said to diffuse that situation from the beginning, or at least evaluate the severity of his "assholeness" by making a countering comment.

Most people will realize they are in the wrong if you call them out and stand your ground, and then you will earn more respect from others. Then if he continues to be a prick, I like the phrase "There's the door, bro. Use it."

That should have calmed him down to a tolerable level...or rid you of his presence. The friend whose house you were in also should have made a stand. I sure as hell wouldn't have gone outside to smoke just for this joker...hell no.

LIP, I wonder sometimes about you, man. I've kept my mouth shut about some of the sh*t you say, but, come on. You go around acting all high and mighty, like you were a MOD or something, and telling newbies to 'just leave' when they act up...then you go and openly condone that kind of violence, while at the same time saying you don't like violence. Sounds a little hypocritical to me, man.

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Originally Posted by LIP

Your in America right?

Get yourself a cheap gun [one that will kill]

Then if that cunt comes near you again or says anything pull that fucking slide back and stick it under his chin. Just hold him there untill he cries. Then as he runs, shoot the floor near his feet.

He'll never be a prick to anyone you know again.

If i was you as soon as he'd said the shit about your sister i would have varnished the floor with his brains.

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It sure looks to me that you do like violence...and are surely recommending it here. I'm not trying to flame or anything, it just seems that ~hewhispers~ had it right when he said

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Originally Posted by hewhispers

Once you stoop to violence you, in essence, say that you lack the intelligence or the skill set to handle the situation.

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You can't just go around beating the sh*t out of people just because they are stupid and rude. Well, you can, then you can mail us posts from prison.


That's all I have to say for now.


The Fog :rastasmoke:

sometimes, it is right to hurt someone.
i believe that this is on of those ituations, violence doesnt solve everything but this guy sounds like he needed a good ass kicking... he might have never had one because people just walk away and ignore him.