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dude you got so much experience out of all this, grown up, had a long term stable relationship, motivation through TOUGH classes, YOU ARE LEARNING AND GROWING BY THE SECOND. u haven't failed, she isn't the worst person ever, you just can't live with her... too bad you had to find out now... i had an older man tell me once never to get married till you have been with the person closely for 5 years, because there is little left to hide about themself... it's very true...
If this all goes the way it feels like its going, then I'm going to have to remember that 5 year thing.Quote:
Originally Posted by HighTillIDie
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Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
Bull... You have learned alot you had some good times. Now you know what to look for next time. Only if you come out of this and don't learn any thing, then you have wasted your time.
I've definitely learned a lot. I wish I could go back and just do it all over again differently, but I cant. If it ends, it ends. She packed up all of her things, so I'm left in my own place.... at least I hear that's good if we do get a divorce. Usually being the one that leaves is not good for you in the case of a divorce, apparently. She's on the lease though for the rental property. Mistake by me, I guess. We also split a bank account.. not like I have anything for her to take that she hasnt taken already.Quote:
Originally Posted by igot4cheep
yea, while you do need to remember that, you need to not think about long term blah blah blah
you serious mother fucker.
You are doing everything right, anyone that tells you otherwise or judges you... would also judge you for smoking weed... and we both know that neither of these things are how society views them, FUCK EM... i am gonna roll up a fatty at your delima, dr kid. I would hate to be in your position and not have all the experience with women i have... i can't imagine what you are going through... just don't listen to your heart, BAD IDEA... i am guessing listening to your heart is what made this a 3 year relationship not a 2 1/2
YOU HEAR ME?
Your guesses would be right. Dude... I hate this. She was so perfect when I met her, lol. I guess things really change, huh. Well.. On a more practical note, what the hell do I do? Do I go see a lawyer? Do I tell her not to come back? I'm kind of new to all of this BS.Quote:
Originally Posted by HighTillIDie
Quote:
Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
Dude move and change you number. Get you a GOOD lawyer. In the mean time gatther up all of here stuff and put in a box and sell it on Ebay.
YOU AUTOMATICALLY SEE A LAWYER, i don't care if you aren't even sure
ONLY talk to her when you are sure... don't jerk her around, be clear, civil, and communative... your relationship isn't over, just changing
And no moron, things didn't change, she just let her guard down, and you got to see the real her... we all act different in the beginning... not me, but tards do, lol... that's a classic rule of the game
lol i am just being harsh on you cuz you need it, but you have to communicate as best as you can with her, no reason to hurt her more than need be... she is a lazy bitch, but she doesn't know that, so she won't believe it, and it will be painful to hear.
Lol dude. I barely have enough money to pay the rent. I'd have more were it not for her insisting she take a single summer class that costed 500 dollars. I can't move though, locked into my contract with the land lord. I might be able to get a lawyer for cheap though, being that my case really isnt all that complicated. We don't have verymany assets.Quote:
Originally Posted by igot4cheep
I understand being harsh, dont worry about it. I am not going to hurt her any more than need be, you're right. I'd like to make it as easy for her as possible. She needs some help, and I can't handle her. She's going to quickly learn that her mom can't take care of her anymore, as she's too old for that now, and she's going to have to depend on herself and herself alone. Thats going to be tough for her. She's going to realize she made a mistake, because dude, she's never gonna find another guy like me. I've given her so much respect its not even funny.Quote:
Originally Posted by HighTillIDie
lol, no, she is a lazy bitch not a cheating psycho whore...Quote:
Originally Posted by igot4cheep
keep your number, so your friends can call you
let her have her stuff... she is thinking like him man, OH NO, I"M A FAILURE, she will be hurting and full of mixed emotions... she will try SUPER HARD to manipulate him again, or SUPER HARD to hate on him... he needs to do the kill em with kindness thing as long as he can. it's the safest/healthiest option
btw since your young you may have alot of options as far as legally, depending on your area...
they will guide you through the rest of the process, like how to talk to her, when, about what... maybe you can get her to no contest with you, ect ect
lol that's your mistake, you gave her no reason to respect you... women are funny creatures man...Quote:
Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
NICE GUYS FINISH LAST...
OH, and you can't spend your time worrying about her... she is an adult, and stepped into an adult world when that ring went on... SHE IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY
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Originally Posted by HighTillIDie
PERACH...!!! He is telling you the truth. She dose not even think that is someitng wrong with her at all.
hmm...
You know, she left the ring with me. She threw it at me.
That's a 1000 dollar ring I bought for her.
Hmm...
She really doesn't dude. She thinks that she has NOTHING to do with any of this. She thinks its all the cats fault, and reasons her not helping, because I dont want to get rid of the cats. It's not their fucking fault that she doesn't clean their litter box and its overflowing with shit. And then she blames them when they finally get tired of using it. Well, its not their fault that the dishes are growing fucking mold.Quote:
Originally Posted by igot4cheep
I got pictures too, man, pictures of me cleaning EVERYTHING and her not helping at all. Pictures of some of the bruises she's put on me just for arguing with her. She's really got nothing on me, man. I really feel like I'm thinking very clearly right now.
lol yea, she is working a bluff buddyQuote:
Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
she got freaked out when you grew a spine so she got desperate
(i mean she could be serious, but women FUNCTION ON EMOTION, and crave drama, because it is emotional fuel)
think man, when shit is final you have a tuition reimbursement in gold and diamond
WOMEN, KNOW I LOVE YOU ALL, i just know alot about the game
Quote:
Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
Wow... She is lazy and stupid.
You know what. Fuck it.Quote:
Originally Posted by HighTillIDie
I just "lost" the ring.
I might "find" it again in a few months when I need the money for textbooks.
well you need a police report to really make things work in court for you... but stillQuote:
Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
BTW she is young man, don't expect much from her in court, unless her parents have money and hate you
only cougars fuck your asshole in court
Her parent (her dad died when we were together) is poor, and loves me.Quote:
Originally Posted by HighTillIDie
i'm tired of double, tripple posting... if you want go to chat
I'll still post here, but sure, I'll chill in chat too.
im 21 and have been living with my girl for 2 years now and on my own since i was 16 i have had some real low points in my life i've lived in my car for mounths and have been couch surfing at all my buddys places. thing where tite for a while and still are i guess but my girl has always had a posative attatude and brings me up when i am down, she cooks cleans and and rolls me joints and i have my own jobs like garbage, takin care of the dog (dutchie) and carrying heavy things lol. so i guess what im sayin is if shes not what u want in a girl leave her cuz theres alot of girl out there who would love to be with a doctor. and are tidy
oh ya with out my girl i would'nt be the man i am now.
See you need girl like his, maby she has a sister?Quote:
Originally Posted by wont say
it is definately time for some changes or for you to move on.... i'm not very big on splitting up becuaes the people aren't getting along, but this is just fucking ridiculous
Slipknot, I'm just like you. I hate it when people brake up over petty disagreements, but this is bordering on insanity for me.
Man. I wish. I just wish that she could be that woman. I can't see why she cant.Quote:
Originally Posted by igot4cheep
well ifyou don't want to leave her, and you do love her and want her to change, you could always cut her off of everything, MAKE her do shit for herself... alot harder then it sounds but it is possible...
The bitch just took half of my money out of the bank account. She hasn't worked a single minute for the last year and a half! WTF!
Pending this next phone call, its about to be over between us. I was hoping that things would change, but she had to go and do something completely brash like this. I can't even fucking pay rent now.
A Girls voice here.:hippy:That really sucks I can understand somwhat how you feel. I am 20 years old I live with my 24 year old wounderful boyfriend I hope to marry one day. I have depression like your wife, depression is terrible. I've been working on what her habit is to. I am lazy and i procrastinate, I don't have a job wish I had one but want to get my high school diploma first. I am going to get better and treat my boyfriend better. But your wife does need help, try talking to her mother so she can slap some sence into her. My mom is always telling me to do better. Depression takes alot out of a girl cause we have so many emotions going on. Be patient with her always, walk away from lots of arguments when they are going no where. And yea I agree probaly the best thing for you to do is cut her off. She needs to learn life is about working to keep yourself living not being lazy.
that sucks dude, cuz she's your wife and there ain't really shit you can do about it.... since yal got married, reguardless of how much she has or hasn't put in, she owns half your shit now.Quote:
Originally Posted by drivebyphilosopher
dude i feel for you, i got married at 18, and we had our rocky moments of course, but we're making it now... but getting married so young is a bad idea, reguardless of how much you love that person.
you still got something on your side....
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Originally Posted by Louis C.K.
Thanks. I value what you had to say there. I like hearing from a different perspective. I hope that she gets better one day, but I cannot forgive some of the things she's done to me. I am sorry for calling her a bitch, by the way, I don't like to degrade any woman in that sort of way, and I know the term is offensive to all women. I just feel so stabbed in the back. Its like she did it on purpose, treated me this way just to get money from me in the future, and now that I finally showed a little spine and told her to help, she just up and left, and took what she could.Quote:
Originally Posted by snicklefritz1825
That is a bitchy thing to do. Yea alot of girls don't like it but hey we can be bitches like you can be asses.:D If you decide not to leave her cut her off still sounds like a good idea to me. Depends on how she truly feels about you.
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Originally Posted by slipknotpsycho
Yeah. I know man. I know that she is my wife and is entitled to half. So be it, she can have it. If that is what she values over our relationship, then I no longer feel bad about us splitting up.
You said she is young, and if you guys got together in school, she probably hasn't had the time or experience to realize what really goes into making a relationship work.
I'm not working right now, so I take care of the housework, errands, bills...etc. But when I start working, we'll split the chores 50/50. Cleaning and cooking is not just a womans job...I hate it when guys say that. But because I have more free time, and my husband is exhausted by the time he gets home from work, I take care of it. Gve and take kind of thing;)
You can't make someone grow up, but if you love her, try to work it out. Maybe you guys could get some counseling? There is always a way. If you don't think you can continue the relationship and be happy and satisfied, then move on. Best of luck to you.
I'd love to split the work 50/50 even though she DOESNT have a job. But 95/5% just isn't cutting it when all she does is stay at home all day and doesnt bother supporting the family.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bluntmasterbabe
I just got done smoking 1 bong bowl of midgrade. I am very high right now and I am about to go walk down the street to Dbo's Hot wings.:D:stoned:
Oops I'm so high I posted on the wrong thread.:eek:
I skimmed through and read a good portion of the posts.. theres alot of them for one day!!
My friend.. it seems that you have come to terms with her immaturity and the fact that she will most likely not change any time soon. I would chalk it up as a loss and learn from your mistakes. Be much more reserved in future romantic endeavors in order to prevent falling too hard for somebody before you really know them. I have made that mistake a couple times and it always ends in disaster.
It would not be a bad idea to wait until you are done with school to get into another relationship.. clear your head a little.
You are very clearly a smart and responsible dude. Dont allow yourself to get sucked into young, petty, immature bullshit like this.
Depression is an excuse to be obsessed with yourself. I was depressed for quite some time, suicidal, bi-polar, all that shit. They had me on 3,000 mg of Depakote a day for it because my levels were so fucked up, I was poppin two of the pink 500mg horse pills three times a day. And one day I just stopped taking that shit, I didnt want to rely on medication anymore, that was just another crutch. Fuck all that shit.. depression is: magnifying your problems in your head so that they appear monumentally impossible to get over, then feeling sorry for yourself for what you have to go through. When I realized all that I became very embarrassed and got over all that dumb shit within like a day lmao. This is YEARS of depression, too, not just a 2 month stint lol.
I guess the point is, make sure when you start getting interested in another woman she isnt selfish and self-centered. Make sure she is mature and has her head on straight.
So she just called me. She still was not ready to apologise. She said she just needed the money, and that's how it is. I have no way of getting back from her, buy whatever. I asked her if I needed to get a lawyer, and she said "Do whatever you want." I asked her if she got a lawyer and she said no. I think she called me to get an appology from me! I called her a failure in yesterday's arguement, said that she wouldn't amount to anything if she keeps being so responsible. She said that was over the line and over the top, and a stupid reaction to her telling me to "shut up" I told her to pay the cable bill. I didn't think it was over the top, because told her that the reaction was not to her saying shut up, but to the whole situation in general and how much she doesn't help me.
She then brought up something I said a LOOONG time ago, about how "She doesn't need to help out physically, but just give emotional support" and I flat out told her that emotionally, she's done nothing but bring me down with her suicide threats and laziness. She hung up after that.