My sister keeps telling me to see a councilor...

Your sister's onto something. You've resisted the same recommendation from me, my husband, and from others here.

Going to a counselor doesn't mean you have to stay in treatment forever. But a good one can make a world of difference. It's understandable with all your anxieties and social unease you'd be wary of taking that step. But if you can find one who is kind and perceptive and stick with him/her past the initial flight response when you start getting down to the brass tacks of what's up with you (you'll want to terminate treatment and run for the hills when that happens, knowing you), you will benefit immensely. So will the people who care about you.

THCBongman's right. There are a lot of folks who care about you and are your friends. Right here. Me included. I've sought treatment for anxiety, PTSD and depression myself. It takes a heck of a lot more courage to work on yourself than to keep living as an emotional invalid. You have that courage. I know you do. I've seen you display it here in numerous ways.

I have a good friend who takes Zoloft because he has OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and he said that the Zoloft really relaxes him.
I know this is a little off topic, but the other day he took a little more than what he was supposed to take and he was fucked up for half of the day. I thought he was high (he doesnt smoke weed). I was going to be like YES!!

Anways when you go to a therapist, (my friend goes to one) ask them if Zoloft would help you. Hope that you can get everything worked out and keep a smile on your face man!

Heh, I didn't even realize that many people here liked me. But damn, thankyou all so much! it's good to not feel like a social outcast everywhere.


Anywhoo, the last 3 or 4 days I've been adamentaly forcing myself to meditate, for periods longer than is comfortable, in an effort to force myself to examine the corners of my mind that I didnt' want to, and maybe more importantly to break out of a very bad perception I was trapped in. I gotta say my mind's been a whole lot healthier these last few days, actually at peace.

Now I'll admit I was thinking that since I'm stable, I won't even consider the therapy unless I start to relapse emotionally. But after reading your posts I realized that being in a healthy state of mind is probably the only time I will take the initiative to do it, so I will.

In fact I was talking to a doctor today (I rarely get to see this guy, but he's fantastic) and he told me about the greatest place I had no idea existed! It's a pain-management center that has physiotherapists, pain-specialist doctors, excercise rooms, meditation, yoga, I think tai-chi, and psychologists for talk therapy. It's exactly what I wanted, a facility that hits you with every approach.
Of course it's expensive as hell, and apparently it's mostly used by national sports teams and people that are very wealthy... BUT, if my college insurance covers this (which it probably should) my parents said they're willing to pay for the rest.

Plus the doctor gave me a referral to this one guy in town that's a physiatrist who apparently specializes in chronic pain management and uses some unique, alternative approaches (I don't know what yet). But it's a long waiting list, I'm probably look at a year and a half or so.

Anywhoo, one heck of a productive day and it's SO refreshing to find a really good doctor that actively looks for solutions, not just more painkillers. I mean to disrespect to doctors in general, but of the 12 or so doctors I've tried I've only found 2 guys that actively try to fix the problem. lol, I found them both by coincidence but it turns out they're good friends, and big fans of House, my favorite television show:thumbsup:

Oh, and one more thing! I feel like a big weight is off my shoulders since I'm getting out of business and now found a diploma program that focuses entirely on writing, anthropology, and sociology; 3 things I love and am good at!
Still some big issues to take care of in life, but I'm tackling them one at a time.

Again, thankyou all so much! I shall endeavor to be possitive and productive for myself and for those I know, including and especially you all here.

'night everybody:jointsmile:

Awww you made me all sniffly. I'm such a girl. Good luck to you!:thumbsup:

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Originally Posted by weedmant

Anways when you go to a therapist, (my friend goes to one) ask them if Zoloft would help you. Hope that you can get everything worked out and keep a smile on your face man!

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Since when do we (the patient) ask/tell our doctors what meds we want (thats what our dealers are for) our DOCTORS are supposed to tell US what meds we might need....you tell your doc what you want and he/she gives it, does that not make them a dealer??






Gandalf_The_Grey,

you mentioned "pain-managment" i am assuming physical pain...this i can relate to since a broken back left me a paraplegic
with horrible life long pain...(short version) i started with low level pain meds but now i use Fentanyl patches...my point being you MUST i repeat you MUST get that pain under control before all other problems or you will get nowhere..well you'll get right back where you are or maybe even deeper than you are now....
if you can't use anything i said i hope you find what you are looking for man....

I. grower

^you make Mrs. head hurt.

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Originally Posted by weedmant

I have a good friend who takes Zoloft because he has OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and he said that the Zoloft really relaxes him.

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The OP did not complain of OCD-like symptoms.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by weedmant

I know this is a little off topic, but the other day he took a little more than what he was supposed to take and he was fucked up for half of the day. I thought he was high (he doesnt smoke weed). I was going to be like YES!!

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You should know our policy on discussion of perscription med abuse. If not, I will be happy to re-set your rules acceptance status and sned you the link.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by weedmant

Anways when you go to a therapist, (my friend goes to one) ask them if Zoloft would help you.

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That's not how it works. You go to a therapist. He talks to you for a couple sessions, gets a feel for your troubles. He thinks about whether you need medication at all. IF he decides you do, he'll talk to you about it, and suggest a med that suits the symptoms that present.

Zoloft is a PRIMITIVE ssri. I was put on it by my PCP, a NP, not by a shrink, who mistook my symptoms for PMS... what a crock of SHIT. I've got severe anxiety. The Zoloft made it FAR worse. Like, panic attack worse. I went off it after getting arrested for assault.

It's irresponsible to suggest specific psych meds to someone when you know NOTHING about them, their application, or their side effects.

Most people are looking for connections in life, and that seems to be the main case with 1people who are troubled by anti-social tendencies within themselves.

We're all connected through similarities. The majority of the population has something wrong with them. I grew up in a family that has experienced all types of abuse:
drugs,
physical abuse,
mental abuse,
death,
divorce,
seperation....

And yet, I stand here, a young adult on his was to success. I experienced what a lot of people experience, and yet I end up like this? For a while I was angry with the fact that I could end up so... normal, above average if you will, and I had all this shit happen in my life. I say all this for rhetoric, I want you to see that there's a way to be stable after a life of instability.

You say you can barely explain the problem but yet you describe it fairly well, and this is what i've summed up from everything:

1. You're not entirely sure of what you want to do in life, but you think you have an idea, and the idea you first had isn't working out. So, you're trying something else but now you've got to deal with the problem of not wanting what you got yourself into originally.
2. You're upset over the fact that you can't make yourself do something when you obviously have the ability to do it, but you don't want to do it because you're sick of always doing things that are making you stressed out. And all this stress is making you emotional, but you don't understand your emotions because you are instable from stress. You say these worries go through your head 24/7, and that is probably your main issue. You don't know how to NOT worry, but it's ok, because humans often get lost in paradoxical thought processes. Infinity is a thing humans can't comprehend, and when we do something infinite or think something infinite, things become chaotic.
3. Fight or flight, this is a common term for panic attacks. It's where one must make a decision in a situation where they are in a panicked state. They don't understand how to deal with a situation so they try to escape or flee from the problem. And you are doing simply that. You say it's to take a break from reality, but what I believe to have learned is that reality is what you make of it. Have you ever tried to "step back" from yourself, and examined whatever it is that you're worrying about? When I feel that i'm getting to worked up and worried, I make myself stop, and step back from reality(if you will), and think about everything that's going on. I think about why i'm worrying, why does it all matter, why do I care, and why am I over analyzing things? In your situation, you say you're fearful of opening up to someone because you have no idea what to expect. Have you ever considered that you're not the only one who's felt whatever you are feeling, and you're not the only one who is having these problems? People aren't as critical as you think. I think you have it too embedded in your mind that something is wrong with you, when nothing is wrong at all.
4. You're afraid of being alone. Well, there's a lot of things, a lot of people, that are all alone. You just need to cope with the fact that there are times in your life you're going to be "alone", but do not worry, you have yourself! You must learn to love yourself, however stupid you think that sounds. You have to learn to tolerate yourself and accept yourself before you can even handle others. Now, why are you afraid of being alone? I would assume it's because you want the affection of another person. You want the emotion that comes from all the relationships in life. You're just going to have to make the effort of making the relationships.

And you should be asking yourself,
"what can I do to help myself?"
because how can someone else help you if you can't even help yourself?

I'm sorry Stinky. I should have done more reading first! I won't make this mistake again.