Well, She Left Me...

[Gothen]

So, I guess this is another vent thread. Sorry I'm wasting up space, but I need to get it out and its 2:30 am and I'm all alone and I really can't handle it. Been with this girl for 9 months now and last night we get into an argument and I say some things that I don't mean because she was going out with her friends on the anniversary of my uncle's suicide. I told her it'd mean a lot to me if she stayed home, but she left anyway, so I yelled at her and said that I hated her and it pissed me off so fucking much she was leaving me on this night.

So, anyway, she calls me today and we talk for...god...hours..5, nearly six and it turns out last night she meant this guy and today she just broke up with me and said that it's just too stressful on her. How...how its so hard because her parents don't approve of her being with me and do everything in the world to stop her so when we go out they always make her get home by like...9 and on weekdays we'll be lucky if we get till 10:30. She can't even come see me unless her narc cousin comes with her, so she said she couldn't do it. She says she still is so much in love with me, that she always will be that I'll always be with her but that we just need time because its so hard right now. I gave everything to this girl. It'd been so long since I'd opened up to anyone and she broke my heart again. I know it was only 9 months, but I literally spent some of the best nights in my life.

I know there are other girls out there, but it's just so hard for me to accept she's not mine anymore. She said she still wants to be close friends, but I don't know...it's so hard for me to have to stay with her and be there for her, but not to be with her. I was crying for about 2 or 3 hours, I guess because I really didn't need this on top of getting kicked out by my mom, and coming to the realization that I won't be able to go to college for a while because I'll have to work my ass off just to make it in some shitty one bedroom apartment. Man, she picked a classic time to lay this on me.

Last time I got hurt, I said I'd never do it again, that I'd never put myself through it. But, I slowly found myself falling for this girl. Not some superficial love, but something that I thought was concrete and true. Something that was going to last. But, I guess I'm just naive, right? ::breathes deep::

Love is more destructive than any other thing I know. More wars have been waged and lives lost in the name of "love" or the jealousy sometimes felt from unfaithful partners than any other thing, except for maybe God.

Time to pick yourself up, Malik. Time to fill in the gaps and move on. Your heart's only an organ. Your soul is without bounds.

:(

[Reefer Rogue]

I'm sorry to hear that man. Try to stay strong.

[minnesota man]

Yeah. Try to start drinking more or just stop thinking about it. I pined after a lost girl for over a year. What a waste of time. You're life and reality begins in your mind so rearrange it the way you want it to be. Really.

[FindingTim]

Coming from someone who has experienced heartbreak in a similar fashion (10 months instead of 9), I know how devestating it can be. The bottom line is that there isn't a magic potion that can instantly make you feel better (wrong web site to say that) and the only cure is time.

The best thing you can do if you feel that any chance with this girl is lost is to spend quality time with your good friends (if they are really good friends they will find ways to make you feel better).

Another effective way to reduce the time it takes to get over a person is to delete any phone numbers, email addresses, or anything that connects you to them. Yes, that means no looking at her myspace pictures at 4 in the morning because you are too depressed to sleep.

Anyways, I may sound like a jerk but the truth is that there isn't a whole lot to do. Just remember that in almost every relationship each person feels that they have truly found someone special, and a little while after the breakup they almost always realize that they were not meant to be together anyways.

Good luck, and sorry if I made things worse. I was initially trying to help.

One more thing: Make a list of all the things in life that you are grateful for and it may potentially help you realize that you are lucky just to be here.

[exoticnoise]

yeah man, very sorry to hear that. just spend alot of time with your friends, go out right away and start meeting chicks, smoke some herb so it will be alil more fun. and i have had many relationships that a girl has brokein up with me and a few days later call me back and say they were wrong and the found out they made a mistake and they really know they love you. and another thing, i might have some stuff that will help you through some tougher times, so if you think you need it, email me at deadman_mod@yahoo. com or aim jami7713 i know how hard it is when you lose someone so close to you. just trying to help, so get in touch man, and just remember, have fun and you'll be good.

[Mr. TBAGU 420]

Yeah dude, breakups are always tough. When i dated this one girl for around the same time you dated that one chick, when we broke up, it sucked. I really felt depressed and just felt like my life was crumbling down. I had friends to support me through it though, and a family that helped with it. Smoking herb helps the pain and it makes your life a lot less hectic. In the end though, you will see that it was meant to be the way it is now. I realized that after me and my girl friend broke up. You may not agree with me, but i'm sure it will end up that way. Also, don't get down and not try to hook up with any girls for a long time. The way to heal yourself is the way of getting back in the game. Go out with friends, meet some girls, have a good time. There are so many girls (fish) in the sea that you will find that special someone someday. Believe me, it takes time, but when you do, it is all worth it in the end. Hope everything starts lookin up for you man.

[yabatab]

Women are pure evil in that sense, if they dump you
you sit there thinking about all the shit you could have
done different to make her stay when it actually wasn't
meant to be any ways. Just think of it like this if she went
out and found someone else that fast she never really loved
you to begin with. Move on and put her behind you, pondering
on this is only a waste of time.

[minnesota man]

Yeah, plus just be thankful you don't have that disease like the guy in yabatab's avatar. That would really suck. I mean try getting a date lookin like that.

[OtterPop]

yo tiebreaker

[chisme]

Yeah. Try to start drinking more or just stop thinking about it. I pined after a lost girl for over a year. What a waste of time. You're life and reality begins in your mind so rearrange it the way you want it to be. Really.


i wouldnt really say the drink bit was good advice there bro.....but the hearts there.

[minnesota man]

You're prolly right Chisme, but that's what I did and it worked. It makes you forget about the girl troubl;e but then you got to deal with the alcoholism.


Yeah let's go Otter. What room? Squirrel Square is nice and empty. I'll bring Miss World too.

I'm gonna pee and have a ciggy 1st. Invite me.

[Peach.Optimo.Bluntz]

I dont think u should drink more, i think u should just smoke more if not, stay sober. Plenty of fish in the sea my friend. Cheer up.

[yabatab]

Yeah, plus just be thankful you don't have that disease like the guy in yabatab's avatar. That would really suck. I mean try getting a date lookin like that.

Yeah things could always be worse.....LOL

Just think of that poor bastard trying to pick
up a girl at a bar, i bet he couldn't even get a
fat chick.

[3rdEyeVision]

just look forward to the next girl you meet, theres gotta be plenty of girls more attractive than your ex-girlfreind was...go hit on em and I bet you'll get lucky ;)

[locomark]

Well,

I say look for a cool roommate situation to cut your housing cost. Have you tired a job in the security field? Yes, you would have to give up weed for a month or so to pass the drug test but it is a perfect job to study on the job with and you have flexable hours. As far as school is concern maybe you should look into community college. Cheaper books, cheaper tuition no dorm cost then you transfer after two years to the local university to recieve your degree.

Plus some of those college girls give the best head. But what do I know?

Loco

[mojoke]

Just think of that poor bastard trying to pick
up a girl at a bar, i bet he couldn't even get a
fat chick.

mm...i dunno...i've seen some drunk fat chicks who would fuck my dog if i wasn't up for it.

[m.g.]

if you want any chance at all of getting her back you'll need to give her space. that means don't call her or have any contact with her...let her do that. you'll do a lot better by acting like, 'oh well...' than if you forced yourself into her life right now. there's still a chance but you need to be cool, calm and collected (yes, an old phrase but a truthful one).

take back the power she has taken from you...be strong and make yourself available to other ladies!

[Gothen]

Thanks for all the replies, guys! This is really going to help me at night when I'm all alone now when I would usually be with her. It just sucks so bad.
I was really blindsided because I thought things were fine. Guess I just didn't pay attention. I'm trying so hard to stay positive and keep busy. Like Mike Shinoda said, "And I'm doing anything to keep the thought of you from my mind, I'm doing fine. And I'm planning to keep it that way, you can call me when you find that you have something to say."

I just woke up, thought I was fine, but I still fin dmyself about to cry at the thought of her. She was literally my world, and now its like I'm just lost drifting in space all alone. Thousands of beautiful things to be seen and wondered about, but when you're all alone...what really is the point of such beautiful things? You guys will be my strength for me, for the next couple weeks.

My friends never approved of the relationship, and my friend's idea of making it better was to smoke a bowl and listen to some Ozzy. Which we did, which made me cry. Which made him leave, which made me cry harder, I guess. So, I need you guys.

She wants to stay really good friends. Its like every girl that breaks up with me wants to stay really good friends with me. They become attached to me just because of the way I put things, my view on life. They say I'm always really fun to be around and really funny and all that, but obviously not enough to keep you mine. Just enough to keep you a friend. I don't know if I can do that, I don't know if, right now, I can handle having to listen to that little fuck that she now "has feelings for" from ONE NIGHT!

Thanks for all the replies, guys! Right now I feel like I've given everything I had to Amber, the girl, and I feel I don't have anything left to give to someone else. Maybe that means it was a good love? I don't know...god, I already miss her so much.

[Gothen]

Sorry for the double posting, I just wanted to say that th eone thing I don't understand is how someone can throw 9 months out the window in just one night. Any girls out there understand!?

[Skink]

We men get hit the hardest for some reason... You will find in time it was for the best,cause if she loved you,she would not pull shit like this... This is usaully part one in the control game and she played the card at the time most woman do,when they know yur hooked,and she knows...

[daima]

So, I guess this is another vent thread. Sorry I'm wasting up space, but I need to get it out and its 2:30 am and I'm all alone and I really can't handle it. Been with this girl for 9 months now and last night we get into an argument and I say some things that I don't mean because she was going out with her friends on the anniversary of my uncle's suicide. I told her it'd mean a lot to me if she stayed home, but she left anyway, so I yelled at her and said that I hated her and it pissed me off so fucking much she was leaving me on this night.

So, anyway, she calls me today and we talk for...god...hours..5, nearly six and it turns out last night she meant this guy and today she just broke up with me and said that it's just too stressful on her. How...how its so hard because her parents don't approve of her being with me and do everything in the world to stop her so when we go out they always make her get home by like...9 and on weekdays we'll be lucky if we get till 10:30. She can't even come see me unless her narc cousin comes with her, so she said she couldn't do it. She says she still is so much in love with me, that she always will be that I'll always be with her but that we just need time because its so hard right now. I gave everything to this girl. It'd been so long since I'd opened up to anyone and she broke my heart again. I know it was only 9 months, but I literally spent some of the best nights in my life.

I know there are other girls out there, but it's just so hard for me to accept she's not mine anymore. She said she still wants to be close friends, but I don't know...it's so hard for me to have to stay with her and be there for her, but not to be with her. I was crying for about 2 or 3 hours, I guess because I really didn't need this on top of getting kicked out by my mom, and coming to the realization that I won't be able to go to college for a while because I'll have to work my ass off just to make it in some shitty one bedroom apartment. Man, she picked a classic time to lay this on me.

Last time I got hurt, I said I'd never do it again, that I'd never put myself through it. But, I slowly found myself falling for this girl. Not some superficial love, but something that I thought was concrete and true. Something that was going to last. But, I guess I'm just naive, right? ::breathes deep::

Love is more destructive than any other thing I know. More wars have been waged and lives lost in the name of "love" or the jealousy sometimes felt from unfaithful partners than any other thing, except for maybe God.

Time to pick yourself up, Malik. Time to fill in the gaps and move on. Your heart's only an organ. Your soul is without bounds.

:(

WELLLLLLLLLLLLL, my ol' gal left me and i' so glad she did
My ol girl left me and i'm glad she took the kid
Now i have less mouths to feed and
more room to sleep in my bed:dance:

dai*ma:stoned:

[NightProwler]

i think you should get some drugs and go off on your own into the deep deep wilderness... it will help you. and you can return if you ever decide to.

[birdgirl73]

Sorry for the double posting, I just wanted to say that th eone thing I don't understand is how someone can throw 9 months out the window in just one night. Any girls out there understand!?
Sorry you're having to go through this right now, Gothen. I can tell you're hurting. Even though it doesn't seem like it right now, things will get better. The fact that you're open to still going out there and making yourself vulnerable is, I think, a very good sign. Means you haven't given up on love. Just give yourself some time to heal.

The question about how she could throw nine months out the window made me think that probably she'd been unhappy about some stuff for a while and just hadn't let onto that fact. Girls don't generally make the decision to break up with someone lightly. So even though she might have hung in there for nine months, I'm betting somewhere two or three months ago, she began having questions about things. Don't feel too troubled by the fact that she said she had feelings for another guy, either. She may or may not have those feelings for him. She also could easily have just pointed to him as another excuse to back up her decision to make the break with you.

Spend a lot of time being good to yourself, relaxing, and spending time with supportive friends. Then get back out there into circulation!

[iwantFUEGO]

yo man.. if she really LOVED you, she would have cared more than to go find out with some punk on your uncles annniversary. This girl claims she cares about you? put her to the test...
Dont call or answer her phone calls for about 4-5 days. If she really does care about you, she'll frak out and i garuntee shell be at your door step. If she doesnt then youll have your proof and more reason to go meet other people and find someone that really will be there for you.
I used to fight with my girlfriend to the point of tears and i remeber that i used to smoke a bowl... and then the arguement (which i was so passionate about) became something i didnt want to do in a matter of 2 min... Smoking really helps.
feel better PEace

[Gothen]

i think you should get some drugs and go off on your own into the deep deep wilderness... it will help you. and you can return if you ever decide to.

I'm gonna do just that. Got me a 20 of some fire, got me some papes and a bowl, and I got my music. I'm gonna sit here and smoke until the cows come home, should they ever decide to.


I got a question for you guys. So....there is this girl I've known and messed around with before, we've known each other for about 2 years now and a couple months after me and Amber got together we both recognized that we had deep feelings for each other. This girl is in LOVE with me, deeply, truly connected to me, she feels. She wants to be with me. Anyway, in August she is turning in a legal adult and she's getting 500 grand from some kind of account her mom left her when she died. She said she "wants to take me away from here." Now, I called her last night and she still wants to be with me, she still feels the same way about me and wants to be with me etc etc. I have feelings for her, obviously, but would it be immoral of me to hang out with this girl and mess around with her and stuff while I still have Amber on my mind? Would that be wrong of me? Or would that just be me trying to get over her?

And smoking has helped a lot. About 12 hours ago I was watching the Dave Chappelle special on Comedy Central and not even he could cheer me up, I was still bawling my lil eyes out but I thought, "F-Fuck this!" through sobs and tears and I packed a bowl and I took two hits. I didn't want to get RIPPED, just enough to make it go away. And, slowly, the tears started receding and I started grinning a bit as Dave Chappelle washed it allllll away.

[Dutch Pimp]

We men get hit the hardest for some reason... You will find in time it was for the best,cause if she loved you,she would not pull shit like this... This is usaully part one in the control game and she played the card at the time most woman do,when they know yur hooked,and she knows...
After my third wife left me (married 8 years)....I had plenty of time and space to learn how to grow weed......On the computer..she left behind. The Lord works in mysterious ways.

[Gothen]

Hey, guys, I feel really bad for bumping this after so long, but I don't know what to do. It's been a month, but I still cry every single night. She already has a new boyfriend, some kid named Thyler.

I don't know what to do anymore. I think maybe I should go to the doctor and try anti-depressants or something, because I don't think I can handle this anymore. It's just been getting worse this past week. I've just been getting so much like how I was before I started smoking weed.

Like, I started cutting myself again. I know how fucking stupid that is, I know how retarded it is and pathetic, but I can't stop. I'll just sit in my room and cry or cut myself. It's fucking sick, and it's fucking morbid but I can't stop. It's like nothing will end this pain anymore but death. I'm not suicidal, I will never kill myself, but I pray so hard that something will kill me. I don't care about anything anymore. I don't see the reason to even get up out of fucking bed any more. I just lay in bed or sit in my chair listening to music with a sheet over my window.

Is it supposed to hurt this long? Should I still cry every night because of her after a month? I need someone to be there for me and with me right now, and I'm very sorry if I bumped this and it pissed you off. I just feel so alone.

[FeastonThisSHITT]

Try taking a trip to Lebanon this weekend coming up. Experience some mortar and plane bombings. Experience some crying mothers grieving for their dead sons and daughters and husbands. Check out the hospitals and smell some burnt flesh of dieing children.

After that fly down to ethiopia and take a tour of the slums. Take in the scenery of thousands upon thousands of starving, thirsty people, dieing of common colds because they can't afford 25 cents for some american cold medicine.

Just think for a moment about the fact that you could give 1 dollar to one of those kids to feed them for the rest of the week, and perhaps keep them alive long enough for them to grow healthy so they can take care of their family.

Talk to some of the 11 year old girls who work 18 hours a day picking bits of plant material off the ground to make strings and ropes to sell so that they can make some money to buy medicine and food for their dieing parents.



Check out some of that shit for real, then come back and read your posts about some bitch leaving you.

[IanCurtisWishlist]

Gothen,

As a person who has been in the very same situation as yourself (I, being in a relationship of 7 months), I can't help but relate to you with empathy and compassion.

Brother i know it hurts and I know it will still hurt for a long time, but we have all been there and we all will be there sooner or later. the best advice i can give you is to play it cool with her, and don't hope for anything. that might sound discouraging, but it will only drive you crazy. show her that you are the strong one. dont obsessively call her, write her email, etc.. that would not help you two in any sense. why? because it isn't properly communicating. Even if you told her how upset you were, explaining to her in precise detail what it is that you are feeling, she still wouldn't understand it. This is because everybody has their own perceptions... you feel me ?

Let me give you some history about myself. I was with this girl for 7 months, and before that, I had considered her one of my best friends. Our relationship started out sweet, and ended bitterly. In short, I caught her fucking some other guy when I went over to surprise her. Guess who got the surprise?

Upon discovering her fucking this disgusting fat guy, she then laughed in my face, called me crazy, and told me to get the fuck away from her forever. She never called me since then, and we haven't even talked that much. She left me, for another guy. Obviously, I could not help but feel betrayed, hurt, and very very suicidal. Then it occured to me, some months later, that this bitch was indeed a waste of time, that her tits were really gross, that she wasn't worth sucking my energy anymore, and that she really wasn't perfect. Did it drive me to the point of mental insanity, knowing that she was laughing with some OTHER guy? Did it drive me mad knowing that some OTHER guy was fucking her, that she might even be ENJOYING fucking this other guy??? Yes! Of course it did. And then I realized, she was just a person.

Believe me brother, I felt the most love and trust for this person , as opposed to any other person. I thought she was my soul mate, and it all crumbled apart. What is my point, other than telling you how shitty my life was? I can honestly say that what won't kill you, <b>WILL</B> make you <b>STRONGER</b>. This is the turning point in your life. One day, you will be happy that you didn't stay with her forever. One day, you will see that your life is all falling into place the way it should be. No matter how much it hurts, you must persevere, and look to yourself to find the inner strength. It can only come from you.

You were a whole person before you ever met her, and , while you might be feeling like a mere shell of a man at this ever-temporary point of time, just know deep down that, after all the long suffering, you will once again rise up and become as solid as a rock. I swear to you.

Maybe the Buddhist point of view can help you out. The Buddhists (rightly) believe that suffering is caused directly from attachment. To free yourself from suffering, one must separate himself from desire and attachment. If you take that advice, and reasonably apply it to your life, it might work for you, as it has worked for me so many times before.

Don't worry man, life will work out. Someday you won't even think about this break-up. Someday you won't even think about posting on cannabis.com, and you won't remember me, and you won't remember your friends from high school, college, your jobs , very well. Just keep that in mind, when life gets you down; it's all temporary. You have the strength within yourself to make the best of it :)

Stay up, we are all human, and we have all felt your situation. Even if you think anyone couldn't possibly understand how you are feeling, trust me; we ain't that different from eachother. we're ALL human, and naturally we react the same to similar situations (in this context, that is).

This is called the grieving process, and it is a very natural response to such situations. Cry all you want, learn to cope with your feelngs. in the end, you will understand yourself better, you will become a better person. your future awaits :)

edit: i used to cut myself ,and did so while with my ex and after the breakup. i don't do that anymore , since i find it pointless, but it's not good. it's very unpleasant to die, accidentally, from bleeding to death.

[Gothen]

Try taking a trip to Lebanon this weekend coming up. Experience some mortar and plane bombings. Experience some crying mothers grieving for their dead sons and daughters and husbands. Check out the hospitals and smell some burnt flesh of dieing children.

After that fly down to ethiopia and take a tour of the slums. Take in the scenery of thousands upon thousands of starving, thirsty people, dieing of common colds because they can't afford 25 cents for some american cold medicine.

Just think for a moment about the fact that you could give 1 dollar to one of those kids to feed them for the rest of the week, and perhaps keep them alive long enough for them to grow healthy so they can take care of their family.

Talk to some of the 11 year old girls who work 18 hours a day picking bits of plant material off the ground to make strings and ropes to sell so that they can make some money to buy medicine and food for their dieing parents.



Check out some of that shit for real, then come back and read your posts about some bitch leaving you.

Ya know, that's real cool. That's really productive. Do you think that changes anything? Do you not think I realize how unimportant, small, and meangingless my life is? So what if what I'm going through isn't "suffering enough" for you or anyone else. No offense, but fuck you man. You had no right to shit on me and try to make me feel like crap because I'm whining about "some bitch leaving me."

[zeebo phillips]

We men get hit the hardest for some reason... You will find in time it was for the best,cause if she loved you,she would not pull shit like this... This is usaully part one in the control game and she played the card at the time most woman do,when they know yur hooked,and she knows...


You're absolutely right. A lot can happen in nine months (I've been in a relationship for the past nine months). I think it takes a lot of nerve to pull something like that.

Maybe she's afraid of being tied down? If she really loves you she'll realize what she did wrong and try to reconcile. Don't forgive her too easily, though.

And self-destructing only makes things worse. My mom is doing it with her break-up and it's just bringing her down and everyone around her further down. People do give a shit, like us on cann.com, so talk to us instead of hurting yourself. It just isn't worth it.

Stay strong, dear, this will all pass sooner or later. :o

[IanCurtisWishlist]

on another note, it's not abnormal to grieve for 30 days, 60 days, 90 days. this is determined by the level of attachment you felt towards this person... i can say from experience, that when my relationship with my ex crumbled, i felt exactly like i did when my grandfather died. EXACTLY the same. thus i can conclude, reasonablly, that when we experience a breakup of such magnitude, we react to it the same way as we do a death of a close friend/relative. does that make sense to you?

as a human you have the right and need to grieve for as long as you want. dont let fucking assholes and their shitty, closed-minded opinions and remarks get you down man. you are who you are, nothing will change that ever. they don't know who you are, they don't know your past.

Remain strong.

[FeastonThisSHITT]

Ya know, that's real cool. That's really productive. Do you think that changes anything? Do you not think I realize how unimportant, small, and meangingless my life is? So what if what I'm going through isn't "suffering enough" for you or anyone else. No offense, but fuck you man. You had no right to shit on me and try to make me feel like crap because I'm whining about "some bitch leaving me."


I posted what I did to give you some perspective.

- I didn't once say you weren't suffering enough for me.
- I didn't say or remotely suggest your life was small or meaningless.
- I had every right to post what I did. I didn't shit on you in any way shape or form.

You simply took my post and attached a bunch of emotional bullshit to it, making me look like I attacked you in some way. The advice I was giving you was not meant to be negative towards you it was real advice.

I was grieving about a bitch that left me a few years back. I was devastated almost to suicide. Then a friend of mine who worked for world vision sat me down and gave me a message very similiar to what I posted to you. I also thought he was trying to make me feel bad. I went to Africa for 3 months and unloaded cargo supplies and helped towns of suffering people. I saw people being shot, burned beaten, starving. I helped the victims.

After the 3 months I came back and forgot the bitches last name who left me.

Do I think that changes anything? Experience something like that and you tell me. Does that change anything? FUCK YES it does. It changes your whole perspective of the problems in your own life. It makes you feel like you can handle this small shit that your brain blows out of proportion.

I am not saying don't grieve, and I am not suggesting you are bad for feeling the way you are. i was offering a real solution. If it is really THAT bad that your whole life is just fucked because of it, you either can greive it out over a lengthly period of time and eventualy just get over it. (who knows how long that could take), or you could do some soul searching and eventualy realise how small this chick is in the grand scheme of your life.

I was just giving you real advice, if you didn't want to take it, ignore me. Fuck me? Fuck you kid. Keep sittin there feeling sorry for yourself and cutting yourself over some bitch.

[FeastonThisSHITT]

What you are doing is looking for people to feel sorry for you, and it only feeds your own suffering. Overgrow your problem or dwell on it and let it consume you. Or just let time pass and become bored with the subject.

[Baz2137]

Ok For 2 1/2 years throughout High School a dated this girl, same thing happened. What you need to learn about women is they want everything. She wants to be close friends with you because you're a big part of her life, but she also wants to be able to go out and have fun and shit. So because she wants everything, she wants to be able to have you, and stay out late and experience probably the night life and she won't be able to do that with you.

Problem is guys only want a few things in life, 1.Food 2.Sex 3.To get their 'high'. You don't need her stressing over her. Stressing for months on end will only be hard on you, make your life easier try going out with your friends, change your routine around. You'll start to realize that you don't need her anymore and she was just a 9 month routine. Sure you'll still have feelings for her and they might come back, but don't stick around waiting, make the best out of any situation.

[Baz2137]

delted

[Thetrippinhippie]

be strong, yes. thats all i can tell you. dont let her get the best of you. prove to that skank that youre better than that whiney bullshit. be strong. i know it sucks..but its either be strong, or waste your life away over some tramp who supposably is 'inlove' with you yet leaves you for some other guy? doesnt sound too convincing to me. seems as if you deserve someone so much better. keep your chin up please

[thcbongman]

Hey, guys, I feel really bad for bumping this after so long, but I don't know what to do. It's been a month, but I still cry every single night. She already has a new boyfriend, some kid named Thyler.

I don't know what to do anymore. I think maybe I should go to the doctor and try anti-depressants or something, because I don't think I can handle this anymore. It's just been getting worse this past week. I've just been getting so much like how I was before I started smoking weed.

Like, I started cutting myself again. I know how fucking stupid that is, I know how retarded it is and pathetic, but I can't stop. I'll just sit in my room and cry or cut myself. It's fucking sick, and it's fucking morbid but I can't stop. It's like nothing will end this pain anymore but death. I'm not suicidal, I will never kill myself, but I pray so hard that something will kill me. I don't care about anything anymore. I don't see the reason to even get up out of fucking bed any more. I just lay in bed or sit in my chair listening to music with a sheet over my window.

Is it supposed to hurt this long? Should I still cry every night because of her after a month? I need someone to be there for me and with me right now, and I'm very sorry if I bumped this and it pissed you off. I just feel so alone.

You are trying to erase what can't be erased.

In one way or another, you are going to have those thoughts, what could've? What should've? It's over man. She doesn't love you. If she did, she would be standing by your side in one way or another. How do you know you truly love her? Is it to feel a feeling of void in your life?

I tend to stay away from relationship and sexual issues because it's such a fragile issue for me. I see from your posts you are a soul tortured, wanting to be free from these agonizing thoughts. I been in your shoes, tantilizing thoughts, dreams and wishes. It fades with time, but how long depends on you.

Don't rely on self-destructive behavior to let your emotions out. Focus on changing yourself for the better. You have this energy from pain within you that is stronger motivation than anything you will embark. Don't let go to waste. Whatever you dislike about yourself, work to change it. Desires to change with such emotional pain can prove to be beneficial. Example, start working out. Find a new hobby. Start a business. You have emptied your pallette. Nothing better than a fresh start.

From your post, I can tell this woman wasn't right for you. I liken her behavior to a monkey. She holds on to one vine, and won't let go until she holds another, in other words, she found greener pastures in her opinion. That's certainly not the type of girl I would want to be going out with. It shows from the insecurities you have about her. I'm not saying this is truly who she is, this is based on your words.

Live your life to the fullest. Don't wallow, because it accomplishes nothing. Be a better man. Don't give her reasons to validate why she broke up with you. Make her regret it, and in time, you can find a woman who appreciates you for who you are. Fuck around. Enjoy the time you have being single, because it isn't as bad as people make out to be.

Find someone who can furfill your life, rather than be your life. Good luck man. What comes with struggles comes with rewards, only if you try :thumbsup:

[Shannon]

i think you should get some drugs and go off on your own into the deep deep wilderness... it will help you. and you can return if you ever decide to.

word

[mowie wowie]

its better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all

so it looks like you're ahead of me bro, you'll find someone new. Someone better.

[Thetrippinhippie]

if all else fails..you could kill her, then kill yourself. you know, so you dont have to live with the 'guilt' or whatever c(; just joshin ya. dont jump my case for a bit o whacked out humor

[nitemarehippiegirl]

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry, girls can be so cruel, well guys too, but in this case...
I have a few guy friends who have been there and it seems like they take it so much harder than girls do. I don't know if that's true just my personal exp. with my friends. I know it's so easy for me and everybody else here, to say just get over it, she's not worth it-- and as true as that is, it's just not that easy.

Also, I would like to point out that drugs are not the answer, it's cool to enjoy yourself, and no doubt we all do or otherwise we wouldn't be here, but don't turn to them to solve your problems! Your problems are just going to be there waiting for you when you 'wake up'

It wasn't meant to be, do what you have to to move on... and Never try the 'friends' thing, it's like putting salt on a wound or whatever.
I'm sorry I don't have any real advise for you, just wanted to send hugs your way...