How do you do it?

[ImStonedNILikeIt]

Okay. Here is my problem. People please respond. I'm really serious about this, It's kind of like..in all seriousness, but really funny.

Okay, How do you all become social?I don't mean social as in going around asking people to smoke one or anything like that. Just friends. I mean..How do you guys go out, make friends, and become what you are today? do you just blurt things out, or are you shy?OR is the computer the only friends you have?

I missed out on a lot of my social life because I hate people so damn much. But then today I realized. Where the hell am I?Here I sit online, with no real life friends, and what real life friends I do have, have their own lifes and don't pay much attention to me anymore.I'm not whinning or bitching, or anything. I'm just wondering. How do you guys do become so socially acceptable, or just talk to people in the real world. I'm really shy, and I'm 22 I'm a single mother, so people kind of look at me like "What the hell is she doing?" I don't know...

Please respond people..I'm serious for once. lol. :D

[ezjim]

getting out of the house for a few hours a day would be a good start..where i live we have a river that runs through town and most stoner types hang there in the warm parts of the year lots of beer drink and pretty girls and sunshine ..i used to drink in taverns when younger and met a lot of people there but most were not the happy kind of people i enjoy being around ...the best and oldest friends i have i met following the dead around .that and when i used to hitch hike [ been across the us 9 times on foot] like i said though get out for a few hours a day at least even if its just to the park or for a walk ..thats were i would start

[Lily420]

I find having friends a pest. Im someone who ares about everybody but when it comes to people not caring so much about me it just feels like a waste of time. Now my friends are more like aqaintances. I much perfur you guys to them.

I lost friends over stupid shit like i cant be friends witht hat person because my other friends dont like them or my friends want to try harder drugs but i wouldent give them any connections...its just stupid shit liek that that makes me wonder if anyone really is any good anymore.

If you find a good friend then hold on to them, people suck.

[sToNeDpEnGuIn420]

I know exactly what you mean. Like okay this year of school(coming up) i will bein 11th grade(lil behind on credits tho). Hmm okay well im just gonna go into my whole story...maybe it will help you(no im not trying to rip your thread or anything).

Okay well right now im 16 and going to be in 11th grade.I currently live in washington(the state). Well before i moved here i lived in so cal. I moved here right before 7th grade.Well my whole life i moved around every other grade. So im use to having to make new friends. At the time i moved up here i was really into magic the gathering(card game). So when i came up(it was literally the day before 7th grade we got here, cuz we drove).Anyways, so the next day i have to go to school. Of course its weird cuz theres not a single black person at the school, and only a few mexicans.(At this time im use to whites being the minorites). So after starting to go to school, i made like 1-2 friends and just hung with them the whole time at school. But once school got out i went to this card shop called gamequest.Gamequest was probably the best thing to happen to me.
So pretty much everyday around 4, id come to gamequest and just play magic all day(or board games or other games). I got to know everyone there and was really well liked. Well then a year passes and its now 8th grade. Im still playing magic, and even more into to it. So its the first tri of the year and i look at someones binder and i see he has a magic card on it(but it was a fake one made on the computer, that had totally outragous stats). So we start talking about it, and eventaully we deciede to hang out. Well i find out hes friends with all the skaters and some of them play magic. So after getting to know him and the rest of the skaters who played magic i started sitting at their table at lunch with them. This is when school started going good(8th grade was deff my favorite, just so many good times) Anyways, eventually by summer people started disliking magic so i also stopped playing. 8th grade summer was great, but after that it all started going down hill. Once 9th grade started and we went to high school EVERYTHING changed. At this time i wasnt really playing magic at all. All my 8th grade friends, had changed and all of them were trying to get with chicks. Well me and my long hair was still just triyng to have fun. So i started losing most my friends. Then in november i went back to so cal. And "re-met" this chick, whos name was cortnie. We hit it off really good when i went down there. So we deciede to keep in touch and try a long distance relationship thing. Well that didnt work and we ended up "breaking up" and this left me very depressed.(oh my first gf wasnt till the summer of 8th grade, i went out with her like most of summer but we only saw each other twice, rembeer it was my first relationship).So then i started getting even more deperessed. I started just becoming a hermit just staying home all the time just living in my room and playing on the computer. So everyone at school started calling me hermit and shit. Well my long hair didnt help to this. So i got even more depressed. I tried to kill myself a few times.And i started cutting. I went to counsleing and got put on anti deperessants.(this is all about....january-march. Then i end up cutting my hair and shit and start trying to be more social. So then its the last tri of 9th grade, its the begiing of april. Ive never smoked weed still(nor done any drug, always been scared). So im in english and this chick is high, and shes like no i dont do that..... and im like of course i dont do drugs either(jokingly) and shes like oh you smoke? and im like uhh yeah. So then her and her friend deciede we are gonna smoke, so they invite me. (her/my friend had never smoked neither had i, but i said i had) So we get on the bus and are going there. And on the bus im like guys....i lied ive never smoked. They didnt care, they are just like your dumb. So we go to her house and we get in her closet.She has a lil glass bowl. She takes a hit, the other chick does(coughs her brains out) Then i do, and i dont choke at all. i get about 2 more hits. THen we come out. Im just starting at all the shit on her wall, and shes like yelling at me. So anways after that i started smoking weed more. Then i started playing magic again. (Oh now i have no friends from 8th grade cuz they dont like me cuz i smoke weed). So i hang out with a diff set of ppl, in a badder part of town just smoking weed and shit all summer(This summer is the first itme i have sex).Oh also the beginging of 9th grade summer i moved out of my parents house and moved in with my grandma.(giving me more freedom). Then 10th grade comes around. So im still smoking weed, going stoned everyday. First tri goes by. Then second tri is here. I start skipping A LOT, only going 4th period and blah blah blah.(oh all my friends from 8th grade are back my friends, cuz they've come more acceptant to smoking weed, and thye drink with me and some smoke.) (oh i stop playing magic again too). So i end up basically dropping out for a week or two, and now im going to a new school, where i only go on mondays, and just get packets.(The reason i started going there is because i was fed up with all the stupid ppl at highschool). Then summer comes around(this summer) i start dealing, so my name and number gets around. So now ive got lots of friends(well ppl i deal to, but some are more and friends too). And here i am now.

[sToNeDpEnGuIn420]

^^ god damn i hope that makes you feel better, took like 20 mins to write.

[3 Sheets To The Wind]

Cool story Penguin, i;m sure many people won't bother to read it, as it's very long, but i want to get to know you and your past better, so yeh, that was basically your whole teenage life up to now on here.. sounds sort of the same as mine (apart from all the moving and playing magic and shit) as a lot of the people i considered best friends have deserted me, and now i only hang around with a few people, and they're lazy, always expecting me to go to their houses rather than them come to mine (free booze and fags, so it isn't all that bad)
So i hope i find some good friends when i go to college in September

[GHoSToKeR]

Awesome thread when there's this amount of stonage. :D Cool post, Penguin. :)

There was a point in my life when I always had loads of friends; they were all the 'cool' kids, but I didn't consider myself one... just a guy who hung with them. I dunno if that was true or not, and I don't care. I guess I just didn't ever feel like I totally fitted in. As far as I remember I was the first (or one of the first) out of all of us to smoke weed. Occasionally a friend would smoke a bit (it was usually the chicks) but I was the first 'stoner'. I instantly fell in weed, and even though I hung around with the same friends just the same, I was always then a bit 'different' because I smoked alot. Eventually, at parties and stuff, I met a load of stoners who were slightly older then me, and hung out with them most of the time.. it was awesome. For the first time in my life I had friends who enjoyed the same things as me, and the same music. But eventually my tastes started to change, and so did I, and gradually grew apart from them.. I went a while without many friends, or at least no close friends.. my 'social circle' seemed to me like just a bunch of random people. I became slightly depressed, and started occasionally doing speed and ecstacy, and got really into ecstacy.. I got to a point where me and friends were doing a few every Friday and Saturday... But I saw how fucking stupid I was being and then began to alienate what friends I had left. I stuck to weed from then on, and spent alot of time alone, but being really happy (probably coz of only smoking weed instead of getting wasted all the time) and doing the things I enjoy. That phase of my life went on for a while, until recently actually... I still have a load of friends, but they still just feel like acquiantances, as Lily so elegantly put it. But then through learning an instrument, joining a band and getting a new job i'm starting to go out alot more, and to socialise way more. But I still love getting stoned at home with some munchies and some really chill music... hehe :D

[ImStonedNILikeIt]

Thanks penguin for telling me all about your story. I feel a little bit better. I mean I see where your coming from.I dropped out of school when I was 16,and I kind of lost all of my friends when I did that, Except for one. We stayed friends forever because we were both stoners, well recently she stopped talking to me for reasons im not sure of yet, but we don't talk.I got used to the whole loner thing,and I hated people. Then I met my ex boyfriend,and we hung out a lot! I hung with his friends, got in his group, loved every minute of it. Then we broke up,and I moved away from there, and now i'm like back to the way things used to be.Lonely, except with a child once more. I don't like it, because I feel like the only conversation I have is with a 6month old child. I love spending time with him, but damn I just want some real friends, with real people,instead of a baby. My ex and I are still the best of friends but I rarely see him, and when I do see him. It's different, everyone kind of looks down on me now because he dumped me for a younger chick which they met,and like because she is an annoying little hot bitch, but as for me, I'm just a single mother who smokes a lot,and has no real life. I hate how one person could totally fuck up your life in just a matter of seconds, I guess I should've learned what my mom always said"Always depend on yourself to make yourself happy, keep yourself entertained because no one will stick around forever" Oh well..

I guess I should stop bein shy,and open up to people.Thanks everyone for trying to help.

[budbuzz420]

hehehe....nothing like a message board of loner stoners....well i fit in perfectly to the pity party....jk but i do. anyway im gonna be in 10th grade and god it sucks. i try to make friends but by now everyone is off in their own little clique and you cant be friends with them. so i basically started gettin depressed and all. almost killed myself on more than one occaision and things of that sort. anyway one thing that you might wanna try is chat. just click it at the top. the people here are mostly nice ive made a few friends and polished up on my social skills....try it out maybe it will work for ya


P.S. Stoned Penguin we are pretty much the same...i used to play mahic too but i entered a tournament at the local cardshop stoned and drunk and the owner was like your causin me trouble if i ever see you again i will call your parents....anyway peace

[Ocram]

I am convinced Born alone die alone yeah the Good o'l game of life i know how you all feel and it does suck at times... we gotta do what we gotta do so enjoy as much of it as you can cuz all times arent peachy...also now I am goin thru a period of hermetness....but that shall change in the near future I'm plannin on it...Hope for the best expect the worst and some things will be ok...this Joint is for you guys(lights up joint)....Later all enjoy!!!!

[RaoulDuke45]

im not to social but i have alot of friends, ive always been pretty shy and i make friends by being funny and playing sports, i made most of my really good friends playing football or basketball. i moved to a new school in 7th grade and hated all of junior high was a bit depressed in 7th for a while but in german class i was very social and made really good friends, but a good job is usally a great place to make friends

[rastabill89]

cool story penuglin dude though seriously ive read you talk about going on the bus and smoking in that girls closet right? im not going crazy or anything i hope

[MeatRulz]

i used to play magic in seventh grade and i stopped cause i hangout with black ppl and it just got gay anyway but anyway i have a lot of friends easiest way im thinkin of right now is get a job and get good friend there that smokes weed or somethin like that.

[4x4Turbo]

Okay. Here is my problem. People please respond. I'm really serious about this, It's kind of like..in all seriousness, but really funny.

Okay, How do you all become social?I don't mean social as in going around asking people to smoke one or anything like that. Just friends. I mean..How do you guys go out, make friends, and become what you are today? do you just blurt things out, or are you shy?OR is the computer the only friends you have?

I missed out on a lot of my social life because I hate people so damn much. But then today I realized. Where the hell am I?Here I sit online, with no real life friends, and what real life friends I do have, have their own lifes and don't pay much attention to me anymore.I'm not whinning or bitching, or anything. I'm just wondering. How do you guys do become so socially acceptable, or just talk to people in the real world. I'm really shy, and I'm 22 I'm a single mother, so people kind of look at me like "What the hell is she doing?" I don't know...

Please respond people..I'm serious for once. lol. :D


Are you in northern ky? I'm in cincy and we know how to have a good time :D

Not sure if your right across the river or not but if you are you should check out the night life in cincy. I'm a obsessed car enthusiast and there are always car meets going on every weekend in cincy. Motions night life was great last year. The main one right now is the CSR cruise in. Good turn out, decent music, pretty laid back. I love going their after smoking a couple blunts. Sounds like you need to get out more often :eek:
Not sure if thats your thing or not but to me its fun and pretty social.

[Ganj]

Okay. Here is my problem. People please respond. I'm really serious about this, It's kind of like..in all seriousness, but really funny.

Okay, How do you all become social?I don't mean social as in going around asking people to smoke one or anything like that. Just friends. I mean..How do you guys go out, make friends, and become what you are today? do you just blurt things out, or are you shy?OR is the computer the only friends you have?

I missed out on a lot of my social life because I hate people so damn much. But then today I realized. Where the hell am I?Here I sit online, with no real life friends, and what real life friends I do have, have their own lifes and don't pay much attention to me anymore.I'm not whinning or bitching, or anything. I'm just wondering. How do you guys do become so socially acceptable, or just talk to people in the real world. I'm really shy, and I'm 22 I'm a single mother, so people kind of look at me like "What the hell is she doing?" I don't know...

Please respond people..I'm serious for once. lol. :D


the key is not to be socially acceptable.

your 22 years old, if you haven't decided to get your life situated by now, when are you? who cares about having friends? you have a child to think about now. you don't need to be wondering what your friends are off doing, because unlike you, your friends have realized this...it's not hard to realize either. you have your own life , just like they do. i think it's time for you stop thinking about becoming socially acceptable and thinking about the precious, new life you have to help mold. i hope my words have helped you.

feel free to message me if you want to talk.

[ImStonedNILikeIt]

I've been to cincy before!I love that city!My ex boyfriend lives there. Ack. But it's a really cool place. I was around milford?I don't know if you know where that is but yea, I remember that place..

Ganj, you're right. I've always been independant,and Never reallly cared what others thought, guess i should go back to doing that.

Well thanks everyone1

[OzzyOz]

hmm well up untill this year ( 8th grade ) i didn't have too many good friends. Now, i know alot of people in my town and i many good friends in all different grades.


Schooling was the main reason for finding friends, you get so bored at school you need to hangout with someone in class to make the days go by quicker

[st0n3r]

my life is very random and i believe i am a very lucky person, haven't lost anyone incredibly close to me apart from my dog which i had for 15 years, i don't have any serious illness expect for depression which can be solved, i'm not a druggie or a alcoholic, all the drugs i take is hashish, cannabis and salvia. my friends live very close to me, but they are my closes buddies whenever i have a problem i can turn to them for advice, as well as my two brothers they fucking rock but they have been through ALOT of shit in there life so i guess i'm the lucky ones. my mum and dad live together, stable job, cosy house and hopefully i'm on my way to become a estimator on a construction site (once i can find a fucking apprientiship or something that will help me have experience, if anyone knows anything plz post about it below, ty)

well my social life has been like a say very random, wen i went 2 skool i met this guy called matt, was cool but now a total rat. his mum and dad are split and his dad lives in america. so for two summers i went to america, first time we went 4 six weeks, one week in phoenix, arizona, beautiful place, nice a hot, and the swimming resort rocks! then we went to the grand canyon, and afterwards had a nice long drive down to vegas for a few days, even though i'm only 17 i gambled a lil and drank a few beers lol. then for the rest of the time i was there we went back to matt's dad's house which was in littleton, colorado, we met a few friends, smoked out every nite, went to the ABC cinema like every nite and whneva we got hungry there woz a wendys, mcdonalds, kfc and a supermarket 2 minutes away, and also right behind the house there woz a huge park wiv a field and a skate ramps, it was reli beautiful we used 2 hang out there eveyr nite get stoned talk about life and there the times i miss.

then 4 the next summer i went to san antonio, texas 4 a week which woz abousetly amazing, we went to sea world, six flags, busch gardens and etc, and the temp woz 120 degrees pheww lol. and then for another 5 weeks we went back to colorado again, met our friends up again, which woz a reli amazing experience bcoz we haven't seen them in a year or so. but unfortunately my friend matt had fell out wiv his dad so he isn't in contact wiv him anymore so we can't go back and enjoy the good times.

the reason i'm telling you all this is to compare it to my life today, i work a 14:45-2200 shift on a sat, and a 07:30-12:30 on a sunday. mon-fri i have free due to the summer vacation, but whenever i go out, whether it's with friends, work buddies or etc, they just go down to the local park, not much fun but we have a reli reli big hill bout 75ft high, they just get drunk all the time, pick fights on ppl, insult one another, and most of them don't smoke with me which leaves just me and a few friends to smoke.

but currently i have got myself into bands with very good friends of mine, none of em smoke cannabis apart from myself and the lead singer who is pretty cool, so i have decided to hang about them more, even though my drummer can be a dick and reli piss me off which leads to my depression, but it's all good, we r close friends and we all get on like a house on fire.

so next time you say to have a reli big majority of friends, try and think. where ur best friends part of ur childhood like my band members? were they sumwhere on holiday which u always dream about? or is it a few indivudals who come ova ur house or go out wiv u 2 a quiet area gettin high with you? i'm not saying choose your friends wisely all i'm saying is that friendship can b decieving.

[4x4Turbo]

I've been to cincy before!I love that city!My ex boyfriend lives there. Ack. But it's a really cool place. I was around milford?I don't know if you know where that is but yea, I remember that place..

Ganj, you're right. I've always been independant,and Never reallly cared what others thought, guess i should go back to doing that.

Well thanks everyone1



Small world. I live in milford. :eek: If milford wasn't so green it would be a very boring place. We should smoke down if you ever plan on making a trip back up here.

[4252]

One of the best questions here in some time. Sorry if I become redundant; for once, I didn't actually read all the previous posts. It's Friday, I'm home from work, and getting stoned; so go figure.

Meeting people is the easiest, and also the hardest thing going, except for figuring out life, the universe, and everything.

If you just remember that most people are just like you, and would respond as you would, given the chance. If you're with a longtime friend, and start a conversation with something like "One brutal storm we had last night, your basement get flooded too?" It'd be perfectly natural. Why not say the same to a "stranger"? If you treat a stranger like a friend, they'll generally reciprocate. I found the best place to practice breaking ice is in a line at a store checkout counter, especially if something's holding things up. The person behind you has nothing better to do than talk to you (unless they're already talking to the person behind them). In that case, you just join the conversation.

Odd, but just yesterday I had lunch with a woman I didn't previously know, just because I'd had a few of those brief conversations in the line (at the pizza shop) a few times, and both she and I happened to be there alone that day. "Mind if I sit with you?" are often the most welcome words a person on their own would want to hear. And if they're not interested, no harm done.

So, in connecting with people, I guess the ground rules are; don't be afraid to speak to them, expect to get rejected from time to time and don't worry about it, and learn to read people as best you can (to avoid parasites, predators, etc.).

42

[jadeius]

well, just by looking at the title of your thread, i'd say i usually do it on my hands and knees, with my head buried in a pillow, but otherwise, no comment

[NOTEHOOK]

I think it just happens man. I was anti-social till about like 6 months ago and then I just changed and decided I wanted to hang out with people?? (btw i think anti-social is better life stressful now)

[KronicKyla]

I have never looked at myself as a very social person but everyone else would label me that way.

first things first being shy gets you know where.
People walk all over you! You need to let people know that you are here and your not going to put up with bullshit!

How would you change that you might ask?

I would try just adding in conversations that you wouldnt usually talk in. Like if someone is talking about something add in the conversation (even if its "oh that movie was great) at least people know that you are there!

Alot of my friends I have found from work. If you dont work now I would maybe try going to a club of somthing that intrest you so that you know people there would be there for the same reasons you would be ie. cake decorating, drawing or whatever intrest you.

[jadeius]

i just all of a sudden got social when i went off to college a few years ago...then i left the dorm life and decided to go the tech college route...it's less all up in your shit all the time, but you can still socialize and be who you always wanted to be in the first place

[ImStonedNILikeIt]

I'm not sure. I'm kind of shy, but when i'm around people I know..I'm like so talkative,and around other people I freeze up it's like I stutter when i talk sometimes and eevrything....

I didn't mind milford to much.And if i ever come that way again, of course I'd looove to toke up with you. Have u ever been to loveland?I went to the loveland castle around there. It was awesome.

[ilovebecky]

Im wicked shy too and i didnt have ANY friends at all and prozac helped with that it made me a lot more sociabal

[WeBB15]

Maybe when I get older and get my life going, I will come and be your friend... so if you ever see a random guy come up to you in like a couple years, remember this post :)

[fightingcock777]

find ppl that have the same interests as you. you shouldnt say whatever comes to your mind. think before you speak and remember that everyone takes things differnetly. you need to read others as best as you can so you know how they react. and just be yourself, ppl tend to act strange when they arent acting like theselves. acting strange like that could make other ppl feel ackward around you. you should be able to tell the best way to act from personal experiance.and if poeple dont repect u and shit on you, let them know that you dont like it and just say fuck em. and stick with the ppl that are similar to you.

[4x4Turbo]

I'm not sure. I'm kind of shy, but when i'm around people I know..I'm like so talkative,and around other people I freeze up it's like I stutter when i talk sometimes and eevrything....

I didn't mind milford to much.And if i ever come that way again, of course I'd looove to toke up with you. Have u ever been to loveland?I went to the loveland castle around there. It was awesome.


yep, been to the loveland castle. I go bridge jumping close to there. Just the other night i was in loveland down by the bridge all wasted. you get a huge rush jumping off a 80ft bridge into cold water. (maybe you've done it before but its new to me). It was pretty cool, saw a firework show PERFECTLY on top of the bridge while rolling a blunt for me and my girl, or ho, still havent decided what i should call her now.

Do you know of the "Eastgate 500"? or Ricegate. Well, let me know if you ever come up here, it would be cool to toke with someone on the boards that seems distant away.