The Sperm Bank Heist

[robert42]

The Sperm Bank Heist

A guy in a mask bursts into a sperm bank with a shotgun. "Open the goddamn safe" he yells at the girl behind the counter.

"But we're not a real bank" she replies, "we don't have any money, this is a sperm bank."

"Don't argue, open the goddamn safe or I'll blow your head off!" says the guy with the gun.

She obliges and once she's opened the safe door the guy says, "Take out one of the bottles and drink it."

"But it's full of sperm!" she replies nervously.

"Don't argue, just drink it!" he says.

She takes the cap off and gulps it down.

"Take out another one and drink it too," he demands.

She takes out another and drinks it as well. Suddenly the guy pulls off his mask and to the girl's amazement it's her husband.

"There", he says, "its not that fucking difficult is it!?!"

[robert42]

come on guys im sure sum1 gets it lol

[RIP ODB]

That's pretty funny bro, I love a good joke.

[BU5T4]

LOL, I liked it mate!!

[Ammie]

LMFAO!!!! thats classic:D:D

[robert42]

Two married blokes are out drinking one night. "i just dont know what else to do" says one to the other. "whenever i go home after w`ve been out drinking, i turn the headlights off before i get to the driveway, i shut off the engine and coast into the garage, i take my shoes off before i go in to the house, i sneak up the stairs, i get undressed in the bedroom, i ease into bed and my wife still wakes up and shouts "and what time do you call this ?"

His mate looks at him and says "well your obviously taking the wrong approach. I screach into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wifes arse and say, "how about a blowjob ? and she`s always sounds asleep."

[robert42]

Enjoy

[robert42]

LOL I LIEK THIS

[RESiNATE]

lol, Robert..quality pics lol
and cool jokies...the sperm-bank one was coolios, dude
:D:D:D

[robert42]

heheh ty res

feel free to post other funny stuff ppl

ill post sum more funny shit later i got sum really funny stuff. ;)

PEACE IN THE MIDDLE EAST

[ermitonto]

...

[J4ay20]

check these pics out. kinda trippy

[Hektik]

rofl, good one

[apsinthion]

The newly born sperm was receiving instructions in
conception from the instructor. "As soon as you hear the
siren, run for the tunnel and swim in a straight line until
you get to the entrance of a damp cavern. At the end of the
cavern you will find a red, sticky ball which is the egg.
Address it and say, 'I'm a Sperm.' She will answer, 'I'm an
Egg.' From that moment on you will work together to create
the embryo. Do you understand?"

The sperm nodded affirmatively.

Two days later, the sperm is taking a nap when he hears the
siren. He wakes immediately and runs to the tunnel. A
multitude of sperm swim behind him. He knows he has to arrive
first. When he nears the entrance to the cavern, he looks
back and sees that he is far ahead of the other sperm. He is
able to swim at a slower pace but does approach the red,
sticky ball.

When, at last, he reaches the red, sticky ball, he smiles
and says, "Hi, I'm a sperm!"

The red sticky ball smiles and says, "Hi. I'm a tonsil." :D

[maryjanemama]

My friend took this pic on her way to work last summer...:) A picture says a thousand words rings so true sometimes.

Hahaha, Asp, good one.

[Alwaysstoned]

wow thanks u made my laugh

[Ammie]

LOL!!! this thread just keeps gettin funnier :D:D

[slipnslide087]

damn.....this is going to be weak bc im lazy, but just picture it.....i saw it online somewhere. but theres a liquor store and its called. "BUNGHOLE LIQUORS" i know thats not funny at all without the pic.....wtf whatever

[slipnslide087]

like pretend you just drove by it................still no???.....damn....from now on ill just post the pic, or nothing at all.

[robert42]

lmfao i love it i love it all keep it comin i got sum goodens cumin in a bit ;);)

[jacquelyne]

LOL FUNNY

[Climbing High]

some of thos epics are hilarious. heres one i thought was pretty funny.

[Climbing High]

just found this one on google

[Climbing High]

here it is

[OzzyOz]

haha
that was a good joke.

[maryjanemama]

Another pic from Mandy on her way to work...I can think of about 100 better ways to transport tires. :D This was the best one this guy could come up with.

[Looker]

YES THAT WAS FUNNY