Aw shit Vapordaddy, sounds like you've got a big project ahead of you, and there's a long talk with your wife that you need to have.
Look at this as an opportunity to not only change your career for the better, but to also bring more communication to your marriage.
Another thing I would look into is cooking at a college or private boarding-school... the food services there don't keep late restaurant hours... benefits are often very good... opportunities to network with caterers abound...????