young parents irresponsible?

[Chronic Chrissy]

thats not exactly what i meant, i dont give a fuck what people think about me, but society groups me in with all the rest of the irresponsible teenagers, like if i can have my own house, have my own car, have a kid, be a good parent, be a good husband, work a 9-5, be in college and so many other things, why cant i go buy me a pack of newports or a rillo when i need one? they can send you to war at 18, you can go fuckin lose your leg or arm for your country and then cant even come back and enjoy a drink or anything?

So you are mad because you can't buy booze or smokes but you can own a house and go to war at 18?:wtf: WTF does that have to do with being a good parent. In my opinion when you become a parent the smoking goes out the window and the drinking turns into one or two glasses a week with your spouse to do something special on the weekend. How can you afford smokes and booze while finishing school, even if you have a full time job you can' squeeze the extra money for you extras unless you take money away from what the baby and your partner need. If you really want to know the thruth I didn't just move out one day la di da. I went throught court systems and CFS, I fought hard to move out and became emancipated, which freed me from my parents custody and granted me my own gaurdianship. I was given a special little card that allowed me to sign legal documents and take advantage of what adults here had the right to, which ment I could also walk into a bar at 16 and buy a drink. Took a while to explain, show my card and get verification from the government that I was indeed allowed, it was a lengthy process but after a few faxes I could go out to the bar. But I worked my ass off getting that little card, signing contracts that said I would finish school or be charged with fruad.


Here 18 is the magic number and I think that is wrong. I would prefer the drinking age be 21 because most of the time anyone I've ever seen drinking under that age has abused alcohol, getting right wasted and doing very irresponsible things. Yes people over 21 drink irresponsibly too but not in the mass numbers all collected in one place, and not till they pass out and do stupid shit they don't even remember. The other thing too is the having 18 the age makes it easier for 15 and 16 year olds to get into the bar and buy stuff. After a while of fucking with the long process of the card I just picked up a fake ID and my problems getting into bars was solved.

So here's the question. How old are you? How old is your child? What's your living arrangment with your family(spouse and child)? Have finished highschool? Do you support your spouse and child fully, or do you and your spouse at least support your family soully without the help of others for money? Do you live in a safe area of town? DO you protect your child from smoking and being in the presence of intoxicated people? Do you spend all the free time you have with your child because you want to?

Just having a baby and a place to live doesn't make you a responsible parent or bring you closer to being an adult. A crack hoar can pop out 5 kids in four years and live in a car, doesn't make her a responsible adult.

You tell us the whole situation and we'll tell you if you're a responsible parent. Don't come here and whine because you can't buy smokes and booze, and because society has created a steriotype which you are judged upon.

I walked across the stage to recieve my diploma with honors on top of it, 8 months pregnant. People didn't see a home owner with a job and husband, people saw a teenage who made it just in time. I remember hearing the whispers as I walked up there, the whole room was humming. My family video taped it and won't let me see it because it picked up comments from people in the audience. I know about steriotyping and hold my head high against it. It still happens in stores or going for walks, or just getting out. It doesn't matter to me. What matters to me is how much happy time and love I invest in my child and teaching my child to break away from the blind society and see life for what it is.

I'm done rambling. I though you were a proud young parent who was a little down by glares and whispers. Not some kid crying about wanting to drink and smoke.:wtf:

[JeenYuss]

So you are mad because you can't buy booze or smokes but you can own a house and go to war at 18?:wtf: WTF does that have to do with being a good parent. In my opinion when you become a parent the smoking goes out the window and the drinking turns into one or two glasses a week with your spouse to do something special on the weekend. How can you afford smokes and booze while finishing school, even if you have a full time job you can' squeeze the extra money for you extras unless you take money away from what the baby and your partner need. If you really want to know the thruth I didn't just move out one day la di da. I went throught court systems and CFS, I fought hard to move out and became emancipated, which freed me from my parents custody and granted me my own gaurdianship. I was given a special little card that allowed me to sign legal documents and take advantage of what adults here had the right to, which ment I could also walk into a bar at 16 and buy a drink. Took a while to explain, show my card and get verification from the government that I was indeed allowed, it was a lengthy process but after a few faxes I could go out to the bar. But I worked my ass off getting that little card, signing contracts that said I would finish school or be charged with fruad.


Here 18 is the magic number and I think that is wrong. I would prefer the drinking age be 21 because most of the time anyone I've ever seen drinking under that age has abused alcohol, getting right wasted and doing very irresponsible things. Yes people over 21 drink irresponsibly too but not in the mass numbers all collected in one place, and not till they pass out and do stupid shit they don't even remember. The other thing too is the having 18 the age makes it easier for 15 and 16 year olds to get into the bar and buy stuff. After a while of fucking with the long process of the card I just picked up a fake ID and my problems getting into bars was solved.

So here's the question. How old are you? How old is your child? What's your living arrangment with your family(spouse and child)? Have finished highschool? Do you support your spouse and child fully, or do you and your spouse at least support your family soully without the help of others for money? Do you live in a safe area of town? DO you protect your child from smoking and being in the presence of intoxicated people? Do you spend all the free time you have with your child because you want to?

Just having a baby and a place to live doesn't make you a responsible parent or bring you closer to being an adult. A crack hoar can pop out 5 kids in four years and live in a car, doesn't make her a responsible adult.

You tell us the whole situation and we'll tell you if you're a responsible parent. Don't come here and whine because you can't buy smokes and booze, and because society has created a steriotype which you are judged upon.

I walked across the stage to recieve my diploma with honors on top of it, 8 months pregnant. People didn't see a home owner with a job and husband, people saw a teenage who made it just in time. I remember hearing the whispers as I walked up there, the whole room was humming. My family video taped it and won't let me see it because it picked up comments from people in the audience. I know about steriotyping and hold my head high against it. It still happens in stores or going for walks, or just getting out. It doesn't matter to me. What matters to me is how much happy time and love I invest in my child and teaching my child to break away from the blind society and see life for what it is.

I'm done rambling. I though you were a proud young parent who was a little down by glares and whispers. Not some kid crying about wanting to drink and smoke.:wtf:

i would have a response if that had any relevance to what i was trying to say...

the only thing i really have to say about the whole thing is smoking out the window when you have a kid? fuck no

smoking is not wrong, bad, impractival, or immoral, if my child wants to smoke when he gets older(like mid teens) i wont have a problem with it

also i do not have a kid, i dont see where anywhere i stated that i had a child or anything of the sort

oh yeah, one more thing, money is not an issue, the crack whore thing was a bad example because i stated "have kid, have house, be good parent"

im 16 and a half million dollar home is well within my price range

[TheSmokingMonkey]

I think they can be responsible parents, but they often compromise their own well-being in the process. Of course it is better to wait, but it is possible to be a good teen mother.

[VaporDaddy]

IMO being a good parent is the most difficult thing to do(also the most important job you will ever have), even for a mature, experienced adult.
I was mature for my age as a teen but I was nowhere near ready to handle the GIGANTIC responsibility of parenthood. Though I might have thought otherwise at the time.

[Fengzi]

im 16 and a half million dollar home is well within my price range

What, may I ask, do you do at 16 that puts a $500k home within your price range? Do you know what it takes to be able to afford a $500k home at today's interest rates? Not trying to argue with you but that would put your income well over the median income for the country.

[Breukelen advocaat]

What, may I ask, do you do at 16 that puts a $500k home within your price range? Do you know what it takes to be able to afford a $500k home at today's interest rates? Not trying to argue with you but that would put your income well over the median income for the country.

The house probably has to be on the reservation. When the casino laws change, profits drop, casino closes down, he can't afford the payments, or something else, there goes the house.

[Fengzi]

Yeah, I reread the entire thread and saw that once he gets married he and his wife are supposed to be pulling in $120k per year, just for living on the reservation. LOL, it must be nice. Still, I don't really count that as being able to say that a $500K house in well within his range. At today's interest rates, if he had outstanding credit (impossible at 16), $500k would probably be at the very top of the range. Maybe, and that's assuming any lender is going to give a 16yo kid a loan for that much. Which, given the curent sub-prime mortgage debacle, isn't likely. Not to mention the fact that, as you point out, he probably has to stay on the reservation.

I think this is actually a good example of why 15-16 year olds aren't likely to be good parents. They think they know enough about life, money, having kids, etc. But they really don't. There is a lack of wisdom about the big wide world that only comes with age. They don't want to admit it, but they will, once they turn 25 or 30. We've all been there, at 15 and 16 we thought we know it all. By the time your 30 you realize you didn't know shit. It just takes getting out there and getting repeatedly bitch slapped by reality to make us realize it.

Don't get me wrong Jeenyuss, I'm not questioning your integrity, character, or intentions. I'm just saying that more often than not, life has a way of fucking things up and making them turn out differently than expected. In my opinion, until a person has experienced enough of this, and come to terms with it, they shouldn't be a parent. Hell, it took me until I was 34 before I was ready.

[Chronic Chrissy]

I think this is actually a good example of why 15-16 year olds aren't likely to be good parents. They think they know enough about life, money, having kids, etc. But they really don't. There is a lack of wisdom about the big wide world that only comes with age. They don't want to admit it, but they will, once they turn 25 or 30. We've all been there, at 15 and 16 we thought we know it all. By the time your 30 you realize you didn't know shit. It just takes getting out there and getting repeatedly bitch slapped by reality to make us realize it.

I had a friend my age, moving out for the first time come to me to help her buy things like towels, dish rack, shower curtain, kinda stock up for her new place. She expected to buy everything she needed for like $70. Then I broke everything down for her, and got into other costs of living on her own that she "overlooked". I couldn't believe that she didn't know anything about simple household responsibilities such as cleaning, chores, cooking and eating properly, and basic maintinance(such as vacuuming her carpet to keep it clean:wtf: ). They also don't seem to understand that single dollars add up and hidden charges are everywhere. Sure the better chips only $.50 more but add $.10-$.50 for every item in the cart and they have no money left after groceries. I think at some point in time teenagers could make adult lives for themselves and been prepared but in todays society we have lost the value, foundation, and respect when it comes to our children that prevents them from assuming the responsibility that at one point would be given to a child at that age. Whether we hold it back or they fuck it up, the children of this society are no longer though capible of handling such. There was a time where children did the workings of the family and household while parents provided for and guilded them. Children cooked, cleaned, raised other children, and educated eachother effectively because it was a way of life, now chances are an adult in their early twentys can't manage the lifeload that a 10year old in the past once dilivered upon. Anyways we've created the downfall of society which is currently degenerating and we are letting it run with out any resistence.

[Breukelen advocaat]

........in todays society we have lost the value, foundation, and respect when it comes to our children that prevents them from assuming the responsibility that at one point would be given to a child at that age. Whether we hold it back or they fuck it up, the children of this society are no longer though capible of handling such. There was a time where children did the workings of the family and household while parents provided for and guilded them. Children cooked, cleaned, raised other children, and educated eachother effectively because it was a way of life, now chances are an adult in their early twentys can't manage the lifeload that a 10year old in the past once dilivered upon. Anyways we've created the downfall of society which is currently degenerating and we are letting it run with out any resistence.

Agreed!

Children in North American pioneer days were expected to do adult tasks - and usually did. One of my 4th great grandfathers, when he was thirteen, drove a wagon filled with his families' goods and belongings, pulled by oxen, solo through the wilderness of the Catskill mountains, because his parents and the rest of the family, including young children, were able to take an easier route. They started in Massachusetts. This boy was only about 13 years old at the time - the 1780's. I couldn't do something like that today!

[friendowl]

no matter who says what
any kid that had a kid will be hard timing

all parents no matter what age at soem point are irresponsible
no one is perfect

the only way to learn is by fucking up
too bad it has to be at the expense of a childhood