Oh yeah, we get the Asshole going for sure. Add in a little Beirut...good times. And damn man, either the clear cards were coming your way, or your friends don't know how to play very good haha.

And Slip, I'm liking the nice metaphor at the end.

Edit: LOL, the rejection hotline...that shits classic. It's going in the cell. And umm...yeah...that area code looks pretty familiar...