back when i was about 17 or 18, me and a friend of mine had made a long ass pipe out of one of those lamps that's about 5-6 feet tall and faces the ceiling. one person had to stand at the other end and hold it up while lighting the bowl for you and working the carb. the bowl was about 3-4 inches from the end of the pipe. anyhow, my friend was smoking and i was holding/lighting. i couldn't get my hand to seal off the carb end tight enough for him to get a good hit. (we're on his front porch by the way) so he looks down and there's this rag chillin' on his porch. he grabs it and hands it to me quickly and says "use this to plug the end". so i do as he requests, without question, and proceed to light the bowl. he takes a massive hit, and apparently the bowl got so hot, or the flame traveled through the stem of the bowl and just close enough to ignite the KEROSENE that ended up being on the rag. that mother fucker puked his ass off for a good 2 minutes. he'd inhaled all the burnt fumes from that rag. lmao. i couldn't help but laugh at his poor, stupid ass.

also, when i was a kid, i put a wig on my brother's head and pretended to be a barber. i was cutting his "hair" when i accidentally snipped the top of his left ear off. his face turned purple as he screamed bloody murder. i freaked the fuck out and just sat there staring at him. got into a bit of trouble over that one.