ok, i'm back....

[tootsie roll]

first and foremost i'd like to apologize to my friends and anyone who took out any concern on me.... the last couple of years have been really rough to me, and i've done a fairly good job, not bringing it to the boards, or pretty much, just keeping it all to myself.. but over the last few months.. i've kinda broke down more... and i can't just keep it quite anymore... i don't have any friends anymore, except for one person and i don't really talk to him anymore (since i quit playing FFXI) so i really dunno where to go wtih my problems....

it's not an excuse for my behavior.... just an explination... and i'm going to try very hard to not do stupid shit... if i have a problem, i still may come here looking for answers, but no more of this over dramatic shit...

as for my brother, i've talked to him, long extensive talks... and we've worked it out... basicly he's goign to do whatever he can, to not go and get enlisted, because the only reasons he wants to is to join, is for money, and to get out of my moms house.. and he has tried to get jobs, he's went all over, and no one's even expressing intrest, which is why he turned to this.... but he's got someone who's willing to take him in until he can find a job, and he's also going to go to some program like job corps... and then if all fails, even tho it still upsets me and i'm not happy with it, he will enlist... and i will support him in it...

i just lost all control because the prospect of losing another brother, was way too much for me to handle... it took alot of thought, and alot of talking, but like i said, i've worked it out now.... if something equally as distrubing happens in the future, i promise to only mention it and get advice, and sleep on the matter before i even begin to think of making a huge deal out of it... i've come to the conclusion excited thinking does no one any good, so i will only begin to think to make a big deal out of anything, after i've had some rational thought time put into it...

again, i'm sorry to my friends, and anyone that worried about me....

So very happy that you are feeling better and more in control.

My life has been far from a bed of roses too. Many important losses at an early age....unrelenting, unforgiving depression and a thing called transient global amnesia. Plus a host of other fun stuff.
Thankfully, I have a wonderful husband who adores me for all my flaws. Like you have Snookums. :jointsmile:
If you ever want to talk via aim, let me know and I'll add you. Ok?

[tootsie roll]

:s4:

i'm not that hard to please...

don't steal from me, don't lie to me, don't use/ignore me... that's about it maybe throw some bud in once in awhile if you want some extra points

That works for me too. lol

You are sounding good slip!

[slipknotpsycho]

i appreciate the thought tootsie, but i don't get on aim, or use any messangers...

[slipknotpsycho]

Walked a fine line, slipped the edge under me
Rise above a suicide, taking it out of me
Got a feeling, it's going far away, yeah
Licking the wounds from yesterday

Gonna fly, taken my time, strip down to nothing
Gonna try, but there's no rest for the wicked

Been through the skin of a dragon a thousand times
In every day I live for you, still I'm not alive
Got a feeling, I'm gonna fall away
Gimme a sign, one reason that I should stay

Gonna fly, taken my time, strip down to nothing
Gonna try, but there's no rest for the wicked
Gonna fly, take my time, strip down to nothing
Gonna try, but there's no rest for the wicked

Are you ready to know just who I am?
Do you think you can make me a better man?
Crack me open, expose me to your ways
Ignorance and arrogance on my way
Oh yea
No rest for the wicked baby!

Gonna fly, take my time, strip down to nothing
Gonna try, but there's no rest for the wicked
Gonna fly, take my time, strip down to nothing
Gonna try, but there's no rest for the wicked


seems these lyrics, make alot of sense, as of recent.