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02-02-2007, 07:34 AM #12Senior Member
why are we humans and why are we here
damn, you guys are a total buzz kill...
ok, let ME tell YOU why we are human, and what human means...
ok, one day ancient aliens decided that they were tired of doing physical labor. for thousands of years they had been creating machines to carry them throughout the universe, but they still had to clean toilets and take out trash, and mow lawns... all this stuff made the poor little aleins tired.
so one day, an alien was sitting back in his recliner, ripping the bong, when it occured to him...
"oh shit! we can make superstrong clones of ourselves to do all the dirty work. yeah, and we'll call em humans! (human in alien tounge means alien... if that makes sense)"
so, years go by and clone armies are created. but there was one prob... the humans didn't want to do the fxxx'd up work either. they went on strike and rioted and caused all kinds of probs. so they took these humans to a desserted planet called "EARTH", and dropped them out and left them for dead.
meanwhile, the aliens were hard at work on creating a stable strain of humans. they built in cannabinoid receptors into their brains, hoping the great herb would calm the quarrel whithin the mean mutant humans. these clones were intelligent, philosophical, and just plain hilarious to be around... but, they were so couchlocked they couldn't get the work done. and the expense of the munchy bill was atrocious!
so, the aliens transported these humans to earth too, to get rid of the hassle, and be done with the stoner jokes. then, the aliens transplanted pot plants all over the globe, so the humans wouldn't anhialate each other completely (mean humans vs stoner humans = no more humans) THEN they went back to their home planet, and continue to watch us and study our behaviour. they are completely baffled as to why the blessed herb has been made illegal in many parts of the planet, as they put it here for us to mellow out on, which is why there are crop circles; they drop off new updated super clones (ie Bill Gates, Marc Emery) to help restore the ballance, and to gain inside intel... every time a crop circle is found, you can bet that a new alien-modified human clone has been sucessfully delivered. sometimes, they send a bad clone (ie Micheal Jackson), but usually, they send one who helps the greater good.
soo, there it is, why we are humans, and why we are here.
yer welcome
Sky :abduct:
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