No Dutch my oldest is not home (I wish)
I have 3 sons...the youngest came home. He is in college.


Thanks for the well wishes though. Thanks everyone...

Demeter thanks for sharing your story it really helped me on so many levels. I AM STILL saying why and what could I have done...over and over.
I borrowed a quote from your post for my signature I thought it explained this place really well. I hope you don't mind.

Some times I have this fear of being alone but then I can find solace in being alone. It makes no sense.

Yesterday I found myself alone. SO really alone. . I really panicked. The house was so empty I just fell to pieces. Me and the cats on the floor. Me crying and them looking at me like I was crazy but with concerned little faces. Bless their little furry butts.
I guess this is empty nest in overdrive. Maybe that is why Smudge (my cat) brought me a dead bird. It was a nice gesture but it didn't help AT ALL.

I am glad I could come here and open my heart.
I feel a connection to this place and the hearts that collect here.
I have posted on lots of forums but there is no better collection of good people than here.

I guess I am off to Virginia Beach, I'll find my way back. Talk to you soon

Much love
Cat