So my son asked me about marijuana

[ValkyrieAg]

Though I agree that marijuana is wrongly portrayed in anti-drug messages and kids are lied to...you don't want to risk introducing it to him too young.

I think that a kid gets curious about sex way before he/she ever is confronted with marijuana. Sex obviously is a bigger and separate issue.

I agree with an above post that said it was better for the children to be ignorant until they reach a certain age.

If you use for medical reasons, thats good and fine. I have no problem with a 10 year old saying "my daddy uses marijuana for his condition".

But like we were taking about strange kids offering MJ then meth....yes other kids have an impact, but a parent has 10x the influence.

I remember an anti drug discussion in HS class one time about marijuana. I had only used it once or twice and wasn't really that impressed with it. A few guys in my class who were smokers weren't taking any of that 'MJ is a bad drug' bullshit. However, they are probably the dumbest guys I'll ever meet. I chose to stay away from MJ.

Now I am in college nearing a degree and I smoke like there is no tomorrow. I *never* refuse a hit. I stay until the blunt is finished even if I have to finish it myself. My point is, I think it is better for kids to be ignorant about it as long as possible.....for their own sake. I would probably cry if my child started using regularly before he even got a high school diploma.

I have more respect for a 16 year old boring no common sense bookworm that will probably never get any ass until he buys it than a 16 year old 'intelligent' full of common sense kid that can't graduate cause he is stoned all the time.

Like i said, marijuana shouldn't be introduced, it should be discovered. Discovered on your own terms just like life, sex, music, religion, and god.

[JunkYard]

If you had a child and he/she asked you about marijuna what would you do? Lie, and tell them it's a bad and dangerous drug, or would you be honest? I think we should give kids a little more credit, valkrie. Introducing them to it is one thing, but being honest when they ask is quite another.

I don't smoke medically per se, but I do smoke to relax at night when my son is at his mothers. When he's here, I spend my time with him, and we have some really good discussions. The other night when we were talking, he looked at me and said "I love talking to you, dad" I don't know about you, but that made me feel really good, and appreciated.

I have no worries about my son smoking MJ at an early age. Why? Because I sat down with him in a non-judgemental way, and discussed the issue intelligently. I didn't freak out and call it a devil drug, nor did I condone the use of it. I did however talk to him about it being used and prescribed by doctors for medicinal purposes in some places.

I told him I totaly support it being decriminalized, and that he should wait until it's legal before he ever considers trying it (If ever). He actually told me after we talked about the penalties if caught that he'll never use it just because of this, but at the same time, he wants to push for legalization like me.

We also talked about the dangers of smoking at a young age (before 18) and how it could effect his mental state. He knows it's not as danerous as cigs, or alcohol, but he also knows it can have some negative effects on him, which is another reason I'm at ease. He's very health conscious, and he doesn't do things that could harm him. He makes me go outside when I smoke a cig, and he despises alcohol. He knows these things are dangerous, as is MJ when you take into account the legal ramifications of being caught.

I'm in favor of being honest with my child, valkrie. He knows I once smoked MJ, he knows I've been to jail, he knows a lot of things about me, and that's the way it should be. Better he learn these things from me than from someone else. He will ultimately decide for himself, but I can at least be a guide and example for him.

As for being that example.. ..I NEVER smoke when he's at my home, I never drink when he's at my home, and I would never ever encourage him to break the law. I walk in a manner worthy of his admiration, and as far as he's concerned, I am a law abiding citizen just trying to make a difference in the live's of those who would benefit from MJ being legal. To him, I am an activist, and someone he can look up to. My cannabis mags are simple research, and if I didn't whole heartedly believe in the benefits of cannabis, I would have done what you'd do, and keep the facts from him, lie, and allow him to stay ignorant.

MJ is not just a recreational drug to get high on, but a valid, and much needed medication. I use it to relax so I can sleep at night. I've suffered from insomnia for years, and when I don't get my sleep I get quite mental, lol! You don't want to be around me when I haven't slept for a day or two.. ..I'm a beast, arrogant and on a full blown warpath w/o my sleep. Worse than being on a whiskey drunk even.. ..

As for the kids who smoke at an early age. (14 -17) Do you honestly believe that none of them do well in school? Please, that is such an unfair assesment on your part. Many, if not most make excellent marks in school and further their studies at a university of some sort. I'd say there are more highschool 'dropouts' who don't smoke weed than do. I'd like to see some statistics on this just to cast down these kind of assumptions.

As for the dumb remark about those kids who stood for what they believed in, you should be ashamed. At least they had the courage to go against the grain. They may have been dumb.. ..I don't know but who are you to call it like that? You're sitting here suggesting to let our kids live in ignorance, and to let them "discover" drugs on their own. That's complete nonsense!

w/o being properly educated on drugs who knows what they'll get into. Meth? Heroin? Cocain? Let other people teach them then you risk them being fed false information, and they'll see straight through it.

You seem to under estimate the power of peer pressure and lack of parental influence, you got to lay a foundation, and a trust relationship early on as a parent, or you'll lose their respect, and they'll never listen to you. They will give you a big FUCK YOU and do what they want anyway. I say teach them when they ask, an be as honest as you can be. If they don't ask, then maybe you should consider being a little more open minded around them, so they feel thay can at least talk to you about these delicate issues w/o fear of being ridiculed. I'm honest with my kid, and I expect him to be honest with me. Trust is a wonderful thing when appropriately utilized....


Junk~

[marvelous22]

Ha that shit is great! Spark him up wene he turns 16 thats a good age to try it.

[stinkyattic]

I would let him/her live in blissfull ignorance thinking that marijuana is bad for you, and eventually have a normal talk with them when they are considerably older. Kids that age don't need to know anything about marijuana, they should have toys and stuff on their minds nit drugs lmao.
!

In an ideal world maybe... but this world is full of references to drugs of all sorts and it is best that a child learn from a parent first, and then see the references differently, than just finidng out along the way, and looking at the PARENT'S opinion differently...they TOTALLY should have toys on their minds!!!
I mean, when we see kids on here bragging that they were smoking at 7, and other kids trying to grow in mom's house at 14, and then remember that kid juicyfruit who had in his SIG for God's sake that he was 14 and a list of all the drugs he had tried and the ones he still WANTED to try, that included some fucked up shit, I'll bet his parents never talked to him honestly about drugs!
I guess it's the same about the birds and the bees... wait until they are 16, and guess what? It's too late, your kid has already gotten some other kid pregnant.

[afghooey]

You have a lucky kid, Junkyard. I don't doubt that he'll respect you more in the long run for being open with him about subjects like this.

I had some guidance from an older cousin of mine about weed and other drugs when I was about your son's age (maybe a little older), and I have to say if I hadn't had any sort of guidance outside of D.A.R.E. (ha ha), I quite possibly would have gone on to do harder drugs than weed, just out of the same curiosity that got me to try marijuana (IMO, the frame of mind comes before the drug, and the gateway theory is a crock). Thanks to having a dependable mentor and places like Erowid, I've been able to educate myself and make responsible decisions about what I put into my body.

I totally agree with you that parents should be honest with their kids, and not brush them off or lie to them to keep them from trying pot, or anything for that matter. Even if you lie to your child with 100% good intentions, when they find out (and chances are they will) they'll probably lose a considerable amount of respect for you, and possibly do worse things just to spite you, or to find out by experimentation whether they've been lied to about other things.

Even if the truth is fucked up, honesty is the best policy. Because a fucked-up truth, when concealed, is an even MORE fucked up lie.

Like if your kid is adopted. I think it'd be better to tell them early on, as screwed up as it might be for a kid to deal with, than stow it as some ugly secret to be possibly revealed later on in adolesence (just when a kid really needs more identity issues to deal with).

Candor > Deceit, by far. When it comes to everyone, really, but ESPECIALLY when it comes to kids.

[PatrickHenry]

I'm in my 20s and just found out my dad smokes. He has really bad back pain and it helps him get through it. I just never realized he used it til I told him that I did. After that he told me everything, including the strains they smoked and everything. He was talking about Alcupulco Gold. HAHA Nothing like hearing your dad say "sinsemilla" for the first time.

[stinkyattic]

Nothing like hearing your dad say "sinsemilla" for the first time.

lol I'm still waiting for my stepfather to 'fess up... 20 years later... the guy used to be a park ranger, ski patroller, general outdoor geeky guy... I've met his ole skiin' buddies... please...

[JunkYard]

You have a lucky kid, Junkyard. I don't doubt that he'll respect you more in the long run for being open with him about subjects like this.

Thanks, afghooey. I remember the time I came to my dad about drugs, and you know what he told me?
He said, "If you ever get involved with drugs, I'll beat you!" That's it, no info, no talk.. ..just a threat of violence, lol! You know what I did? I gave him a big FUCK YOU and tried everything I could get my hands on just for spite. I ended up in jail a few times, and developed a bad powder addiction.

I regret it now because he (My dad) has disowned me, AND his grandson, but you learn from your mistakes, and from the mistakes of others. I swore to myself that I'd never be like my father, and that Id be a guide instead of a power tripping over zealous uninformed POS like my dad was.

My son called him the other day, and my dad wouldn't even talk to him. It was Christmas for Gods sake, and my dad, because of me wouldn't even allow my son the pleasure of wishing him a merry christmas.

Sad stuff, man!

I had some guidance from an older cousin of mine about weed and other drugs when I was about your son's age (maybe a little older), and I have to say if I hadn't had any sort of guidance outside of D.A.R.E. (ha ha), I quite possibly would have gone on to do harder drugs than weed, just out of the same curiosity that got me to try marijuana (IMO, the frame of mind comes before the drug, and the gateway theory is a crock). Thanks to having a dependable mentor and places like Erowid, I've been able to educate myself and make responsible decisions about what I put into my body.

I had absoluely no guidence whatsoever, and you see what I did, lo! I think it's important to be a teacher, and lead instead allowing kids to simply discover. Children need guidence pure and simple, they need someone open minded and honest, too. I worked with troubled kids for several years, and learned a great deal during this time. We had atleast one 3 hour class every week where they would teach us to utilize trust, and compassion, and tolerance.

These kids were beaten by their parents, and abused in ways you couldn't imagine. It would take years sometimes just to get a trust relationship established with them, and when they finally came to grips with reality, started trusting adults again, we'd ship them off to go live on their own, or in some foster home with complete strangers. I loved that job, but I couldn't handle it when these kids were shipped off somewhere else. It broke my heart, ghooey! I ended up quiting the job, and I started driving a cab, lol!

The point I'm trying to make, is it wasn't until my later years that I myself was guided, and that I learned about developing trust foundations. Trust is an amazing thing when utilized appropriatly. I think parents should consider this before their children get old enough to ask the hard questions.

I totally agree with you that parents should be honest with their kids, and not brush them off or lie to them to keep them from trying pot, or anything for that matter. Even if you lie to your child with 100% good intentions, when they find out (and chances are they will) they'll probably lose a considerable amount of respect for you, and possibly do worse things just to spite you, or to find out by experimentation whether they've been lied to about other things.

^^You nailed it afghooey!^^ Even so, I'm not ready to let my kid know that I smoke MJ. When he's older, after he's done his fair share of research, and is able to keep things quite, Ill confess, but until then, it's hush hush.


Junk~

[PatrickHenry]

lol I'm still waiting for my stepfather to 'fess up... 20 years later... the guy used to be a park ranger, ski patroller, general outdoor geeky guy... I've met his ole skiin' buddies... please...

You should ask. Old stoner stories are the best.

[ValkyrieAg]

Well kids might be smarter than we give them credit for, they are just little people after all, but they don't have the experience.

And I never said that kids that smoke pot never make it to college.....who do you think I smoke with? :jointsmile: I am just saying that it happens all too often.

Yes those guys in high school were notorious idiots and quite the example. When i say discover, I don't mean like they don't know what they are doing. I mean they experience it on their own terms. I 'discovered' it on my own, I was ignorant but I tried it and years later (now) i have picked it up without looking back. I *NOW* understand how it can be beneficial and enjoyable for recreational uses and medcinal purposes. Why? Because I am old enough to grasp the concept. If you handed me a 'marijuana joint' when I was 10 years old, I would probably think you were the devil himself. Keep marijuana out of childrens lives. It has no place there. When they are ready, you can talk to kids/teens about it and they will have a better grasp of what you are telling them.

Also, I don't understand how you can teach a child about the legality of marijuana when it is something they have never experienced. How can a 10 year old become an advocate for the legalization of marijuana?