Short rap I wrote

[spliffstar22]

comin up, a fucked up childhood,
i was like goddamn,
but now i'm on the block flippin
all the weight i can
don't get it twisted,
i ain't talkin bout a gram,
i'm talkin bout them bricks,
come on, hand me some grands

that's a couple lines off my mixtape, dropping soon, it's on the straight up menace beat

spliffstar22 Reviewed by spliffstar22 on 01-14-2007. Short rap I wrote Ok so i like to write things, wether it be songs, raps, poetry, whatever. Well i was bored a second ago and wrote this short little rap, took me about 10 minutes. Just tell me what you think and critique it or whatever. And please ppl, DONT post YOUR songs, or raps I get a sensation when I penetrate the teenage generation It's insane when, I open her fuckin' mouth and fuck her fuckin' brains in And I'm not changin, you better trust that Infact, I'll blast your wack ass if your talkin that Rating: 5

[Nochowderforyou]

You need some work on you're wiriting skills. MastaChronic said it, you need a huge vocab. to be write anything decent. Pick up a Thesorous(sp?) and find some more meaningful words to work with.

I like the opening line, but from there, it goes downhill.

The thing with rapping or hip-hopping, is the lyrics and words are your instrument. Using words in rap is like a guitar player playing a riff, or a bassist laying down a wicked bassline. Use the words as your weapon and instrument. Those words, I just see diarria of the mouth and hard talk. If you're going to rap hard, chose some better words.

My 2cents.

[Its a Plant]

...Stay in school and find a nice, secure 9-5...less disappointing that way...

That goes for most of the wannabes I see floating around here, too. ~

[spliffstar22]

Think what you want, im not no wannabe, i'm recording in a proper studio, being paid to record so say and think what you want to..... I'm signed to Headz Up Ent. which is in Toronto.......

[Its a Plant]

Lol, like I said...less disappointment...

As long as you not no nuthin', I'm cool g. ~

[suhl]

...Stay in school and find a nice, secure 9-5...less disappointing that way...

That goes for most of the wannabes I see floating around here, too. ~

hahahahahahaha its like you read my mind

[blazed620]

im not no wannabe...writing raps is just something i like to do in my free time. Is that wrong..?

I'll post a poem I wrote in another thread, and see what you think of it...i gues its something more "meaningful"....

[CanaDanKs Inc.]

You need some work on you're wiriting skills. MastaChronic said it, you need a huge vocab. to be write anything decent. Pick up a Thesorous(sp?) and find some more meaningful words to work with.

I like the opening line, but from there, it goes downhill.

The thing with rapping or hip-hopping, is the lyrics and words are your instrument. Using words in rap is like a guitar player playing a riff, or a bassist laying down a wicked bassline. Use the words as your weapon and instrument. Those words, I just see diarria of the mouth and hard talk. If you're going to rap hard, chose some better words.

My 2cents.

Actually no offense but as a beat maker, no rapper will ever replace my wicked basslines. :rasta:

[konqrr]

someone should start a freestyle/keystyle thread i think some stoners can write good stuff & include songs and/or poetry too not just rap

I hate keystylin cuz I cant add my flow to it like I could on a mic. Im not a serious MC or anything but its something I do when Im bored...just smoke a blunt and kick some rhymes.

[Mista Sippi]

someone should start a freestyle/keystyle thread i think some stoners can write good stuff & include songs and/or poetry too not just rap

http://boards.cannabis.com/showthread.php?t=80152

come drop some lines and keep the thread alive, even if it's amateur, I love checkin everybody's style.