Quote Originally Posted by AlwaysBlazed
today i was trying to tune my drums and all of the sudden, i snapped, i cant think straight, i actually thought about cutting myself and stopped myself after i found a sharp object, everything feels unreal, i feel like suicide is the only way but i would never kill myself.. i dont want to feel miserable anymore what do i do.. im not on any drugs right now.. it went from anger, to miserable... i feel anxious, i dont want to smoke weed to make it go away because this is more serious than ive ever gotten
I dont get how that could suddenly just happen..

I've tried killing myself before and dont do it, trust me it sucks. i was drunk as a mo fo and got a huge jaggered knife and sliced it across my wrist.. now i've got a huge scar underneath my sweat band that will never go away and that will always be there as a reminder of how stupid i was.. day after that my gf split up with me, i dropped outa college about week later, and now shes datin my old best mate.. but im not really depressed anymore.. i was just hiding it away which was a bad thing because it was just building up and waiting to escape until one day it did and the doctor said i was VERY lucky to not cut a vein, i cut so deep you could literilly see my main vein sticking out, i basicly slashed off all of my skin. The scars acctually gotten worse over past few weeks even tho i did it months ago. But yeah if you still feel like that seroiusly find sosmeone you can talk to. Not some stranger on the internet but someone you know, a friend maybe? trust me, friends can help the most.. family just makes it worse. My dad said he'd stop tellin me about the things my mum's been doin instead of coming to see me anymore after i got outa hospital and my mum said she'd try and see me once a week.. but nothin changed. I havnt seen my mum in months (oh yeah shes comin round tommorow acctually bein christmas n all) and my dads still a constant reminder that my mums never there for me. But fuck em.. you sometimes just gotta reallise that you need to stop thinking of how to make yourself a better person or how to get certain people back in your life.. might sound selfish but fuck anyone you love or care for and honestly just think about and for yourself for the time being, and defintly talk to someone like a friend instead of hiding away you're negative feelings

this is coming from someone who's been where you are