harris7, I think you are slowly realizing the discordian side of you. Why believe? Did you ever consider the option of believing not to believe?

"-to believe in a belief is ignorance, and to not believe in another single belief is ignorant. and within our so called "quest for knowledge we acquire beliefs. Absolute irony."
That was my train of thought, and then i discovered discordianism and the what not. "Hail Eris Goddess of chaos!" you will hear from many discordians, do not take it seriously..... because you will want to ask "do you belive in eris"
lol Good luck to you.