justinsane's suggestion is sound, and may be the solution you are looking for, but... a word to the wise: Like any drug, shrooms are a tool to help you along a spiritual path, they are not meant to be the path itself. They are a magnifier that often tend to intensify any emotions you may be feeling, so if you do take justinsane's advice, make sure you are in positive surroundings and with a trusted friend. I'd recommend doing more research on this if it's of interest to you, but this unfortunately isn't the place, so instead of imparting my own knowledge, I recommend seeking out the Shroomery. There's a ton of good information there.