very, very unlikely... well it depends on what you mean by step one, step one to recovery? no... 'five steps of death' ... she's on three, atleast i think that's Blaming.... (i think it goes denial <can't remember> blaming <depression acceptance) anyways, all she ever does is pitty herself for what happened, "oh woes me i pushed my son out of my house and i put him in the situation he was in when he died, blah blah blah" at first, you know i put up with it, and even tried to convince her otherwise because that's normal, atleast i thought, but no, she's holding on to that thought so tightly, she doesn't even see or care what she's doing to her other 3 sons... all she focuses on is what she did to him.. and before he died, i can tell you now she didn't give two shits about what she did to any of us... it kinda makes me wonder, am i going to have to die, to make her realize what she's done to me over the years... do i have to cease to exist for her to care about what she does to me? i mean i'm sure a mother cares about their child always... but that doesn't mean they won't be blind, and completely fuck the whole relationship up... she recently (last couple of years, dont' know exactly how old he is, i'm not over there much anymore, around him even less) had our other brother... now all she does is scream at him (he's atleast 2, no older then 3) and get pissed off at him when he wants attention... as far as their relationship is concerned he might as well be cinderella and she the evil step mother.... my other brother (the one still alive that's close to my age) even had to step in at one point when i was over there and demand she stop hitting him... and all he wanted was attention... she's really losing it, and destorying any relationship she has wtih anyone in the process... the sad thing is, i don't care if she was his mother or not, NO ONE, not even her, loved my brother as much as i did...

sometimes i wonder if she just uses his death to get attention... any time he's brought up, the conversation instantly turns to her, and how she feels at fault and what not.... she's always been a pathalogical liar and an attention whore, turning an every day situation, into some big blown way out of proportion thing... such as the time she was trying to hit/spank or something my brother (the one that's dead)... he wouldn't put up with it and pushed her to the ground... later she retold the story to me (trust me i believe my brother way over my mom, my brother told things how they were, he didn't spare anything, even if it made him look like a horrible person, he'd still tell the absolute truth about the situation) she told me a story of how he pushed her to the ground sat on her chest and started beating her in the face... she told me this story no later then a few days after it happened...

me and my brother got in a fight once, i ended up wtih a very swollen black eye... if he had hit HER, it would have shown clearly she was beaten... he was a big dude... atleast for his age, not so much in size or body mass, but just the muscle he had, made him 'big' she didn't have not one mark on her.. like i said, she's been known to blow thigns way out of proportion... now i can't help but wonder if she only uses his death to get attention... and if i ever find out she does... i'll disown her as quickly as my dad (my dad right after he died, went around to companies, some they worked for, some known for giving out charity, asking for donations for a benefit he was holding, which he wasn't, he was only using my brothers death to get donations to supply his crack habbit..)
slipknotpsycho Reviewed by slipknotpsycho on . so here i am.. bored and alone... wife's at work, no fancy dinner for me this year =/ i don't even have any bud either.. anyone else out there in the same boat as me? Rating: 5