Quote Originally Posted by birdgirl73
Well, until this recent event, I didn't have much to complain about, either, Crudemood, and just because you haven't had people close to you die doesn't mean you're not allowed to regard events in your own life as having been comparably bad. "Worst" is a subjective, comparative thing. Before losing my sister, about the worst I had to complain about was when I was real sick from a ruptured appendix, and I wasn't fully informed about how bad that really was, apparently, and so didn't even realize it till I got sprung from the ICU and eventually got well how bad it had been.

The more I think about it, Slipknot, the more I think there really is no good way to die. A slow death from disease is awful. And a sudden, violent death is awful, too, and, in my book, much worse. Ideally, I hope when my time comes, I'll be 118, in good health, in good mind, and will just pop off in my sleep from a stroke or something else fast and final. I know in time I'll get to feeling better about losing my sister. It's all just too fresh right now. But it helps that I've got a husband and son who need me--and parents and a younger sister, too, for that matter. Somehow it's easier to go on when others are depending on you. Don't you agree, Slipknot?
yes i compeltely agree, when everyone is depending soley on you, you have no choice but to go on, maybe it's just us two, but giving in is not an option, i don't want to say us or we too much, becuase everyone acts diffrently, but atleast i, have no option in the matter... i have another brother, not much younger than the one murdered, i must stay strong for him, i feel i have to lay down the guidelines, so he doesn't follow the same path as the first.... it's hard, but sometimes, people get indirectly designated as the 'shit taker' (that probably sounds worse than it is? i coudlnt' think of a better word(s), i meant the ones who take in all the pain, of the entire family, who act like nothing is wrong, who act liek they are strong, and have no choice but to hold up, cuz they know they are the strongest of the ones deeply effected..) and they have no real choice but to hold up, for fear the enitre family will fall apart...

it is alot easier when everyone's depnding on you to stay strong, and help everyone through it. say the words that everyone needs to hear, and want to hear, but that doesn't mean it doesn't take it's toll, not in the least. if you're in the same boat as me birdgirl, you know what i mean. i'm far from a position to say who in your family is they 'shit taker', but from your words i can only imagine it's you... i only hope you make yourself as strong as my exterior shell makes itsself, it's a hard task to undertake, and only the strongest will make it... i only hope that it's really a test of character, and not just some game that someone else is enjoying (i won't say names as i don't want to stir up some religious debate, atleast not here.)