You're an intelligent, sensitive, and perceptive young man, Orangeman, and I'm sorry you're so low and feeling lost right now. I hope your break will help you find the answers you need and help you feel more upbeat. You have SO much going for you, including an excellent mind and a family who loves you and friends here who admire and respect you. I'm proud to count myself among those friends, and I wish you all the best. Much love, sweetie. Talk to you soon!