I would like a strain that:

1) Is mobile and capable of understanding rudimentary commands, such that it could grow other strains (or its own) itself, unattended, fetch water, feed nutes, all that stuff.

2) Requires such little light and grows so quickly that one 23-watt CFL produces a pound, and does it in a week.

3) Gives you an up high that lasts for 6 hours, on one hit. Or a couchlock high that lasts for 6 hours, on two hits. Or knocks you unconscious for 12 hours, on three hits.

Guess that'd do it for me!