Hi everyone

This is kinda hard for me to write so please excuse any mistakes I make, Im dealing with some sensative issues.

3 days ago my dad passed away. He had a sudden heart attack and was only 48. I myself am 16. Now I know your asking what does this have to do with sexuality, but bere with me. When my dad died, and up till now I feel nothing. Absolutly nothing. Someone told me that im just in shock, and i believe thats it. Anyway these last few days Ive been thinking. Im not a very religiouse person but 1 thing i believe in is that everything happens for a reason. And I believe one of the reasons for my dad's death is so I could be reuinited with a long lost friend of mine. Me and her were friends from when we were born throught my early childhood years untill she moved away. I missed her soo much and havnt seen her since I was 8 when she moved an hour away. Now she came to my dads wake. When she walked throught the doors I knew who she was right away, and I know this may sound cheesy but it gave me a "love at first site" kind of feeling. Well through these last few days shes been there for me and my feelings keep on growing.But this isnt as simple as alittle crush. This leads me to problem number 1.

WHAT THE FUCK kind of a person am i to be focusing on my love life when my dad just died? I feel absolutly dreadfull for doing/thinking these things. But I cant stop. Its just sooo self centered and I know it but I cant get her outa my mind.

Im bringing this to you guys cause Im gonna need alot of advice this coming week. I have to go back to school, await her return this weekend and perhaps deal with the delayed sorrow of my father's passing.

These past days she was flirting with me, but I can not be sure if these are just acts of pity or if there is some relationship foundation here. Im just soo lost in all these emotions but for some reason my feelings for her stand above all. And if I do proceed to take my chances witht his girl, are there special ways I should handle it? Shes very special to me, but I dont know if I could ever look at her as my old friend anymore without yerning for something more.

thanks all for reading

P.S.
I just reread this and it sounded horrible in my mind. I just rly need to let this shit out. Sry if I wasted any1s time.
t3hl0st Reviewed by t3hl0st on . Confused. Hi everyone This is kinda hard for me to write so please excuse any mistakes I make, Im dealing with some sensative issues. 3 days ago my dad passed away. He had a sudden heart attack and was only 48. I myself am 16. Now I know your asking what does this have to do with sexuality, but bere with me. When my dad died, and up till now I feel nothing. Absolutly nothing. Someone told me that im just in shock, and i believe thats it. Anyway these last few days Ive been thinking. Im not a very Rating: 5