i was jus playin 'bout diggin up my grandma, so roll wit it.
this ones for real tho, no playin.
i met this bitch through a friends sister. she was fat and round and had it goin on, she was bi-polar and i guess goin through her manic stage. she kept tellin me she was just a tease, but the same day i met her, we went down to the river and fucked in the water with a bunch of people only like 30 yards away.
any way, she said she smoked weed, so i went to a friends house to see if he was cool with her comin over, i told him her name, what she looks like blah blah blah, he said he knew her so i went back and told her it was cool to smoke at my friends.
once we got there he said this wasnt the bitch he knew, but he was cool with it. she had stolen some beer from her parents, a shitty five cans of keystone light, she had two, i had two and my homie had one. i got a headache off the shit, but she looked pretty buzzed off the two she had, and she hangin off me and flirtin with my boi, so whatever.
i left the room so they could fuck and whatnot, after they were done (5 minutes) she comes out, goes to the bathroom to "clean herself out" i go in and find out, that my homie WAS a virgin and im just like, "cool, i just hooked you up witch your first pussy" yeah, cool.
she comes back in and tells him to get out and then we start fuckin, i was so glad i went to the HIV center and got a bunch of free condoms the day before. we fucked for about an hour, and she had the funniest expression on her face, like she was tryin to take a huge, but pleasurable dump, so that kept me from bustin for the longest time. after we're done we go out and find that another one of my homies showed up with a half O of some chronic and his bong, so were takin bong rips for a while and then she falls on the floor, crawls over to me, unzips my pants and starts blowin me. im like wtf? we just boned, havent you had enough dick yet? w/e she looks around and shes like uhhhh, wth am i doing?
after a few hours (it must have been around 6pm) she takes my other homie to the back room and tries fuckin him, but he didnt want nothin to do with her, so he comes back out, and she calls virgil (his name) back into the room and they stay in ther for a little while.
then we all go back in there and smoke some more weed out of kingpipe. she starts rippin a beer can apart w/e, and tears off a fairly large piece of metal, and starts cutting herself, out of nowhere, i was just like wtf? why you cuttin yourself? she stopped and said, i dont know it just feels good. but she stops and shes bleedin, i like the taste of blood so i start lickin it off her.
so i was like cool, me and summit (the homie who didnt want her neddin) go back out into the living room and start blazin some more, they stayed back listenin to the music or somethin, after a while i go back in and look at virgils arm, it had cuts on it, i didnt say nothin, but that pissed me off. he hadnt cut himself in over a year and now this bitch is doin that kinda shit to him?!
i stayed in there this time and she tries hangin off me and cuddlin or w/e but i was pissed on top of that, "take a look in the mirror" was on which puts me in a bad place anyways. she couldnt figure out what was wrong and i wasnt about to say, "you cut one of my best friends you bitch!"
so i left, it was around 9 and me and summit wanted her gone, her parents were gonna get worried and call the cops and report her as a runaway, show up here and get us all in some deep shit, plus she had cuts all up and down her arms making it an even worse situation, so we wanted her gone.
we talked to virgil about it, since it was his house, only he had the right to tell her to leave, he said okay, and when he told her it was time to go she started crying "but its dark, how am i going to get home?" blah blah blah blah, not our problem bitch, you decided to stay this late. he felt sorry for her and told her she could stay, but he understood the danger and told her at 6am she had to be gone.
a little while later virgils mom woke up and gave us some ibuprofen, i scratched am "s" on it and gave it to the bitch, told her it was a sleeping pill, she believed me and it had a placebo affect on her. me and summit stayed awake through the night smoking more weed, and waiting for the appointed hour, i woke them up at 5:30 and told her to get her shit together, cause 6 is almost here "waaah waaah waah, i dont wanna go! blah blah blah"
virgil let her stay, bullshit. well, around 2pm summit looked out the window, and wouldnt ya know it? a cop was rollin down to the end of the street stoppin at houses, askin people things. oh shit!, "bitch i hope you got your shit, cause your gettin the fuck outta here now! i dont give a fuck!" she had her shit together luckily and we put her in the backyard, told her there was an exit through the black berry bushes on the left side and we assumed she took off.
the cop showed up at our house not a moment to soon and started askin questions, "have you seen so-so, are you so-so, we heard that she was stayin here, blah blah blah" " no shes not here officer, yes im so-so, who told you that?" "can i look around in here?""i dont know, im not the owner of the house, hey virgil! can he come in here?" "yeah, sure"
so the pig comes in looks around, goes to the back room, where the hookah was, in plain sight, didnt notice it, looked under the beds, closets etc, didnt find anything, so he left.
then we go look out in the backyard and couldnt you guess, the dumb bitch was just standin in the middle of his backyard. so me and summit went out there and asked why the fuck she didnt go through the exit "the blackberries are too thick waah," the bushes were hardly thick, she might have gotten scratched a little, so what, she likes cutting herself , whats a few scratches?
we went back into the house, grabbed some hatchets, went back out there and told her if she didnt go, we were gonna bust her head, she went but she was crying or something, "waaha wahh" w/e before she was all the way through she turns and says "tell virgil i love him" i flipped "bitch! if you loved him why the fuck you cuttin him up? get the fuck out of here, you were never here, you never met virgil, you dont know who summit is, rememebr that! as soon as you leave, get on the creek, follow it to the river and follow the river to your house, stay off the streets!"
she left, i havent heard from her since, she left her bike there, which later that night i had to ghost ride off a cliff, she left some clothes which we had to burn.
later that week i went over to the friends house where i had met her and he told me that she was picked up by the cops, taken to her house and then went off to some mental institution in portland.
this happened, i think, sometime in the middle of july. man that was a fucked up situation she put us in. sorry for the long ass post, but thats a true story. and i still cant believe he never noticed virgils hookah.