Shit!!! My Only Chance!!! Help!!!

[Ol Schwaggy Bastard]

stick your dick in a cup of bleach...

Mix it with ammonia first.

Ol Schwaggy Bastard Reviewed by Ol Schwaggy Bastard on 10-17-2006. Shit!!! My Only Chance!!! Help!!! Ok so ive ALMOST scored a job here soon with a cleaning service in this town near my college... the onyl thing is...she said they have a drug test before they can hire me....I mean I smoked ....umm...yesterday...and I called tonight... she said she will contact me tomorrow... I mean if theres any fucking way I can get clean before this test pleaseeee let me know!!! = ( I really need this job Rating: 5

[partyguy420]

dude... i rember some one saying to put your dick in a cup of bleach... to pass a ua... and funny story... ithink i told them to put ammonia in it first... and then some one said that i had been studing to much about hitler and called me a nazi... so Ol Schwaggy Bastard quit studing about hitler so much you damn nazi...

[TheGreenFog]

Unfortunately, I would advise against every single one of those remedies except for the substituted urine. That is the ONLY way you will guarantee success for an important thing like this. Anything else, you will be risking it BIGTIME.

Just because one thing worked for one person one time, doesnt mean it will work for you. Factors include weight (fat%), length and frequency of smoking, metabolism, etc. Don't count on it. Just focus all your energy on finding a friend who can piss clean! That's a task in itself. Go get that job! Contribute to society, ya damn pot smoker, you! LOL.

stick your dick in a cup of bleach...

Oh, yea and don't forget to do this before you use the condom method. It's imperative.




Bahahahahaha...hilarious.


TGF

Edit: So, I guess I posted this a little too late. Oh well, so how'd your test go? Did you get the job??

[Ol Schwaggy Bastard]

dude... i rember some one saying to put your dick in a cup of bleach... to pass a ua... and funny story... ithink i told them to put ammonia in it first... and then some one said that i had been studing to much about hitler and called me a nazi... so Ol Schwaggy Bastard quit studing about hitler so much you damn nazi...

that's funny, hitler didn't even pop into my head. I was thinking more Child Called It.
Don't put your dick in anything but pussy...or ass if that's what you're into. If you wanna use bleach put that shit in a visine bottle and hide it in your taint.

[Nochowderforyou]

Companies piss test employees for a cleaning position? Damn! America blows.

[Acouwaila]

Yeah she is supposed to call me sometime today and im hoping she doesnt say something like "k just drop by for a drug test real fast"

but ive been drinking lots of waters n what not so hopefully ill pass...

i think ima try the condom thing

[MastaChronic]

eat 1500 mg of niacin dude make sure its not the unflushed kind, it might make your body feel like its on fire and turn you red, but you'll be clean

[Acouwaila]

im broke = ( hence why im gettin the job

[SiXFeEtDeEp]

that's funny, hitler didn't even pop into my head. I was thinking more Child Called It.
Don't put your dick in anything but pussy...or ass if that's what you're into. If you wanna use bleach put that shit in a visine bottle and hide it in your taint.

Good fucking book Ol. have you read the other 2? I meet David Pelz. (can't spell his last name right) at a motivational speak party during school. awsome guy.

First off im sure its not your ONLY chance for a job. second i heard of someone famining (not eating for a month just drinking water) or in your case a day. so what i would suggest is when this lady calls. tell here today an"t goin to work. make up some shit like you have to take your dad to the heart doctor or somthing. then go buy yourself 5-6 Gallons of water. Don't eat ANYTING until the test. Excurcise and Drink water as much as possable. and you should be fine. i smoke 5-6 joints a day for the past 10+ years. and just last year had to drop and passed doin this. i find Not eating,Lots of water,Lots of Excurcise is the key. you gotta flush ALL the nasty shit out of your system and if you eat that just helps keep the nasty shit in ya.

if they do a hair test. stay away from pot for at least a week that means your pot smokeing buddies too. and go buy the detox shampoo. i used that a like 4-5 years ago and passed. the key is to use Vinager instead of water. and to stay away from pot completly for at least 3-4 days.

[Ol Schwaggy Bastard]

Good fucking book Ol. have you read the other 2? I meet David Pelz. (can't spell his last name right) at a motivational speak party during school. awsome guy.

Yeah, lost boy and a man named dave. I didn't like A Man Named Dave, that shit was boring, but the first two were good.