The Illusion Of Communication

[Inferius]

Through body language, facial expression, tone, and the words used to describe something, we humans attempt to communicate our perception of reality amongst each other.

>>>>>>>>>>>>But we all die alone.
>>>>>>>>>>>>We never truly understand one another. >>>>>>>>>>>>We are always, forever, alone.

We pretend to "grasp" another human's perception through comparison to our own, or through chemicals designed to make us feel as if we've "bonded",
but we cannot truly connect.

Our entire lives, from start to finish, one big battle with happyness and a sense of satisfaction from life. If you've ever done psychedelics... They can make you aware of the true distance between living things. I can never truly know if the feeling that I am trying to convey to my friend is the same thing as he feels. Unless his mental "trip" and chemical balance throughout life has been almost identical to my own, our expirience cannot be replicated simply by communicating.
The sense of thinking something brilliant while high comes from a myriad of chemical interactions. When you wake up the next day and read "GREAT IDEA: FEED CHICKEN BACON" next to a picture of an egg hatching a peice of bacon, do you really feel such a sense of awe like you did beforehand? Now imagine if your friend who was with you at the time wasn't stoned when you came up with that idea. Did he feel the sense of awe? No.
But this goes on every single day. Stupidity and emotional haze override our sense of rationality, and lead us to beleive that when we communicate with people and they act like they've expirienced the same life-chemicals as you, you truly do understand what it feels like to "be" the other person. But you don't.

We are truly alone, in our own minds. Encapsulated within a fragile skull, viewing what we perceive as others just like us but in different physical positioning on the planet... Should I just give in? Is rationality, the verbal mind, truly the cause of my pain? Should I let go, let my emotions and chemicals re-trick me, push me towards an illusion that allows me to feel a sense of belonging?

I don't want to be human anymore. I'm sick of this feeling.
I hate this wandering fear, the constant barrage of apathy, instant gratification, despise of myself and others... I feel out of place as a human being. The sad part is, a therapist would most likely tell me even THIS feeling is a product of my chemical imbalances, the result of my place in society and my relationships. I can never gain complete control when I am Trapped, SUFFOCATED, WITHIN this physical plane.

And i'm sick of lying on this site. A fucking internet forum, i've sunk this low to feed off my primal desires for human interaction.
I know very well that people look down upon those younger that them, seeing them as less informed, immature, that their opinions can never truly be taken seriously due to their age. But I want it off my chest.
I'm 16, a virgin, live with my father, sort of dropped out due to depression last year, I wear glasses, I have a strong distaste for most teenagers, especially when they act like teenagers. I hate the way they force themselves into groups or titles or fads due to social placement, how they succumb so deeply into their primal needs. I have one friend. And the friendship is based on music appreciation and drug use. That's it. Even that relationship is dying. I find anger and dullness to be the biggest personality turnoffs on this site, while I feel a desire to be noticed and liked by Birdgirl, or ItsAPlant, or anyone who's shown intelligence and a sense of humor about life.


Does anyone here think they understand?
Any advice? Opinion? Shut the fuck up you whiny teenager, so many african children are starving right now and all you can do is complain about your life?

My social awareness tells me to feel self-centered, selfish, pathetic, but I can't remove myself from my true being like so many "tough" men pretend to do.
the beauty of this world only manages to distract me for so long... I need something permanent.

Inferius Reviewed by Inferius on 10-09-2006. The Illusion Of Communication Through body language, facial expression, tone, and the words used to describe something, we humans attempt to communicate our perception of reality amongst each other. >>>>>>>>>>>>But we all die alone. >>>>>>>>>>>>We never truly understand one another. >>>>>>>>>>>>We are always, forever, alone. We pretend to "grasp" another human's perception through comparison to our own, or through chemicals designed to make us feel as if we've "bonded", Rating: 5

[benagain]

If you're a teenager, then it's not your fault you're all fucked up feeling. You talk about checmicals, well son you have them gushing out of every pore. You can't expect to understant it, it never makes much sense at a young age. Give it another 6 or 7 years and it'll start to come together. You don't have a good view of the world, you've got too many hormones running around to get a good look.

[the joint meister]

me and my friends have a fuckin bond i now i wont die alone unless he dies first, but we do have a bond all the time even when whur not high

[benagain]

me and my friends have a fuckin bond i now i wont die alone unless he dies first, but we do have a bond all the time even when whur not high

How old are you and your buds? Just wondering...

[notunpretentious]

"I'm not who you think I am; I'm only what I think you think I am"

i heard that from my sociology teacher, and it makes a lot of sense. people are an interesting bunch.

[Wesley Pipes]

me and my friends have a fuckin bond i now i wont die alone unless he dies first, but we do have a bond all the time even when whur not high

everyone dies alone, no-one will walk down the "tunnel of light" with you, no-one can share your death, u may not be alone WHEN you die, but u will still die alone... i find it kinda ironic that the only certainty in life... is death.

And Inferius is right about one other thing, no 2 ppl are the same or will percieve the world in the same way, our brains grow and develop in different ways due to our own personal experiences, the choices we make and don't make... those are what define us, and what is known as "personality"... is just chemical reactions to situations and decisions...in short, everyones brain grows differently... for example.. taxi/cab drivers have bigger brains than the average human = FACT... because certain parts of the brain grow bigger (in their case the part that defines navigation)

and hey dude u aint as alone as u think, i'm 21 and i still dont understand the world and most ppl in it :thumbsup:

[crudemood]

no you and your friend will not see the exact same ideas you see but thats the beauty of it. you keep unveiling each other like upwrapping a gift. you'll eventually meet each other at the same end if you're both willing to work on it.
i love this part of communication, if you guys thought the exact same thing there would be nothint to communicate and then things would get boring youd just sit there staring at each other not knowing what to say.

for me i love talking to people and possibly tapping into their minds. its just so exciting.
saying that you'll die alone is depressing, it sounds like it coming from a depression somewhere deep in your mind. i hope it'll change for you soon, life just isnt as good as it should be if you're in the shit.

feel good soon friend.

[shoi]

i hate the starving children in africa argument... just cuase they have a bad life doesnt mean u have to be happy....

and inferius i understand wat u mean i have very similar feelings like that... i understnad but i dont no i can see the diferences but ive felt many similar emotions... im just a tad younger than u

[Wesley Pipes]

at the end of the day tho, ppl lie, its a fact of life.

[Its a Plant]

"You live
you love
you die
each time you slide away
still you try, and try, but you know
some things in life will never go your way"

- PGroove "It Starts Where It Ends"

I think you're at an age where you're going to be constantly changing, trying to find yourself. There's no way I'd even think I would be the person I am today way back in my freshman year of high school. But it's all about self-discovery and soul-searching.

I like how Crudemood summed up what it's like to be friends with someone else. Each of you, though obviously different in your own ways, each bring something to the table, and hopefully learn from each other as your bond grows. But if the bond is created on a lie or something unstable, I can see that 'friendship' crashing.

And Gizmo - - I never realized or thought you were lying on this site, and still don't. I knew you were around that age, that you dropped out, and that you despise the high school fads and trends. Unless you were lying about something else? I just don't see it.

I've always enjoyed reading what you have to say, for the longest time. Nearly every one of your posts I try and read. They all have voice and personality and very often a sense of humor similiar to my own. It just kind of shocks me that you're so down and out about life, love, and happiness.

My advice, if I can even offer any, would be to meet some new people, possibly outside the prison walls of high school. Get involved in community service, or a soup kitchen for the homeless. It sounds like you just need something to belong to, something to maybe bring you back around to the idea that humans may indeed 'die alone', but the connections you make with some people are ever-after and constant, forever. And good luck with the ladies - - just don't go out and screw anything that moves b/c you're better than that! Anyone that recognizes who you truely are, as I think I have for the most part, will be lucky to have you. They're out there. Now you just gotta bridge the gap and try and meet her halfway.

Good luck with your journey Gizmo, and remember - - do not eat chicken after midnight! ~