Getting over past loves...

[someuser]

As far as counseling's concerned, try and keep an open mind. Just because one counselor didn't work doesn't mean it's not without value, even someday perhaps for you. There are lots of different counselors and lots of different therapies, many very helpful. People need to want to do therapy in order for it to succeed, however, and many do not. Also, I think hypnosis is a very good tool for helping re-target unconscious patterns and thoughts, and it's very calming, too. Just keep these things in mind for the future when you might be ready for other tools.

I'll keep all that in mind birdgirl73... Especially the hypnosis

someuser Reviewed by someuser on 10-10-2006. Getting over past loves... Anyone here have any tips or tricks? I've been 'stuck' on this one girl I dated in HS... We dated from 97' to 2000 and I havent seen her since Jan. of 2000... But I think of her every day. It was one of those 'love at first sight' things and we had a very passionate 2.5yrs together. We kept in contact since the 15th of this September until I finally told her I couldnt keep this email thing going anymore... She told me she still was in love with me and thinks of me every day... *BUT* she Rating: 5

[Its a Plant]

This post is definitley something of deep interest to me, for several reasons.

First off, I will say that I do know, to some extent, what you're going through. My story is similar to yours, too. I had a girl back in high school. We met soph. year and all the way up to the day we graduated, we became best friends and fell in love. Then she went off to college, got some prickhead boyfriend, and I haven't seen her in a year. Now I'm not beating myself up too bad like you seem to be, but rather look back at the good times we had, every now and then, and smile. I will admit I find myself daydreaming about her randomly, but it's not really that large a presence like your thoughts are. I would call it a subtle little reminder in the back of my head, making random appearances to either crack a smile or maybe cause me to cringe at 'what could have been'.

I would think that you need to seek some professional help because you have become deeply attatched to something that will never be. Instead of moving on, you're wallowing in your pain, only making things worse. From what it sounds like, it's also preventing you from moving on in nearly every aspect of your life, which is not healthy. Not to sound cruel, but it's like you're constantly feeling sorry for yourself versus picking yourself up and living life. Life might feel like it's passing you by, no? If you personally cannot work out these demons, don't feel shame, but instead seek the help of a professional, because otherwise it won't get better and eventually lead you down a path you probably hadn't intended on taking.

Please don't take any of my comments as negative; I'm just voicing what I have noticed after reading this for some time. But I can definitely relate to you as far as the pain goes. It's hard sometimes to think of life without her, or that you'll end up with someone else instead of her, if anyone at all. You just have to be a good friend, wish her the best, and get your life straightened out.

If you two are meant to be, your souls might reconnect years later. In the meantime, holding onto something that isn't there is no way to live life. It's no life at all, really.

It's like watching your favorite movie over and over again. Sure it's a GREAT movie, but after the credits roll, you get up off the couch, and life goes on. It doesn't make much sense to continue to watch that same movie while the world around you moves along, am I right? Memories are much like movies in that sense; they are great for making you smile or reminisce of old times, but to be stuck watching the same thing over and over is just painful, and no one should have to go through that.

Hopefully you can take something away from this, but if not, I wish you the best in all that your life has to offer. ~

"Remember the past, but look to the future"

[thcbongman]

Zip, zero, natta. They say no one is perfect but she was perfect for me. I loved everything about her. The entire 2.5yrs with her I never once was tempted nor desired any other woman on any level... Even now, I cant find any girls that can come close to her.

She has the most beautiful thick long brown hair and deep brown eyes... Think Natalie Portman from Star Wars II when they were on Naboo with the waterfalls in the background... She had this heart of gold, loved kids, loved animals, she was just so... Pure. She honestly was angel like. And the nights together were just so intense... I never felt so close to someone. It was like heaven on earth. Her family was like a 2nd family to me and everyone treated me like family in return. I was an 'honorary' uncle to her niece... I mean I could go on and on but I can safely say, even after all these years, I cant find anything wrong with her... Even after all the pain I cant resent her at all. All I can do is feel empty inside; Lost. It's a feeling that is with me 24/7... I cant sleep, I cant keep a steady job down, I have no desire to hang out with friends or do the things I use to love... All I wanted to do for the last 6yrs was to die... I just have been too chicken shit.

Be glad you are a chicken shit. Dying is pointless and causes so much pain to those close to you. There is something better if you look and open your eyes. Life is continuous change. Even tho i'm 5 years younger, I been through birth, suffering and sickness, and lived quite an accelerated life. Time is short. Find your way to be full, exploring Wiccan can only bring positive things for you to find peace.

[rachel25]

Have you ever thought about going travelling? it can work wonders believe me, it changed my outlook on life completely. I hope things get better for you, you sound really nice and it would be a tragedy for women everywhere if you just gave up. Chin up hun x x

[partyguy420]

right now i feal like crying over a girl that cheated on me atleast 3 known times actualy invloing sex... and i dont have any sudgetions for you right now...