About a year ago I was unemployed and the one day I was actually looking for a job in the paper and not smoking weed the door bell rings. I leave my bedroom and have a look through the upstairs window and see some white guy about 5'8'' in joggers and a baseball cap. Theres was just something odd lookin about the guy and the fact I was in my dressing gown I decided not to answer the door. I went down stairs got a drink and noticed my back door was unlocked. I locked it and took the key and drink back upto my room, when i got there i chucked the key on the side and continued looking through the local paper looking for a job. I turned the first page and I hear this banging downstairs from sounds like the kitchen. Now im always hearing shit in my house, most of the time it's my cat pissing about with something she's found on the floor. But this time it was very different!

I always have a tool nearby as my old man ain't about so im the man of the house. This time i had my expandable baton to hand, like UK police have.About two and a half foot long of black metal with a comfortable rubber grip. So I flick it out and go and take a look see in my dressing gown. I get into the kitchen and the same guy that rang the door and another guy have a of pair long red bolt cutters and are cutting like mad at my back door. I have one those double glazed PVC doors. When I first saw them, I just froze and took the scene in for a moment. There's two guys breaking into my house, my fuckin house! I raise my baton above my head and shout as loud as I can '' GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY HOUSE ''. The taller of the two who's doing the cutting just looks at me and cuts even harder. I remember the look in his eye, like a savage hungry dog, like a man looking for his next fix. I've seen that look many a time before, I know that look.
Now I'm a big fella, 6' 2'' , shaved head, around 12 stones and fuck me I can shout, i was waiving my baton above my head like a mad man, but the guy didnt even fuckin flinch he just cut harder. Now this pissed me off, not only are you breaking into my home, where my family live, where my family have died, but you're not taking the fucking hint and this made me the even more angrier! I reached into my dressing gown pocket for the key so I can unlock the door and well beat the living shit outta these arsehole scum that are breaking into my home, but alas I'd left it upstairs. I ran upstairs to get the key and had a hundred thoughts racing through my head.

I run upto my room and grab the key and my phone I think about the situation for what seemed like ages, but really it only took a split second. Let me sum it up, Theres two guys breaking into your home, the one who rang the doorbell who you know you can quite comfortably handle, but the other is much taller and has a look that put the chills in you and obviously is cluckin for his next fix or isnt in the slightest intimidated by me. Maybe both. I think I need to call someone incase shit goes down and I end up in a pool of blood and no one knows what the hells happened to me. I think about calling my older bro who's the man you need in a shitty situation, but he lives too far away. I think of my lil bro who is just as good in a crisis, but hes at work, what about my boys? All at work, and then the last people i think of is the police. I dial 999 as fast as i can, get through to the lady and say: 'Police service', get through,'My names Chris Farmer, my address is 420 I aint telling ya (gave real addy to police ofcourse) my house is currently being burgled by two guys im going back down to stop them, come as soon as you can' and put throw the phone down.
I head back downstairs baton in hand, full of adrenaline, awaiting a fight to protect my home, knowing I may go down in the struggle. But all is quiet, not a fucking sound. I get to the bottom of the stairs and run into the kitchen and the back door is now wide open but no one is to be seen. I go back upstairs and get the phone, to my amazement the police are still on the line. I tell them not to worry they've gone when they ask me if ive checked the rest of the house. This big, black cloud of dread consumes me. What if they're still here, could I have been that stupid and not checked the rest of the house? Why had I assumed they'd just gone? Are they still here, somewhere?
I stayed on the phone to the police while going around the house checkin in cupboards and behind doors. It was like something outta a film! Me kickin doors in, on the phone the police, clearing rooms, looking for the scum that had broken in my home.
I checked the whole house but found no one and nothing missing, not as much as a spoon out of place except for the busted back door where they broken in. As I checked the last room the police turned up, little too late, can they get anything right?
They took all the details, send for forensics to take prints, took me to the cop shop, looked at photos to see if I could recognise anyone. None of it anyuse, but 'they're keeping it on record'. For the nest few days I had a nine inch hunting knive in sheath around my right ankle, throwing darts to my right, and now a hickory pic axe handle. Thought I should up the game if they come back. They never have, but it cost my old dear £50.00 excess on house insurance to fix the back door and put extra locks on, £300.00 on a pukka alarm system and the price of not feeling safe in your own home. Know I have tools lieing about everywhere now, be it my hickory stick or a magazine (rolled up makes a quick, deadly tool) just incase. So if you two pussy ass bitches are reading, come back and try again, I fucking dare ya!

Peace

Buddy
buddymyfriend Reviewed by buddymyfriend on . Ever been burgled? About a year ago I was unemployed and the one day I was actually looking for a job in the paper and not smoking weed the door bell rings. I leave my bedroom and have a look through the upstairs window and see some white guy about 5'8'' in joggers and a baseball cap. Theres was just something odd lookin about the guy and the fact I was in my dressing gown I decided not to answer the door. I went down stairs got a drink and noticed my back door was unlocked. I locked it and took the key and drink Rating: 5