I didn't read the thread that throughly but do you grill or toast your crumpets? I find that toasting twice in the toaster gets it a nice brown, I like them under done a bit so they have a crunchy rim but the inside is nice and squishy, the butter soaks into it but is enough not to be mushy. I only really ever have beans on them but you could probaly put all sorts. I don't like fry ups that much, depends on whos making. Personally, for lunch, it would be a toasted ham or cheese, with pickle and mayonaise and lettuce sandwich. The lettuce would be added after toasting, alot of people fucking hate pickle. Can't just be any pickle, has to be Branston.