Quote Originally Posted by jamstigator
I had a bodyguard in Turkey (long story), a tough, stocky Latino guy that my first sergeant assigned to protect me from a Turkish family that was trying to kill me. Anyway, me and him (his name was Tony) got super drunk on another friend's balcony one night. Tony was feeling all tough, so he told me to hit him, anywhere, he could take it. So I elbowed him in the throat and he went down coughing and choking. Lucky I didn't permanently damage him or outright kill him.

He got pissed (why, I'm not sure, guess he really meant 'hit me anywhere but my throat') and proceeded to beat my head against the railing of the balcony. I was pretty fucked up. The next morning my first sergeant came by my place to see if I had survived the night (he was a nice guy and lived near me, so he always checked on my status each morning). I answered the door, all in a daze. I didn't remember much of anything that happened the night before, but my head hurt BAD, and I could feel it was all swollen on one side.

My sarge saw my face and he was alarmed. He asked if the Turks got to me, and I said naw, I just fell down. But actually, I didn't know what had happened to my face. Later that day I met up with Tony, and he saw my face and he was like, dude, I'm so sorry I beat your head against that railing last night! I replied, "Ya know, if I remembered you beating my face in, I'd be pretty pissed off! But...I don't remember!"
Hahahahahaha. I love your stories. "I guess he really meant 'hit me anwhere but my throat'" that line had me cracking up... And then "dude, i'm so sorry I beat your hard against the railing last night had me almost choking I was laughing so hard. More more!!:dance: