Oh, my goodness, Oreo. You're sweet. You're cute. You're my next husband (assuming my current first one ever falls off the face of the earth). You're named after my favorite cookie. AND you like milk chocolate better than anything???? I think we're soulmates.

Sadly, I'm old enough to be your mother. Actually, at 44, I'm probably older than your mother. Still, milf and cookies do work well together. . . .