Had one of them talks about it with mother/grandfather

[orangeman]

...your moms a bitch...

Even though he's mad at his mom..I dont think he appreciates you callin his mom a bitch lol.

orangeman Reviewed by orangeman on 07-26-2006. Had one of them talks about it with mother/grandfather Didnt go well at all! It wasnt much a of a talk with my mother, Im getting very sick of her treating me the same now as she did when I was 12 (Im nearly 17, and a mature 17 year old if I do say so myself) It started by her coming in to my room while I was asleep and telling me that she's not giving me money to go across the country for training because I smoke dope so there's no point in training. I got picked in the top 35 players in my quarter of the country to play rugby for that Rating: 5

[Markay]

Indeed, unreasonable and closed minded are better words.

But yeah, this pretty much sucks. They cant see that Im not gonna do it everyday, I go out and party (toke while others drink!) about once a month. Ill toke then, and maybe 3-4 times a month other times. So once a week! That wouldnt even effect my mental state, I know how much I have to smoke to make myself go bad (ive done it before!)

But, funny thing is, my mam was super pissed last night, so what did she do? Have a can of heineken!
I was sooo tempted to explain to her that was escapism using a much stronger drug than cannabis and I would never smoke cannabis while having problems because that just creates another problem, but she probably would have shot me!

Oh well, again, Im looking forward to being a good father in a good few years. I hope my kids dont drink but toke with me, and we can talk about life. I wish I had that

[BlazinGenius]

But yeah, my mother's gone on a mental one, and she's stormed off saying that I can either stop taking cannabis or 'do a thomas on it'. Thomas is my brother who left because of her bullshit! It wasnt cannabis related, she just doesnt know how to parent problems. She just shouts.

that's all I would have needed to hear...pack your shit up, and move on. Ignorant people don't deserve the satisfaction of raising children.

[crudemood]

I know the type. I wouldn't bother wasting energy trying to communicate factual information with her. I suggest not acknowledging anything she has to say until she is willing to make conversation a two-way street. Some people have problems with conversational skills and just need to be trained.

My mother was always cool, but my father was exactly how you describe your mom. It used to be arguements and such, basicaly him not listening and trying to overbear my point of view with loudness and aggression. I eventualy told him that conversation must be a two way street or it is a waste of energy even opening our mouths. Eventualy he learned how to have a proper conversation with me, but it took time.

I thought my dad was the only one that way. He never listens, its always him telling me what to do and not listening to a word I say. I'm 19 now and he still does that, its kind of irritating I cant have a proper conversation with him. So, I dont bother talking to him at all. He was the kind of dad who said outloud once, "Girls should do all the washing and cleaning." He's old and you know someone is old when they can't change their ways because they're too stubborn to accept any other ideas.

It is easier to pull that "I'm the mother" shit, but it runs dry as you age. You can't win here, she doesn't seem to be open to discussion at all because she doesn't want to have to think of a good reason for her rule.

Whenever I try to state my point of view on things he'll say such condescending things like, "I'm older and have more experience than you do." Saying that anything I say has no value and that I should listen to him no matter what.
I say simply state my opinion and he'll get all angry because he thinks I'm disrespecting him, or he'll go on trying to push his point of views on me until I agree and say shut up.

So, from my experience, I say dont bother unless they're willing to make a change for you and have trust that you know what you're doing and yes you're going to make mistakes along the way while you're at it. Its only normal.

Good luck.