i was at this after party for a friend's wedding reception in my hometown at this dude whom i barely knew, but we knew of each other just chilling with like 5 people before people started showing up. this dude decided to roll a J. we smoked it and right when it was done, i was talking with one of my friends and our other friend that's straightedge goes "i'm gonna go put my shoes on in case shit goes down" and i was like "yeah good idea" and as he walked to the door to get his shoes, i looked past him through the window and a K9 car was following right behind his head outside as there were like 20 people running into this house.

my friend i was talking to just says "cops!" as i'm trying to get my shoes on. my straightedge friend waits for me and he's like "you comin?" and i said "yeah lets roll" and i remember just looking at the back of his iron maiden shirt staring at the demon thing from number of the beast as we bolted out the back door into the bushes. he then kicked down a fence in the back yard and trampled it down and i followed.

as we were running through the yard, i kept getting hung up and little shit, and my friend was gone. i got up and ran two and a half blocks and then cut up a main road. i had a theory that the cops wouldn't stop me because i am a pretty clean cut looking kid. plus, i was wearing a nice striped blazer and an abercrombie button up, looking like a million bucks. as i was walking up the hill, i hear one officer running and i froze and thought "chill or run, chill or run" and decided to just chill. he shined his flashlight on me and i pretended to shield my eyes and wonder what he was doing. after like 15 seconds of keeping the light right on me, he took it off me and continued his search. my plan somehow worked.

i walked another block and decided to get off the main road because almost getting caught by that cop was so intense, i didn't want it to happen again. i wanted to just relax and walk to a friend's house.

as i get two blocks down, i see the county sherrif's car fly past about a block and a half down with his spot light on. then i just see the red and white lights reflecting on the houses and bushes. he had slammed on the breaks and threw it in reverse and he was coming for me. again, i decided to just chill. got off the street, walked on the grass, and pretended to shield my eyes. again, somehow it worked.

i was so ready to just explode with exhiliration after bluffing the cops TWICE, until another regular PD car spotlights me from behind. i just turned around, shieled my eyes, and he passed too.

i successfully managed to bluff the cops three tiee times. i eventually met up with my straightedge friend at our friends house.

i could go on now about how i then went back to get my van because they were going to have it towed and i didn't want my dad to pay for it and i was broke, so i decided to man up to the cops and got fined $700 for blowing a .001 2 months before turning 21 and running from the cops, but we'll save that for another day.

hope you enjoyed my stoned recollection of one of the best but most costly nights ever in my podunk hometown.

it also shows that cops are usually looking for certain "kinds" of people and how you dress matters to them, whether it should or not.