My dad died

[Ze w33d Farm3r]

damn after comming back on here after 4 months of leave and to find this? Haze i feel for you man, I know and i'm sure many other people here knows what it feels like to loose someone very close to you whom you loved ever so much.

I smoke this bowl to you and your dad's honour

God Bless your souls

[AmericanTerrorist]

Where was your god when my life was going down the drain
Late at night didn't you hear me calling out his name
Or was it meant for me to be a black sheep when all I wanted to be was happy
Now how hard could that be
For mama's pride and joy


Its times like these that show you who you really are and what you are made of. Learn from them..

Keep steady strong haze

[tootsie roll]

It is a shame, isn't it, Tootsie. Thanks for explaining a bit more about shiva. I would have tried to grab the Jewish Book of Why and read more about it, but I can't find my glasses!

My heart goes out to these boys, too. I can't imagine losing my dad now, much less at such tender ages as Haze and Jay.

I can lend you my reading glasses. Finally broke down and just bought a 3 pak. Now I can always find at least one pair. oy.

Their lives have already changed and the few months (not to mention the next few years) are now literally going to be "dehaze" I say that because, as a member of that club, that is what I experienced as did my brother.
All I can say is everything changes. It just does. And sometimes, it's hard, if not impossible to "march forward".

It's going to take time....lot's of time to start to adjust.

Oy, my heart does break for them.

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[da haze meister]

damn... lots of replies
thanks everyone...
yes, we are sitting shiva, and i am wearing a black ribbon
and aviator sunglasses
this death was the worst thing that ever happened in my life but at least ill grow to be a stronger, kinder man from it
plus i am getting close to people i had some problems with
like my sister cassie... im gonna drive out to chicago after i get my license and see her
and my friend hillary... we are so close now... i was over her house for like 4 hours today just talking and watching her fashion show... and she lived her whole life in family turmoil and without a father... and it was comforting to both of us to talk...
plus, me and my mother are going to discuss the whole weed thing after shiva is over... and we are gonna golf... and buy some more guns... and all of that. she was the most hurt in this. losing the love of your life is never fun. no teenager should ever have to bury their father.
thanks for the kind words everyone

[Skink]

I guess wut is worse than loosing yur Dad to death is losing him cause he just left and did not care about his offspring... My ex's Mom died and her Dad disowned the family years before... My ex's Stepdad was a creep and that was all she had after her Mom died... She did things to herself that ultimately was a cry for her only parent to care... Also gotta add that she wus molested and had very little self respect,that is the underlyng cause of our breakup...

You guys had a Dad who wus there,memories live on,be thankful there are good ones!!!

May your Dad rest in peace,and may you and yur family find peace...

[LittLeWinG]

You and your family will find peace of mind soon haze, it just needs time

[braddog10]

A prayer from a previous post yesterday:

Lord Jesus I thank you for these folks here. Be with those here, who have and are facing the death of ~ loved ones ~ . Holy Spirit, I ask that you would fill these homes involved. God...and for those suffering a hell here, that none of us know about. Jesus .....calm the storm. Send them friends of God. Thank you for forgiveness, mercy, and grace. I know also ..you are pleased to be here. ...da haze meisterer, and birdgirl.....God I can't imagine.

[Lulu]

just to have a few minutes to talk to him... give a final goodbye... and just carry on a conversation. i would tell him how much i loved him and appreciated him... how great of a father he was... how much he did for my mom and my brother and my estranged sister and me and just let him know that he will always be in my heart and mind... i just hope he is doin alright in heaven... we are burying him with a blues CD and a classical CD an e.e. cummings book... his reading glasses... pictures of our beloved puppies... a CD player and headphones... his flight cap, flight suit, and basketball gear under it... he loved basketball and had a hell of a jumpshot... a stopwatch for the 4.18 mile he used to run at william tennet in philly... and i think thats it. he is recieving a full military burial with an honor guard flags taps and such.

Haze x

...you sound like you have a lot of love in your family. I'm so sad for
your huge loss but I know you'll find the strength to get through this.
There's nothing anyone can say to make it better, you just have to feel
the pain...there's no escaping it. But it won't always be this way.

My thoughts are with you and all belonging to you.

Much love x

Lulu

[smokey]

sorry to hear about your loss haze and by what u said sounds like he got the sending off he deserved just hang in there n remember the good times

peace
smokey

[da haze meister]

man thanks alot guys for the replies
i walked in after getting back from a friends house
and the vice principal was in my house lol
scared the shit outta me
he was in my room like whats that smell lol
but he was such a cool dude...
my dad loved him man
i miss dad but im getting better
listening to jack johnson