I hate flying. I have to go to Australia. That's a 25 hour flight, not counting lay-overs. I have two goals for this flight: a) to safely arrive in Australia with a bag of weed and b) to bring baked goods on the plane so I can stay high for 25 hours and beat boredom.

The best plan I have for bringing weed to Australia is to vacuum seal an 8th (ideally a zip+) or so in several bags (of which only the inside of the innermost bag will be exposed to weed) and tape that to my nuts and wear some tight briefs. Problem: if I get passed regular security and encounter a dog, that dog will attack my balls.

As far as the baked goods go, I could make cookies or brownies or whatever and just stow this in my carry-on bag. Security may be mildly suspicious leading them to smell the treat, which will immediately give me away. Additionally, if a dog smells my baked goods, it will probably go nuts. Enter the jalapeno poppers. I've heard peppers mess up a dog's sense of smell, so should I just bake jalapeno poppers filled with weed-butter/oil? If I just made cookies, I could stuff them in some chips-ahoy boxes making them look somewhat innocuous. Alternatively, I could just put hash oil into gel-caps.

The bottom line is: how common are dogs for international flights? If there are no dogs, I should be fine. But if there are dogs, what can and can't they smell? Can they identify weed cookies? If a dog barks at me, will I be searched regardless? And punishment-wise, if I get caught with weed brownies, do they do some chemical analysis on that stuff and punish me according to how much weed was found in the cookies or do they just take it and let me go? Could I get arrested for more than a day if I get busted with an 8th of weed and/or a batch of brownies with a zip baked in? I really need to land in Australia at the right time...

This is dumb idea, but I want to see if anyone's tried anything like this successfully... I know it's not hard to bring weed/weed-cookies on domestic flights because there are no dogs, but international flights? Anyhow, thanks for the advice!
mattdestruction Reviewed by mattdestruction on . Weeds on a plane... to australia I hate flying. I have to go to Australia. That's a 25 hour flight, not counting lay-overs. I have two goals for this flight: a) to safely arrive in Australia with a bag of weed and b) to bring baked goods on the plane so I can stay high for 25 hours and beat boredom. The best plan I have for bringing weed to Australia is to vacuum seal an 8th (ideally a zip+) or so in several bags (of which only the inside of the innermost bag will be exposed to weed) and tape that to my nuts and wear Rating: 5