Quote Originally Posted by Gothen
So, I guess this is another vent thread. Sorry I'm wasting up space, but I need to get it out and its 2:30 am and I'm all alone and I really can't handle it. Been with this girl for 9 months now and last night we get into an argument and I say some things that I don't mean because she was going out with her friends on the anniversary of my uncle's suicide. I told her it'd mean a lot to me if she stayed home, but she left anyway, so I yelled at her and said that I hated her and it pissed me off so fucking much she was leaving me on this night.

So, anyway, she calls me today and we talk for...god...hours..5, nearly six and it turns out last night she meant this guy and today she just broke up with me and said that it's just too stressful on her. How...how its so hard because her parents don't approve of her being with me and do everything in the world to stop her so when we go out they always make her get home by like...9 and on weekdays we'll be lucky if we get till 10:30. She can't even come see me unless her narc cousin comes with her, so she said she couldn't do it. She says she still is so much in love with me, that she always will be that I'll always be with her but that we just need time because its so hard right now. I gave everything to this girl. It'd been so long since I'd opened up to anyone and she broke my heart again. I know it was only 9 months, but I literally spent some of the best nights in my life.

I know there are other girls out there, but it's just so hard for me to accept she's not mine anymore. She said she still wants to be close friends, but I don't know...it's so hard for me to have to stay with her and be there for her, but not to be with her. I was crying for about 2 or 3 hours, I guess because I really didn't need this on top of getting kicked out by my mom, and coming to the realization that I won't be able to go to college for a while because I'll have to work my ass off just to make it in some shitty one bedroom apartment. Man, she picked a classic time to lay this on me.

Last time I got hurt, I said I'd never do it again, that I'd never put myself through it. But, I slowly found myself falling for this girl. Not some superficial love, but something that I thought was concrete and true. Something that was going to last. But, I guess I'm just naive, right? ::breathes deep::

Love is more destructive than any other thing I know. More wars have been waged and lives lost in the name of "love" or the jealousy sometimes felt from unfaithful partners than any other thing, except for maybe God.

Time to pick yourself up, Malik. Time to fill in the gaps and move on. Your heart's only an organ. Your soul is without bounds.

WELLLLLLLLLLLLL, my ol' gal left me and i' so glad she did
My ol girl left me and i'm glad she took the kid
Now i have less mouths to feed and
more room to sleep in my bed:dance:

dai*ma:stoned: