Quote Originally Posted by graph
Wow, it's 12:30 here in America. Damn Greenwich.

First thing you're gonna wanna do is find another fat funny guy to take your place. That way, your family will be sad, but not too sad. (don't take offense, I'm one too. In fact, I'll do it if the pay's good)

Before you die, open jars for people. Nobody likes opening jars, and at least that way you'll be remembered. Instead of "goodbye tom", it'll be "goodbye tom, the jar-opener"

Next, go ahead and wear a clown suit on the day you plan to do yourself in. That way people will won't be too depressed at your death. I mean, come on, what's funnier than a dead clown?

If you're suicide note's long, make a cliffnote's version. Nobody reads.
Speaking of jars...

If you off yourself, leave a little essence of Tom behind! Seal your farts in the jars, so you'll be remembered when the family opens them.
JunkYard Reviewed by JunkYard on . Do I pray? Do I go to the doctors? Do I tell my shrink all of this? Since I was 15 Ive been seeing a shrink. Done a few overdoses, most just to get rid of the pain but with one I really hoped it would kill me. Took a shitload of tablets (didnt bother counting them, Im not that pathetic) one night, went to sleep and woke up in the morning tripping balls because of all the chemicals that were in my body. It got worse a couple of years ago (when I was 16) at Easter. I talked to my mum about religion for two hours, cooked a curry, ate it then went up to my room. Rating: 5