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06-01-2006, 06:26 AM #18OPSenior Member
Do I pray? Do I go to the doctors? Do I tell my shrink all of this?
Originally Posted by Billionfold
I think Im going to cut down on the herb and stop the booze. I drink way too much right now. Halfway to becoming a wino - in the mornings I dont just have a glass of orange juice, I have a glass of vodka and orange.
No Im not joking about this. Ive only ever told two people this - Ben and Emily.
Likemclever, I really dont know what triggered this off. All I cant remember is that I just started cutting myself one day. Actually, thinking about it, I can remember some details. I was going through a tough relationship at the time, and she was constantly going in and out of the nuthouse, stopping her meds, taking overdoses and threatening to kill herself. I think I started cutting as a coping mechanism for all of that, but I dont know when I started to feel depressed or suicidal. It just sort of... happened.
I used to go for a run when I felt depressed, but lately my motivation levels have reached zero. Plus, I wouldnt go out round this area past 10pm without some form of protection (not a condom...)
Beachguy, please, carry on with the comments. And everyone else. I take nothing seriously lol.
Jeez, I really dont want to be remembered as an Emo. Even though I have none of the emo traits. Im not skinny, I dont wear horrid thick rimmed glasses, and I listen to decent music. Plus I have short hair and want to tye dye my clothes so I look like an LSD trip when I walk down the street.
Breukelen advocaat (is that French?) Im going to try that diet thing.
And as for getting a hobby... there really isnt anything that interests me in the slightest. I enjoy shooting because Im using a skill thats taken me years to build up, and each time I go down the field I KNOW that 99% of the time I can hit what Im aiming at. It just feels rewarding using a skill thats taken years to build up.
Edit: Ive been like this for a while, and I smoke between 3 and 7 grams a month. Surely thats not classed as 'heavy use'? Although it has been a lot higher lately - coping mechanism - like an ounce a month.
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