One LAST time attempt here:

You have a neighboy...dog is shitting in your backyard and you notice the neighboy himself in your kitchen stealing food from your fridge. You mention it to the neighbor and he laughs and does it again, and again.

My thinking is that I fence my backyard from having dog shit all over and put better locks on my doors and windows to keep the neighbor out. I suppose I could just shoot the both of em' but I'm a peaceful man!

Gumby wants me to believe that he would use fence money and lock money to fertilize his neighbors yard so it will be more appealing for the dog to shit in and also load the neighbors fridge so he don't steal any more food.