Post a joke here when u are high

[gin rummy]

What do you call a dog with no legs?..... It doesn't matter, he wont come to you.
How do you get a with pregnant?.... You screw her.
I've got a million of them

gin rummy Reviewed by gin rummy on 04-30-2006. Post a joke here when u are high Post a joke here when u are high. Rating: 5

[dog420]

Whens the only time you wink at an Afgan?

When you shoot them!

[beachguy in thongs]

Shit. I live at sea-level. If I travel to the Appalachians, I'll stop by and share a joke.

[cannabis campbell]

A woman walks into a pharmacy and tentatively approaches the pharmacist. The pharmacist, seeing her hesitancy, asks if there is anything that he can do for her. She asks him in a quiet voice, "Do you carry extra large condoms?" He points to where they are and asks if she wants to purchase a box. She says, "No, but do you mind if I wait here until someone does?"

---------------------------------------------------------------

The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex. Worried the girl might become pregnant, and adversely impact the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.

The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful, and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and, until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.

Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms. The girl started to laugh and reached over to hug her mother saying, "Oh Mum! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating Susan!"

--------------------------------------------------------------

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars?

"Are you nuts? !!" she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does.

"Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again.

"Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?" So the guy runs around the next block and faces her again. "Would you let me bite your breasts
just once for $10,000 dollars?"

She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmm, $10,000 dollars, eh? Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there."

So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them.

The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, "Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?"

"Nah", he replies. "Costs too much..............."

(Lmao i love this one)

[LIP]

That last one is GREAT Campbell, i love it!

[Oneironaut]

How many dead babies can a clown rape in one hour?
















































































I don't know, you sick fuck! Why would you ask a question like that? Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with you?! I think I'm going to throw up.

[paperlunatic]

ok..................... you asked for it... im going to tell you a joke high.... k...cmmmmmm,cc,c,mmmmmmmmm pee pee pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooooooobbbbbbbbburrrrbbbb burrbbb,. meow. ...and then he says, "thats no cow, thats my wifE!" haaaah hahaahah hoooo,,, ohohhowewe

[Oneironaut]

Why do they call it "PMS"?

Because "mad cow disease" was already taken.

[GhostFace2K]

A guy sticks his head in a barbershop and asks, "How long before i can get a haircut?"
The barber replies, "About two hours," and the guy leaves.
A week later the guy pops in and asks the same question.
"Two hours," replies the barber. Again the guy leaves.
The barber has his friend follow him. Ten minutes later the friend returns.
"Where did he go?" demands the barber.
"To your house."

or

Three cowboys are out on the range talking about sex. "The rodeo position is my favorite," one of the cowboys says.
"I don't think I've ever heard of that one," says another.
"What is it?" asks a third.
"You mount your lady from behind, reach around and grab her breasts, and whisper in her ear, 'These feel just like your sister's,' and then try to hold on for eight seconds."

[fikusroot]

"My first shroom trip went something like this. A friend gave them to me at a party and I stuck them in my pocket and forgot about them. A few days later, I decide to give them a try. Now, I planned the rest of the day as if I was smoking weed, which I figure is ok. You wont be as crispy, but you'll stll be fine. So anyway, I take the shrooms and then go to get a hair cut. Im sitting there and the guy starts cutting my hair. I look at my watch and I start thinking, man this stuff sucks. And then I look in the mirror. A giant penis is cutting my hair. I say to myself "it's ok dave, there is not a giant penis cutting your hair. You are on drugs." But I freak out anyway and run home. So I'm running home and i think to myself damn, I've got to sober up quick. I look at my watch and it 3:45. So I go and jog around the block a few times. Still high. I go inside and take a cold shower. Still high. I listen to every cd in my music collection. I am still high. I finally decide to just sleep it off. I take a nap and wake up, still high. I look at my watch. It is now 3:46."
-Dave Chapelle