When I was 8 I tempted fate,
I smothered my balls in peanut butter.
When my dog came up it was too late,
He licked and licked I screamed "Oh Mother!".
Then I heard a pop,
and my heart almost stopped.
I looked down,
with a frown.
My left nut was not be be found.
I was only 8 ya' know,
I really shoulda' just hired a ho'