Quote Originally Posted by graph
Yes. It is a vile weed, much worse than cocaine or heroin. Marihuana, as it is called by the Mexicans, is brought up from the border by Mexican drug cartels. Afro jazz musicians smoke it, for it slows down time and allows them to include extra notes, also known as "devil notes", into their horrid music. These "devil notes" are called so because listening to such filth can turn one into a worshipper of Satan.

Why, even one hit from this "reefer" can turn you into a psychopath, and ingesting this substance orally can cause one to become a cannibal. Lock your doors, hide your children, and for God's sakes, don't give in to the reefer madness! Oh, and every time you take a hit, the baby jesus cries. There's also something about communism I believe.

Nah, I'm just kiddin ya's.

Sorry about that, I'm high.
Also, smoking marihuana can cause men to grow breasts and turn into Pagan homosexuals. Marihuana causes a chemical imbalance in the brain which opens up a direct psychic link to the Prince of Darkness. The feeling of being high on marihuana is extremely horrible, with such symptoms as dry mouth, excessive coughing, migraines and terrifying hallucinations. But the only way to stop the symptoms is to listen to the voices in your head caused by Satan which tell you to eat babies and rape elderly people in the street. But marihuana severely affects the memory so the user then thinks the experience was pleasant, which drives him to take more of the drug and become an addict.