I fucking hate Local Area Networks. I'v spent the last 32 hours trying to set my computer up, and I get nowhere. I resolve to call the techies the next day, wake up, try to connect one more time, and it goes off without a hitch. Fuck technology.

Anyway, I said I would post a theory for time-travel, and my wake and bake sense tells me that I might as well do that now that I'm all toasted up with nowhere to go. This is a little more sci-fi than my usual explanation, but I still find it fun to go over it when I'm baked.

First of all, there are two theories of the apocalypse based upon the observation that the velocity with which planets are travelling away from their point of origin (the epicenter of the Big Band) is decreasing with time. One theory is that the Big Bang has launched all matter with an adequate escape velocity and that every iota of matter and energy will drift away and slowly die out. Thus the universe will end, not with a bang, but a whimper. My theory rests upon the second theory; that escape velocity was not reached, and that every atom and joule will be pulled back in to the massive gravity entity at the center of the universe, will be compressed into a size less than an electron, and another Big Bang will occur with time. If the latter theory is true, then every action performed by every entity has been perfomed an untold number of times. This is with the assumtion that the Big Bang occurs with the same force as it did before, which is logical due to the presence of an identical amount of matter and energy as the last one. There would be no reason for a discrepancy, since no outside forces exist that could act upon the original mass. My theory, in effect, is a waiting game. The easiest task would be to calculate the exact position in space where the place is you want to send your traveller, and how long from the time of launch this time will occur again. Once this is determined, on would have to develop some sort of travelling device that is unaffected by time or that can release inhabitants from the effects of time, possibly in the realm of advanced cryogenics. After this pod is produced, one would have to find a way to hide it from the effects of gravity. One would have to send it into space with adequate escape velocity, and program it to return to the correct place at the correct time. Since neither the fuel efficiency nor the presrvation technology exist in any forseeable future, the realization of this action is centuries, perhaps millennia, away. In addition, there may be side effects of removing that amount of matter. It could be a such a delicate cycle that this removal of matter would disrupt it and make it so there is no Earth to return to, or it could be negligible, like the effect of drinking out of a river. The river still flows. Even with this danger, it would be undone one cycle later when the travelling device is returned to the gravitational center. This technique would also avoid problems with the space-time continuum. Should we disrupt that the universe could never return to normal. This methodology would render time-paradox dangers inapplicable.

Realistically, the inhabitant of the waiting-pod would have to be data or some sort of advanced artificially intelligent android. That is why I sincerely believe that Jesus was an android sent back in time to kill the ancestor of Abe Lincoln, but his cpu was damaged in transit and switched over to Robotic Messiah mode. Those damned Future Republicans!
zarathustra Reviewed by zarathustra on . Tralfaldamorian ideology I fucking hate Local Area Networks. I'v spent the last 32 hours trying to set my computer up, and I get nowhere. I resolve to call the techies the next day, wake up, try to connect one more time, and it goes off without a hitch. Fuck technology. Anyway, I said I would post a theory for time-travel, and my wake and bake sense tells me that I might as well do that now that I'm all toasted up with nowhere to go. This is a little more sci-fi than my usual explanation, but I still find it fun to Rating: 5