Help, advice would be appreciated....

[Kryzco]

I got out of a 2 year relationship in september, and I was still sleeping with him for a few months but then I decided to stop because I needed to just move on and so did he, I didn't want him to remain attached to me especially since we were each others firsts...

Well a month before hand, I met a guy through mutual friends and it turned out our families knew each other, my brother grew up with his cousin, and my best friend used to date his other cousin, well me and the new guy started to hang out a lot, all the time, well one time he crashed here and one thing turned into another, and we've been fuck buddies, at first it was cool, we were both feeling each other but because of our families knowing each other and his age difference we can't go out, so we just left it as it was...

now things are all fucked up because, I don't want to say fell in love with him, but i like him so much, and he always tells me he loves me, but because i know how he can be, i think he's feeding me bs, and when i told him I had feelings for him, he told me to get over him, that it was just sex....

needless to say I'm still pretty upset about the situation, i still talk to him because we became best friends, and if we were to suddenly stop talking, people would eventually figure out what went on, and that can't happen

I'm basically over him but its just fuckin hard because there's really no way to avoid him, and I told him about just for us to not chill or talk for a while until we can get our shit together and he basically got pissed about it and got really upset because I'm like his best friend and we both went through some rough shit together and we always had each others backs

god I wish I had some smokage right now......

I don't know what to do, but thats my situation

sorry for the long post, I just needed to get that off my chest.....

I posted this in another thread already but I figured I'd make my own because i need input from someone from outside of anyone I know

Advice is appreciated and encouraged but please no flaming or calling me a dumbass or whatnot

thanks guys

Kryzco Reviewed by Kryzco on 03-21-2006. Help, advice would be appreciated.... I got out of a 2 year relationship in september, and I was still sleeping with him for a few months but then I decided to stop because I needed to just move on and so did he, I didn't want him to remain attached to me especially since we were each others firsts... Well a month before hand, I met a guy through mutual friends and it turned out our families knew each other, my brother grew up with his cousin, and my best friend used to date his other cousin, well me and the new guy started to Rating: 5

[friendowl]

if i was doing a girl and she told me she had feelings for me
and i told her to get over it that would mean that i want nothing
more than free sex.no more no less

if i liked a girl and she said she had feelings for me
i would be the happiest guy.when you like a girl all you
want is for her to like you back.
its the best when they confess a feeling

[Kryzco]

well we talked about it yesterday and he said that he did have feelings for me and yet he knows I have feelings for him but tells me to get over him and blah

we both have mutual feelings for each other but for some reason its wrong for me on my end

shit just pisses me off

I guessing I wanna ask how do I go about bringing up the fact that I need to get away from him for a long time without coming off as a bitch

[graph]

if you're as old as I think you are I feel very uncomfortable with everything you just said.

Sounds to me like all he wanted was a booty call. Any time he says "I have feelings for you too but you should get over me" is the same as saying "You were really good in bed, but you're gonna need to get off my cock now".

Just sayin.

[beachguy in thongs]

Kryzco, I liked how you asked for advice. It's hard for me to read and give advice about because I'd give you a biased opinion based on the fact that you're a single girl. Or, close enough.

Follow your heart, which is kept in check with weed, so basically, follow the Herb.

[Kryzco]

I'm not that old, and he's not that young, 2 years to be exact

and I agree with ya 100% graph, thats what I come to realize and thats why I've been trying to avoid that situation altogether, I'm smartining up slowly

But its kinda weird because he's the one who always initiates everything, I've always been the one who says its gotta end and he'll agree to me, but then the next time he see's me he tries to be all affectionate, I didn't say sexual, I said affectionate, all lovey dovery bullshit, and well yeah, I was being stupid and I kept falling for it.....

Its pretty much all done now, I see him a lot less now, and when I do, I'm pretty much very distant at the moment, I just told him straight up, I'm fuckin done with it, it was a fun ride while it lasted and thats it, and I mean it this time, because I do, I got better things to do with my time.....

But to you guys I wanna thank ya, and if anyone else has any input, please feel free to put ur 2 cents in...

All I keep thinking is time heals all wounds, learn from your mistakes, and this too shall pass

[graph]

Yeah I'd be all lovey dovey if I wanted to get in someone's pants too.

So you're saying he's younger than you? If you're the age I think you are, I just got some gross visuals. No, that's not true. I'd have gross visuals if he was two years older than you, too.

Woman, fairest ever seen
Was the bride he crowned as queen,
Pillowed on the marriage-bed
Whispering to his soul, he said
"Though no monarch ever pressed
Fairer bosom to his breast,
Mortal flesh is only clay!
'EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY."

Theodore Titlten

[Theduderino]

I'm not that old, and he's not that young, 2 years to be exact

and I agree with ya 100% graph, thats what I come to realize and thats why I've been trying to avoid that situation altogether, I'm smartining up slowly

But its kinda weird because he's the one who always initiates everything, I've always been the one who says its gotta end and he'll agree to me, but then the next time he see's me he tries to be all affectionate, I didn't say sexual, I said affectionate, all lovey dovery bullshit, and well yeah, I was being stupid and I kept falling for it.....

Its pretty much all done now, I see him a lot less now, and when I do, I'm pretty much very distant at the moment, I just told him straight up, I'm fuckin done with it, it was a fun ride while it lasted and thats it, and I mean it this time, because I do, I got better things to do with my time.....

But to you guys I wanna thank ya, and if anyone else has any input, please feel free to put ur 2 cents in...

All I keep thinking is time heals all wounds, learn from your mistakes, and this too shall pass

Hmm, where to start..

Ah, relationships can be quite the complicated thing. But one thing that makes a relationship work is simply love for one another and close friendship. From what I've been reading here I have seen nothing except a man who cannot keep his dick out of his pants, sorry if I offended. To me, he seems to be an individual who saw an opportunity since he saw a woman looking for comfort from a broken relationship and he saw a weakness through affection. Basically he wanted nothing except sex.

Also by using the relationship both families have he figured that would be his edge since you would feel uncomfortable telling him to back off since the family would notice. Of course, one cannot deny some good sex but, as I see it, that's all it was. Now it is time to move on and file away this short experience.

But you mustn't let his affectionate feeling overcome you. Remember, he uses it simply to get some more because he knows you give in when he becomes all lovely dovey. There will be nothing more than sex so if this isn't what you want, then it's about time to end it. I know there are complications with the family but keep this in mind: If it was to continue, it'll only get more complicated.

Trust me, he'll get over it because he didn't have any feelings for you in the first place. He just saw a friend of the family needing sex and he took advantage of it. Oh sure, he'll put up his act and try to make you feel bad so you give in again but if you keep stern, he'll eventually give up.

Will you lose him as a friend or cause problems with the family? I cannot say for certain but ending it now will lessen the size of the problem. Personally I think he'll just give up and stop if you keep stern. I doubt he'll jeopardize the family relationship because if he did, he'll be the one looking like an ass since he'll look like nothing more than a sex-crazed maniac.

Just be true to your heart and let this go. All this means is that there is someone out there you are destined to meet who will bring warmth to your heart, but the only way that'll happen is if you have no ties to the past. Start with a fresh mind. Well that's my two cents .

Peace,
The Duderino

[Kryzco]

Awww see thats what I was looking for

My side of the family knows already, they don't care honestly, they told me its my choice and as long as I'm responsible they are fine

But I am seeing the light, and thats what I felt it was too, nothing more than a re-bound, but also I wasn't looking for sex, just someone to talk to, someone to be there, my break up with my bf wasn't messy at all, we are still very good friends, and I now realized why we always got along, communication, which me and the new guy don't seem to have

I've learned alot from this experience, and I've learned to be careful, I honestly thought he wasn't like that, and I was wrong, I guess the whole being dumb-founded by it is whats bothering me the most, to think you know someone and then to see the real side and see the hidden agenda

I'm pretty much over him already, I'm tired of the bullshit and I realized I need a man, not a boy, I wish there was a way I could make him feel my pain, and know what the hell he put me through and the time that I wasted, but hey what doesn't kill you makes you stronger...

I'm not trying to make him out to be a total asshole, he has his moments where he'll go out of his way to make sure I had food in my stomach when I had nothing to eat in a couple of days, and in the beginning things were awesome, I was the happiest I've been in ages, its wasn't even about sex when we first met, it just kind of happened, and which I think was the demise of our friendship, I'm not gonna put the blame solely on him because it takes 2 to tango, all I ever asked for was honesty, had I known this beforehand I would have never slept with him in the first place, I mean yeah the sex was amazing, and I think thats what drew me to him, or at least its what keeps making me give in, he's coming by today, and I'm gonna have a LONG talk with him, and if he lies to me, I'm done with him period, if our friendship means anything to him, then hopefully he'll prove it

Its just that things have been hard for me for a while now, and he was a huge part of my life because he was there for me when I needed someone and he was my rock, for a long time, he would refuse to go out with people and just come over so that i could have company, and there were times when i made advances and he pushed me away, and I could tell he was in the mood, those little things are what makes me so confused about this whole ordeal and make me think it wasn't only sex, and maybe he did actually give a shit about me

but meh what can I do, I'm waiting to see what happens today and if he's bullshiting me i'm done

i'm not gonna lie to you duderino, our conversation yesterday really impacted me alot, it made me realize i got bigger fish to fry, and other things to take care of which i'm gonna get on it, which I want to thank you for, you really showed me a good perspective on my life which I should have been seeing a long time ago

[graph]

People had a conversation without me?

Why is graph always left out...:sadcrying

I only chose that smiley because there's no murdering smiley.